{fic} Oneshot: Moving In (Part 5)
Title: Moving In
Characters: Yamashita Tomohisa, Ikuta Toma, mentions of TomaPi friends and the Ikuta household.
Pairings: TomaPi, hints of Akame
Rating: PG (language)
Genre: Fluff/Crack?
Summary: Toma gets busy, and Tomohisa moves in.
Disclaimer: Mine. In my head.
Part 1. Part 2. Part 3. Part 4.
a/n: OKAY first of all, otanjoubi omedetou! Yamashita Tomohisa is 24 years old!!
uhm, first, this fic is sooooo delayed and i'm very sorry! exams killed my brains and i forgot what i was about to write! but luckily my brain retrieved the information so the story finishes as planned and even if Saturday has already passed-- the story can continue. So for those of you-- last Saturday was April 4, and KAT-TUN's Ueda Tatsuya performed his play Romeo and Juliet in Osaka from April 2 to 5, if memory serves me right. So look up the cast, and yeah, he's our mystery caller. :) and on the side, R&J in Osaka + Ryo-chan in Osaka for KJ8 album = RyoDa fic! hahaha i want that! damn! :)
here's the last part. :) i'll sleep and maybe write a post-birthday OTP fic! <3333 i sooo love TomaPi i could faint.
it's 2am and i have to attend our Holy Week Prayer and Fasting so i'll beta this later, okay?
comments please!!
0.81
It takes him an hour before Tomohisa is convinced that he needs to go down. Apparently half an hour ago Toma had decided to call all their friends and had asked them to bombard the younger one with messages to convince him to face the older man.
Idiot. What the hell happened? Make up then call me, or call me then make up. What the hell, just call me, alright Pi? -Jin
Yamapi, genki? Ikuta-kun told us you were fighting AGAIN. Don't fight too long, hurry up and say sorry to each other okay? We need our leader to be leader-like and not sulky! Shige sends his regards too. Pyon! -Keii
Tomohisa, it's me. I think that's great you're moving in, you're really following my footsteps! You know I once did that when I thought Tsubasa was cheating obguakhdugsfvk--
sorry about that, Takki has lost his mind. Anyways, don't fight too long and talk to either one of us if you need anything, I'm sure your Papa and I will always find time for you. Contact me as soon as anything happens, alright Tomo? -Takki/Tsubasa
Yamashita-kun, domo. I heard from Shun-kun (yes Toma the idiot actually told Shun the blabbermouth who told me) that you two fought about me, or if that was me, which it wasn't. Anyway, just so we're clear that wasn't me Toma was going to meet, although I don't know who that was. If you must know Masaki and Sho have kidnapped me and I'm in Sendai, so yeah, Toma and I won't be seeing each other until next month, I think. So don't start a fight because of something moronic, yes? I guess I'll know from Toma if you guys have made up. Ja~ -Matsujun
Hey stupid, Toma messaged me. You're really moving in with him? I told you that was a bad move. Oh, he also told me about your fight. March your ass up to him and apologize so he can tell you what's going on. I'm in Osaka, you two better be here this Saturday. Don't mess up. -Ryo
The younger one sighs, finally raises his white flag, and decides that Toma has endured much of the cold shoulder, because he was never the one to get mad for more than 5 hours at the most. That's so unfair, everybody always sides with him. He figures that since the older one has some explaining to do, they better get this over with. After all, he still has to convince Toma that he's staying over, and he really can't do that if they're fighting. After much eye-rubbing and self-convincing that the tear stains on his face are not obvious and he most definitely does not look like a blowfish, he opens the door and heads downstairs, silent shuffling of feet and carefully engined movements, seemingly afraid of being found out. But alas, the floorboard on one of the steps creaks, and Toma-- who seems on the verge of dozing off-- suddenly snaps his head up, and sees the younger one, head down and shoulders slumped, hair all messed up in directions that can't be exactly described as N-E-W-S. Toma sits up from where he is slouched on the couch, the movement alerting Tomohisa who finally looks at Toma, his Toma, and gauges at how to start this very awkward conversation and this uncomfortable making up. He collects his thoughts and gets ready to speak to--
“Tomo.”
The younger one looks at his caller, eyes questioning. The older one makes no response; just looks too apologetic, tear stains also apparent in his face. For some reason Tomohisa feels guilty, but he shrugs it off too easily because Toma still hasn't explained anything, and has hit him on top of that. He looks around him, and the living room is a complete mess-- the couches are in total disarray, the carpet in weird angles, and the table has now been pushed to the wall, the magazines that used to be underneath it now in uncoordinated heaps on the floor. When Toma calls his name again he looks at said man, who says nothing, but instead pats the space next to him on the couch.
