(no subject)
I am not one to mince words. Building houses is hard work. Every second of carrying hollow blocks, mixing cement and shoveling gravel under the scorching hot sun made me wish I was anywhere but under the scorching sun, carrying heavy stuff and breathing dusty air. And while it is politically correct (and only decent) to say that it was worth it, I won't say that it was worth it.
Because saying it was worth it would mean equating the time I spent with the wonderfully down-to-earth people of Sitio Pajo to the tedious task of building houses, which is definitely not something I would say. Saying it was worth it would mean that Nanay Gloria and Ate Jinky and everyone else I got to know is like the 'reward' I got for building, which is really not the case. Instead, I would probably phrase my experience as 'Building houses and hearts'.
I went to Sitio Pajo to build houses; at the same time, I went there to build hearts-- other people's hearts, and my own as well. They are two separate things, different but similar; two parallel lines, close but never intersecting. I built houses and moaned, groaned and felt mutinous when my worn shoes finally broke down and started to speak (haha) revelled when it was breaktime, and rejoice when the day was finally done. The work was its own reward-- it wasn't easy, but somehow, it just made sense to do it.
Building hearts was what surrounded the exhausting effort of building houses.During the earlier hours of the morning and the later hours of the evening, I laughed, exchanged stories and grew exasperated (but fondly so) at the makulit ways of my adopted siblings and their seemingly endless neighbors. It's funny how you never run out of stories to tell (or kasabawan to share) when there is no TV or internet to distract you.
They are so alike, in the sense that both got me really exhausted. Building houses, of course, exhausted me physically. After all the shovelling and the lifting (and the moaning, because it takes energy to moan too), I was basically drained of strength. Ironically, I wanted to do more because there was still much work to do. Unfortunately, I couldn't because my physically unfit self would not allow me to. Building hearts on the other hand, exhausted me beyond compare because there were so many stories coming out at once; so many emotions coursing through that it was overwhelming, which in a way, really was exhausting. The best difference between the two is that with building hearts, when I wanted to go on, I could despite exhaustion. Because while my aching muscles could not take anymore, my heart, which was maybe filled to the brim with everything was still ready to take more. :)
So yea, all things considered, immersion is a pretty life-changing experience. It's not in that 'I-am-so-ready-to-change-this-world-way', but more of in that 'I-just-saw-the-world-a-little-clearer' way. And that's just awesome. :)
p.s. not looking in the mirror for 3 days was awesome too. :)) I think not looking into a mirror everyday is good for your health. Maybe I'll start doing that :D
Because saying it was worth it would mean equating the time I spent with the wonderfully down-to-earth people of Sitio Pajo to the tedious task of building houses, which is definitely not something I would say. Saying it was worth it would mean that Nanay Gloria and Ate Jinky and everyone else I got to know is like the 'reward' I got for building, which is really not the case. Instead, I would probably phrase my experience as 'Building houses and hearts'.
I went to Sitio Pajo to build houses; at the same time, I went there to build hearts-- other people's hearts, and my own as well. They are two separate things, different but similar; two parallel lines, close but never intersecting. I built houses and moaned, groaned and felt mutinous when my worn shoes finally broke down and started to speak (haha) revelled when it was breaktime, and rejoice when the day was finally done. The work was its own reward-- it wasn't easy, but somehow, it just made sense to do it.
Building hearts was what surrounded the exhausting effort of building houses.During the earlier hours of the morning and the later hours of the evening, I laughed, exchanged stories and grew exasperated (but fondly so) at the makulit ways of my adopted siblings and their seemingly endless neighbors. It's funny how you never run out of stories to tell (or kasabawan to share) when there is no TV or internet to distract you.
They are so alike, in the sense that both got me really exhausted. Building houses, of course, exhausted me physically. After all the shovelling and the lifting (and the moaning, because it takes energy to moan too), I was basically drained of strength. Ironically, I wanted to do more because there was still much work to do. Unfortunately, I couldn't because my physically unfit self would not allow me to. Building hearts on the other hand, exhausted me beyond compare because there were so many stories coming out at once; so many emotions coursing through that it was overwhelming, which in a way, really was exhausting. The best difference between the two is that with building hearts, when I wanted to go on, I could despite exhaustion. Because while my aching muscles could not take anymore, my heart, which was maybe filled to the brim with everything was still ready to take more. :)
So yea, all things considered, immersion is a pretty life-changing experience. It's not in that 'I-am-so-ready-to-change-this-world-way', but more of in that 'I-just-saw-the-world-a-little-clearer' way. And that's just awesome. :)
p.s. not looking in the mirror for 3 days was awesome too. :)) I think not looking into a mirror everyday is good for your health. Maybe I'll start doing that :D