Tomohisa stills, thinks, breathes, lets his defense crumble down-- fine. He makes his way over to the couch, but picks up Jam and carries her in his arms before he sits next to the older man, his back facing Toma. He looks at the toy poodle, ruffles her fur affectionately, a small smile ghosting his lips, “Baby, how are--”
“Tomo. I'm sorry. Look at me. Please.”
He knows that Toma's voice is strained, and he figures that the older one must be holding back his tears. For a moment he forgets everything, doesn't remember what the hell started this stupid argument that has them biting at each other's throats so early in the morning. He sighs but still doesn't look. “No apologies, not yet. Explain. Who.”
The older one understands, even at the lack of words. “Wasn't Matsujun, if you're insisting it was.”
“Hmmn. He messaged me, said it wasn't him.”
Toma's reply is cut short with this. “Wha-what? He messaged you? I- I didn't--”
“Shun-kun did,” and he emphasizes on the name, apparently jealous at said Shun as well.
“O-oh.”
Silence.
“Ikuta,” the younger one's voice is cold, “I'm not yet appeased. Continue.”
Toma gulps reflexively, the use of his last name clearly isn't a good sign. “That-- wasn't Matsujun. Yeah. Uhm, he's someone important though. You want to guess?” He opts for lightening up the mood.
Does he really take me for an idiot? His thoughts are everywhere, but he struggles to think of a common friend with the name Jun. Someone pops into his mind. “Why would Mabudachi's brother call you? Are you dating behind my back or something?” He doesn't even bother to hide the sarcasm in his voice.
“Or something,” Toma snorts, “and that wasn't that Jun either. Pick another one, loser.” Whoops, maybe I shouldn't have retorted like a wise-ass, but he has already spoken up.
He is lucky Tomohisa zoned out after the 'either'. The younger keeps on thinking of another Jun, someone other than the two. But there are only three Jun's that we know. Matsujun, Shirotan's nii, and--
“That was JUN? OUR JUN?” he turns fully to face Toma, wide-eyed.
“The one and only.” Toma boasts his arrogant smirk.
“Bu-but why? What did he want? And why is Hasejun calling you and not me? Unfair!” he hastily puts aside Jam and crosses his arms over his chest. Toma laughs at this, amused at the younger one's sudden change of mood. He tugs on Tomohisa's arm and moves closer, but the younger doesn't budge. He looks thoughtfully at the other and tugs again, and this time Tomohisa relents, lets his back rest on Toma's chest, their hands now entangled, and his body between the other's legs in a very awkward hug.
“Jun--” he rests his head on the Tomohisa's shoulder, “wants us to go to Osaka. To see him this weekend. They're performing there until Sunday, Romeo and Juliet ring a bell to you?” the younger one nods at this, remembers something about Ryo excitedly telling him during their last phone conversation about a certain princess spending the weekend at his parent's house. And then Ryo's earlier message. You two. Osaka. This Saturday.
“Ueda-kun's play, right?” he manages to squeak out.
“Hmmmn. I was supposed to ask you to come see one of the Tokyo shows with me, but we didn't have the same free days, and I gues it was kind of good timing-- you moving in and stuff and Jun calling about the Osaka show. We'll see it, then? I need to tell him in advance, he might make plans with Shoon-kun or something--”
“Toma, breathe. We'll see it.”
“Oh, okay.” Toma smiles sheepishly. He closes his eyes, presses his lips to the younger's shoulder blade and inhales his scent. “I'm sorry. Am I forgiven?”
Tomohisa looks unsure, feels even more confused. He weighs his words. “For the phonecall, yes. But only because it's Jun. And because we have to be in good terms when we go see him perform. You're lucky it wasn't someone else.”
“The phonecall?”
“Yes, you're forgiven for that.” He plays with the older one's fingers, brings them up so he can kiss them one by one, the man behind him sighing. “You hit me,” he speaks again, “you have to make up for that.”
And Toma remembers, regrets that stupid punch because not only will their managers eat them alive, but he also really didn't mean anything with the punch. It was done on pure impulse, something to distract Tomohisa from his anger-clouded vision at that moment. He moves forward and pries his hands off the younger one, uses this to tilt Tomohisa's face so he can kiss his left cheek, then right. “Does it hurt?”
“No.”
He is somehow, not convinced. “Where then?”
“Stupid,” the younger one answers back. “You hit me. You snapped at me. You never run out of patience, not on me, not even when I got jealous of you and other people countless of times. You didn't get mad even when I got jealous at Tsubasa.” he fidgets, because he doesn't know how to say it. “Our schedules basically suck, and I just missed you, so so much. And you snap at me the first chance you get.”
Toma feels the younger one trying to hold back tears, and with the way his voice sounded he wouldn't last long. He can't do anything else because technically, he's at fault. They were separated back when they were juniors, too close for comfort, he had heard Johnny talking to Takki and Tsubasa about the two top replacements once the duo had debuted. It was a plan for Tomohisa to debut, but not with him. Doing otherwise would result to either one of them being fired by the agency, if not both. They were talented, yes, and had promising futures, but the agency saw their feelings as a hindrance to their blossoming careers. You need to pave your own way for now, get the other out of your system. Maybe in the future, when you're both more mature, maybe then you can work out a compromise with the old man, Tsubasa had told him on the beach when he cried his heart out. His closest senior had stayed with him until dawn broke, had never left even when he ran out of tears to cry. After that he had a talk with the younger one, who apparently had taken the announcement of a debut more harshly than he had. Tomohisa was in tears, clutching onto Takki's shirt and not wanting to show his face to Toma when he and Tsubasa arrived at the Jimusho.
“Pi,” Takki coaxed him, “come on, let go of me and talk to Toma. He's listening.”
A muffled sob. And another. Tomohisa isn't going to let go, but he feels hands prying his own away from Takki's shirt. He finally looks and sees Toma's hands holding his, grip firm and secure, assuring him of their bond. Nothing will change because they can't break us, his hold says. He finally relents on releasing his senpai's abused shirt, but latches onto Toma's arm, engulfing him in a bone-crushing hug.
“He-hey, easy there. I'm not going anywhere.” Toma pats the younger one's back soothingly. His words however, make the other convulse into tears again.
“You're not. I am.” his words are unclear, absorbed into Toma's shoulder, but he doesn't care. He's not letting go. The agency can't take Toma away from him. “I don't want to go. I'm not debuting. Not without you.”
“Stupid,” Toma chuckles, “you can't not want this, alright? This is our dream! We've worked for this for what, seven years? Don't waste it on such nonsense, Tomo.”
“Nonsense?” Tomohisa pushes back, looks incredulously at Toma. “Dream? That's exactly why I don't want to. It's OUR dream, how am I supposed to be happy if we're not together?!”
“Tomohisa, listen to me,” because I don't think I can say this straight to your face again without breaking, he adds, “we've worked our asses off for this chance ever since we saw each other. This is the start of something great, for you at least. We'll both have lots of offers one day, you just have dibs on the first one, okay? Do it for me-- no, do it for us. Jun, Shunsuke, and I have our hopes in you. Even Jimmy wishes you luck.” He smiles at Tomohisa, eyes determined with a new flame of passion. He needs to be strong, for both of them. If Tomohisa breaks under all the pressure, he'll be there to catch him. He'd protect him with every ounce of his being, and one day they'll conquer all these obstacles. One day, he reminds himself, one day they can stand next to each other again.
“O-okay.” Tomohisa can't help but agree. He trusts Toma, trusts the older one with all of him, knows that of all people, Toma will never let him down, will always break his fall. He takes courage in Toma's words and his smile. “Okay, I'll debut. Anything to make you happy, Toma.” He smiles unsurely.
His hand finds Tomohisa's cheek, which he caresses lovingly. “That's the Tomohisa I know.” And he smiles back. “Don't worry”, he tries to lighten up the mood, “I've seen the list of your members, it seems Ryo-chan is there as well. You'll make new friends, yeah? Just don't scare the other juniors.”
“Ehem”, Takizawa interrupts, earning a hit on the head from Tsubasa, “could the lovers please get a room already? Your juniors are looking at you.” Tsubasa is already suppressing his giggle with his hand.
We'll be okay, they can't break us, Toma thinks. On camera, we might be apart, but when the cameras aren't filming and when the spotlight goes off, we always find our way back to each other.
0.89
Toma tightens his hold on the younger one. They had made that promise years ago, when everything they built together seemed to have crumbled. They made the promise to live for themselves, to find what they were both best at, and meet each other on their way. They were apart in terms of the industry, but their hearts never wavered, never changed faces throughout the years. They were in perfect synch despite the distance they tried to project, and even with Tomohisa's debut with eight other juniors, Toma caught up to him eventually, plays and drama roles being given to the older one, his acting skills being recognized all over the country. How many years has it been? With their careers constantly being leveled-up, time for each other is getting hard to acquire. Rehearsals for plays and concerts, photoshoots, dramas, and movies have them all wrung out and exhausted. Their sleeping habits and diet patterns are always all over the place nowadays, and it isn't really that hard to snap at something even so petty. Still, Toma knows neglecting the other is his fault.
“I've been forgetting you.” He kisses Tomohisa's neck, his hand finding the younger's.
“It's not because you're not babying me anymore, you know.” Tomohisa answers, voice now solid again. He revels into the warmth the older one radiates to him.
“Then tell me, what is it?”
“It's,” he pauses, “you'll think I'm stupid.”
“Try me.”
Tomohisa pouts. No way out now. “I-- I feel like I'm left behind.”
“What?” Toma is clearly shocked, but not one bit amused at the confession.
“You said,” the younger answers, playing with Toma's fingers again, “back then, you said we'd always be together. And you were right, you were always right. We managed to be together even after the debut, hell, even after the suspension. But when NEWS came back, it was-- it was different.”
“How so?” Toma asks, confused.
“You were great. My life was on hold-- well not actually but you get the rough idea-- and you were catching up to me. Before all that jazz it was always you chasing behind me, and we always ALWAYS had time for each other, like nothing had changed except that the public didn't see us together. But after that, you-- you suddenly became a frontliner, a headturner and I was scared. I was scared you'd get sucked in that light and you would go ahead without me anymore. I got paranoid thinking once you were up there you wouldn't look back for me.”
“Tomo--”
“No, let me finish. I tried to match your pace, but I couldn't. You are such a natural at this thing we do, you could become anything as long as you were determined but I-- I'm different Toma. If I lose sight of my original goal I can't come up with a new one, I'd immediately get lost. If-- if I lost you to the industry my world would've stopped. I love my work, but I really can't do anything if I lose you. I'd literally be nothing.” Tomohisa is now silently crying, this being one of his most notable and most practiced skills after countless fights with Toma, but the other knows better.
“You were scared that fame would eat us up, and we'd end up losing each other.” His hand expertly runs over the younger one's face, wiping away the tears running down Tomohisa's cheeks, then stroking his hair. “You got scared of the distance, that's why you wanted to move in?” He receives a nod. “And those terrible moodswings?”
The younger sighs. “I only got jealous because they had their hands all over you. I couldn't even steal a glance and all the others are throwing themselves at you.”
“It's too much, you know. We love each other too much.” He kisses Tomohisa's ear.
“I know. I'm sorry.”
“Tomo, you don't say sorry when you love someone.”
Said Tomo shrugs. “All I know is I haven't seen you properly for so long. We barely talk, and I know our schedules won't get better in the near future. I miss you, really really really miss you.” He kisses the back of Toma's hand. “You haven't even touched me in three months.” He looks down, ashamed. Toma, however, laughs at this.
“On your birthday, I promise.” Tomohisa looks at him and all the older can offer is his childish laugh and a kiss. They both move to stand up, with Tomohisa facing the other and hugging him tightly. Toma settles his hand on the younger's waist, relieved that finally, finally the storm has passed. They share their minute of silence, the unspoken promises of I forgive you and we're alright now hanging in the air. Now the only real issue remaining is Tomohisa moving in, and Toma is about to say something if not for the living room clock showing ten minutes to eleven a.m.
'Yabai!' Making up has taken longer than expected and now he is running late for work. Tomohisa, on the other hand, knows Toma's schedule, and when he sees the clock reminding him of how Toma's manager will surely have a fit, he only says, “we're okay now. Soooo, you're leaving.” He isn't too happy with what's going to happen next.
Toma pushes back and coyly smiles, looks at the younger one with eyes full of love. “Look, I have to go, it's almost eleven already. You know how I hate being late, yes?”, and Tomohisa replies with a forced grunt. “I don't know what time I'll be back, so use this time to think really carefully about what you want. Now if you're still here by the time I'm home, then we'll talk properly about this moving in thing.” He looks at Tomohisa whose eyes are glassy but are staring right back at him intensely. The younger opens his mouth to speak, but Toma beats him to it. “Yes, I understand. No parties, no clubs, no going out, right? I'll be home as soon as we finish work.”
Something in that statement strikes a chord in Tomohisa, an unwritten promise that makes him happy. He pecks the older one's lips affectionately, tightens his hold again, and they stay like that for a few moments, Tomohisa basking in the temporary warmth they are sharing, Toma rubbing soothing circles on the small of his back. The older wonders when the other can fully trust him when he says that he's staying, just like he has been for the past twelve years; wonders when Tomohisa will be able to let him go without that fear of him not returning, because he will always, ALWAYS return home, back to Tomohisa's arms. If you only knew how much I love you, idiot. He looks at his watch, and if he doesn't leave in five minutes his manager will have his head on a plate, so he pries Tomohisa's hands off of him, which proves to be useless.
“Tomo, come on, let go.”
“No.”
“I'll be really late. I don't want my manager to get mad at you.”
“NO.”
“Stubborn ass.” And he hits Tomohisa's butt playfully, earning him a 'hey!' and a whack to the head. But that works because Tomohisa's not hugging him anymore.
“I'm going.” He steps forward and chastely kisses Tomohisa on the lips, and he smiles back at the angelic face beaming at him. The younger sees him off, and he can't resist but place another kiss on those lips, just to remind them both that whatever happened this morning-- the fights, the making up, moving in-- was real. Leaving a smiling Tomohisa behind, Toma silently prays that the younger will be there later when he comes home. Something at the back of his head tells him it won't be long before he-- they decide to move out of the house, anything to make Tomohisa happy.
0.92
He looks at his watch. Three-fifteen. His phone rings, Love Song.
“Moshi moshi?”
“Hey.”
“Hey yourself. Anything wrong?”
“No.” Such arrogance. “I can't call if I miss you?”
A smile up to his ears. “You're not alone. I miss you too. What are you doing?”
A happy face. “Nothing important. So is crank in going okay?”
“Pretty much.” A chuckle. “Would be better if you were here, though. Could use the company.” He scratches the back of his neck unconsciously. “Oh, Manami-chan says hi.”
“Saejima?” His left eyebrow is raised. “Tell her I said good luck.”
“Mmmm.” A pause. “Will you be home when I come back?”
“Maybe, maybe not.” He suppresses a smirk.
“Guess I'll have to find out, ne? But I'll be home late this evening, my female co-stars are asking me out tonight.”
“I don't think you'll even consider that option. I know where you live.” His face sports a proud smile.
“Oh? Really? Do we live together? My wife's really possessive.” He teases, tries to mask the urge to ask the younger one to fetch him now. He misses him, but work goes first.
“I don't know if we live together,” he rides on the joke, resists to tell the older one to come home already, “but your wife and I are good friends. I suggest you go home immediately after filming.” He'll wait. He can always wait, if it's Toma.
“I'll think about it.” The break is over, and he hates long filming hours with only ten minutes of break in between, but he can do nothing about it. “I have to go, director's calling.”
“Oh, okay.” his voice sounds less cheerful. “Take care out there.”
“Mmmm. You too.”
Silence. But the line still isn't dead.
“Hey.”
“Hmmm?” he holds his breathe.
“I love you.” he is hopeful.
His heart is filled with warmth. “Do your best. I love you too.”
Three- twenty nine.
1.00
It is no surprise to Toma when he goes home that night and finds Tomohisa curled up in his bed, Jam hugged closed to his chest. The clock glares 11:45pm at him, and he quietly shuffles about in his room to get his towel, a tank top, and his boxers. He walks carefully to the bathroom and takes a shower-- sleeping with work clothes on is simply unhygienic. Fifteen minutes later and he is ready for bed. He turns on the night light to avoid tripping on the still gathered heap of clothes-- if Tomohisa's staying they should really clean up, that or move out and just live in the younger's apartment. He reaches the bed and playfully pokes the other's chest.
“Mrrrmpfgh.”
“Tadaima.”
Tomohisa stirs, cracks one eye open, and yawns all too cutely, swallowing a supposedly 'okaeri'. When he doesn't move though, Toma frowns and lightly kicks at his feet.
“Tomo. I'm tired.”
“Ngrrrh. So?”
“Move, idiot. That's my bed.” He pouts; he is tired from the filming, and he assumes that the younger just stayed home all day so he shouldn't be that exhausted. “Tomohisa!” he raises his voice, causing the other to grunt and blearily sit up. Tomohisa cuddles Jam-chan a bit, then carefully puts her down on the floor, a couple of disheveled shirts serving as her makeshift bed. He scoots over to the left so that Toma can lie on the bed as well. The older one shakes his head, reaches for the nightlight and turns it off, then goes to bed, his back facing Tomohisa. He is about to drift off when a pair of arms wrap around his waist, and he wriggles a little to make themselves a little more comfortable.
“So.”
“Hmm?”
“You're here.”
“I'm sleepy. Sleep.”
“Well I just had my crank in. I'm exhausted too. Where were you today?”
Tomohisa shuffles a bit, obviously annoyed at being woken up. “Here. We cleaned the kitchen and the other rooms.”
“Oh?”
“Yes. And then our manager called, had to rehearse for the new single.” A yawn. “Or something.”
“So you're tired?”
“Basically yes, but maybe not as much as you.” Tomohisa leans closer to the warmth, his head on Toma's shoulder. “We're both tired, so let's sleep, okay? And no, I'm not moving out, so don't get cranky about having a mess in your room from now on.” Another yawn. “Your bed's too small.”
“I told you, my bed. If you want you can sleep on the couch.”
A smirk from the younger one. “Shut it. This may be your bed, but this,” and he hugs Toma tighter, his next sentence laced with confidence, “this is my Toma, so whatever he owns, I own. Now sleep.”
Toma finds no retort to that one, so he smiles to himself, thinks that maybe after this next drama he can convince the other one to move back with him to Tomohisa's apartment so that their privacy can be granted. He dwells happily on this and turns to face Tomohisa, hands automatically going to the other's chest. He pecks Tomohisa's lips before cuddling with him on the bed, the warmth just enough for the both of them to comfortably fall asleep with. Tonight he is the one who snuggles to the younger one's embrace, he is the one to be babied, and he feels safe, feels that everything is right, feels bliss right in Tomohisa's arms.
Characters: Yamashita Tomohisa, Ikuta Toma, mentions of TomaPi friends and the Ikuta household.
Pairings: TomaPi, hints of Akame
Rating: PG (language)
Genre: Fluff/Crack?
Summary: Toma gets busy, and Tomohisa moves in.
Disclaimer: Mine. In my head.
Part 1. Part 2. Part 3. Part 4.
a/n: OKAY first of all, otanjoubi omedetou! Yamashita Tomohisa is 24 years old!!
uhm, first, this fic is sooooo delayed and i'm very sorry! exams killed my brains and i forgot what i was about to write! but luckily my brain retrieved the information so the story finishes as planned and even if Saturday has already passed-- the story can continue. So for those of you-- last Saturday was April 4, and KAT-TUN's Ueda Tatsuya performed his play Romeo and Juliet in Osaka from April 2 to 5, if memory serves me right. So look up the cast, and yeah, he's our mystery caller. :) and on the side, R&J in Osaka + Ryo-chan in Osaka for KJ8 album = RyoDa fic! hahaha i want that! damn! :)
here's the last part. :) i'll sleep and maybe write a post-birthday OTP fic! <3333 i sooo love TomaPi i could faint.
it's 2am and i have to attend our Holy Week Prayer and Fasting so i'll beta this later, okay?
comments please!!
0.81
It takes him an hour before Tomohisa is convinced that he needs to go down. Apparently half an hour ago Toma had decided to call all their friends and had asked them to bombard the younger one with messages to convince him to face the older man.
Idiot. What the hell happened? Make up then call me, or call me then make up. What the hell, just call me, alright Pi? -Jin
Yamapi, genki? Ikuta-kun told us you were fighting AGAIN. Don't fight too long, hurry up and say sorry to each other okay? We need our leader to be leader-like and not sulky! Shige sends his regards too. Pyon! -Keii
Tomohisa, it's me. I think that's great you're moving in, you're really following my footsteps! You know I once did that when I thought Tsubasa was cheating obguakhdugsfvk--
sorry about that, Takki has lost his mind. Anyways, don't fight too long and talk to either one of us if you need anything, I'm sure your Papa and I will always find time for you. Contact me as soon as anything happens, alright Tomo? -Takki/Tsubasa
Yamashita-kun, domo. I heard from Shun-kun (yes Toma the idiot actually told Shun the blabbermouth who told me) that you two fought about me, or if that was me, which it wasn't. Anyway, just so we're clear that wasn't me Toma was going to meet, although I don't know who that was. If you must know Masaki and Sho have kidnapped me and I'm in Sendai, so yeah, Toma and I won't be seeing each other until next month, I think. So don't start a fight because of something moronic, yes? I guess I'll know from Toma if you guys have made up. Ja~ -Matsujun
Hey stupid, Toma messaged me. You're really moving in with him? I told you that was a bad move. Oh, he also told me about your fight. March your ass up to him and apologize so he can tell you what's going on. I'm in Osaka, you two better be here this Saturday. Don't mess up. -Ryo
The younger one sighs, finally raises his white flag, and decides that Toma has endured much of the cold shoulder, because he was never the one to get mad for more than 5 hours at the most. That's so unfair, everybody always sides with him. He figures that since the older one has some explaining to do, they better get this over with. After all, he still has to convince Toma that he's staying over, and he really can't do that if they're fighting. After much eye-rubbing and self-convincing that the tear stains on his face are not obvious and he most definitely does not look like a blowfish, he opens the door and heads downstairs, silent shuffling of feet and carefully engined movements, seemingly afraid of being found out. But alas, the floorboard on one of the steps creaks, and Toma-- who seems on the verge of dozing off-- suddenly snaps his head up, and sees the younger one, head down and shoulders slumped, hair all messed up in directions that can't be exactly described as N-E-W-S. Toma sits up from where he is slouched on the couch, the movement alerting Tomohisa who finally looks at Toma, his Toma, and gauges at how to start this very awkward conversation and this uncomfortable making up. He collects his thoughts and gets ready to speak to--
“Tomo.”
The younger one looks at his caller, eyes questioning. The older one makes no response; just looks too apologetic, tear stains also apparent in his face. For some reason Tomohisa feels guilty, but he shrugs it off too easily because Toma still hasn't explained anything, and has hit him on top of that. He looks around him, and the living room is a complete mess-- the couches are in total disarray, the carpet in weird angles, and the table has now been pushed to the wall, the magazines that used to be underneath it now in uncoordinated heaps on the floor. When Toma calls his name again he looks at said man, who says nothing, but instead pats the space next to him on the couch.
Tomohisa stills, thinks, breathes, lets his defense crumble down-- fine. He makes his way over to the couch, but picks up Jam and carries her in his arms before he sits next to the older man, his back facing Toma. He looks at the toy poodle, ruffles her fur affectionately, a small smile ghosting his lips, “Baby, how are--”
“Tomo. I'm sorry. Look at me. Please.”
He knows that Toma's voice is strained, and he figures that the older one must be holding back his tears. For a moment he forgets everything, doesn't remember what the hell started this stupid argument that has them biting at each other's throats so early in the morning. He sighs but still doesn't look. “No apologies, not yet. Explain. Who.”
The older one understands, even at the lack of words. “Wasn't Matsujun, if you're insisting it was.”
“Hmmn. He messaged me, said it wasn't him.”
Toma's reply is cut short with this. “Wha-what? He messaged you? I- I didn't--”
“Shun-kun did,” and he emphasizes on the name, apparently jealous at said Shun as well.
“O-oh.”
Silence.
“Ikuta,” the younger one's voice is cold, “I'm not yet appeased. Continue.”
Toma gulps reflexively, the use of his last name clearly isn't a good sign. “That-- wasn't Matsujun. Yeah. Uhm, he's someone important though. You want to guess?” He opts for lightening up the mood.
Does he really take me for an idiot? His thoughts are everywhere, but he struggles to think of a common friend with the name Jun. Someone pops into his mind. “Why would Mabudachi's brother call you? Are you dating behind my back or something?” He doesn't even bother to hide the sarcasm in his voice.
“Or something,” Toma snorts, “and that wasn't that Jun either. Pick another one, loser.” Whoops, maybe I shouldn't have retorted like a wise-ass, but he has already spoken up.
He is lucky Tomohisa zoned out after the 'either'. The younger keeps on thinking of another Jun, someone other than the two. But there are only three Jun's that we know. Matsujun, Shirotan's nii, and--
“That was JUN? OUR JUN?” he turns fully to face Toma, wide-eyed.
“The one and only.” Toma boasts his arrogant smirk.
“Bu-but why? What did he want? And why is Hasejun calling you and not me? Unfair!” he hastily puts aside Jam and crosses his arms over his chest. Toma laughs at this, amused at the younger one's sudden change of mood. He tugs on Tomohisa's arm and moves closer, but the younger doesn't budge. He looks thoughtfully at the other and tugs again, and this time Tomohisa relents, lets his back rest on Toma's chest, their hands now entangled, and his body between the other's legs in a very awkward hug.
“Jun--” he rests his head on the Tomohisa's shoulder, “wants us to go to Osaka. To see him this weekend. They're performing there until Sunday, Romeo and Juliet ring a bell to you?” the younger one nods at this, remembers something about Ryo excitedly telling him during their last phone conversation about a certain princess spending the weekend at his parent's house. And then Ryo's earlier message. You two. Osaka. This Saturday.
“Ueda-kun's play, right?” he manages to squeak out.
“Hmmmn. I was supposed to ask you to come see one of the Tokyo shows with me, but we didn't have the same free days, and I gues it was kind of good timing-- you moving in and stuff and Jun calling about the Osaka show. We'll see it, then? I need to tell him in advance, he might make plans with Shoon-kun or something--”
“Toma, breathe. We'll see it.”
“Oh, okay.” Toma smiles sheepishly. He closes his eyes, presses his lips to the younger's shoulder blade and inhales his scent. “I'm sorry. Am I forgiven?”
Tomohisa looks unsure, feels even more confused. He weighs his words. “For the phonecall, yes. But only because it's Jun. And because we have to be in good terms when we go see him perform. You're lucky it wasn't someone else.”
“The phonecall?”
“Yes, you're forgiven for that.” He plays with the older one's fingers, brings them up so he can kiss them one by one, the man behind him sighing. “You hit me,” he speaks again, “you have to make up for that.”
And Toma remembers, regrets that stupid punch because not only will their managers eat them alive, but he also really didn't mean anything with the punch. It was done on pure impulse, something to distract Tomohisa from his anger-clouded vision at that moment. He moves forward and pries his hands off the younger one, uses this to tilt Tomohisa's face so he can kiss his left cheek, then right. “Does it hurt?”
“No.”
He is somehow, not convinced. “Where then?”
“Stupid,” the younger one answers back. “You hit me. You snapped at me. You never run out of patience, not on me, not even when I got jealous of you and other people countless of times. You didn't get mad even when I got jealous at Tsubasa.” he fidgets, because he doesn't know how to say it. “Our schedules basically suck, and I just missed you, so so much. And you snap at me the first chance you get.”
Toma feels the younger one trying to hold back tears, and with the way his voice sounded he wouldn't last long. He can't do anything else because technically, he's at fault. They were separated back when they were juniors, too close for comfort, he had heard Johnny talking to Takki and Tsubasa about the two top replacements once the duo had debuted. It was a plan for Tomohisa to debut, but not with him. Doing otherwise would result to either one of them being fired by the agency, if not both. They were talented, yes, and had promising futures, but the agency saw their feelings as a hindrance to their blossoming careers. You need to pave your own way for now, get the other out of your system. Maybe in the future, when you're both more mature, maybe then you can work out a compromise with the old man, Tsubasa had told him on the beach when he cried his heart out. His closest senior had stayed with him until dawn broke, had never left even when he ran out of tears to cry. After that he had a talk with the younger one, who apparently had taken the announcement of a debut more harshly than he had. Tomohisa was in tears, clutching onto Takki's shirt and not wanting to show his face to Toma when he and Tsubasa arrived at the Jimusho.
“Pi,” Takki coaxed him, “come on, let go of me and talk to Toma. He's listening.”
A muffled sob. And another. Tomohisa isn't going to let go, but he feels hands prying his own away from Takki's shirt. He finally looks and sees Toma's hands holding his, grip firm and secure, assuring him of their bond. Nothing will change because they can't break us, his hold says. He finally relents on releasing his senpai's abused shirt, but latches onto Toma's arm, engulfing him in a bone-crushing hug.
“He-hey, easy there. I'm not going anywhere.” Toma pats the younger one's back soothingly. His words however, make the other convulse into tears again.
“You're not. I am.” his words are unclear, absorbed into Toma's shoulder, but he doesn't care. He's not letting go. The agency can't take Toma away from him. “I don't want to go. I'm not debuting. Not without you.”
“Stupid,” Toma chuckles, “you can't not want this, alright? This is our dream! We've worked for this for what, seven years? Don't waste it on such nonsense, Tomo.”
“Nonsense?” Tomohisa pushes back, looks incredulously at Toma. “Dream? That's exactly why I don't want to. It's OUR dream, how am I supposed to be happy if we're not together?!”
“Tomohisa, listen to me,” because I don't think I can say this straight to your face again without breaking, he adds, “we've worked our asses off for this chance ever since we saw each other. This is the start of something great, for you at least. We'll both have lots of offers one day, you just have dibs on the first one, okay? Do it for me-- no, do it for us. Jun, Shunsuke, and I have our hopes in you. Even Jimmy wishes you luck.” He smiles at Tomohisa, eyes determined with a new flame of passion. He needs to be strong, for both of them. If Tomohisa breaks under all the pressure, he'll be there to catch him. He'd protect him with every ounce of his being, and one day they'll conquer all these obstacles. One day, he reminds himself, one day they can stand next to each other again.
“O-okay.” Tomohisa can't help but agree. He trusts Toma, trusts the older one with all of him, knows that of all people, Toma will never let him down, will always break his fall. He takes courage in Toma's words and his smile. “Okay, I'll debut. Anything to make you happy, Toma.” He smiles unsurely.
His hand finds Tomohisa's cheek, which he caresses lovingly. “That's the Tomohisa I know.” And he smiles back. “Don't worry”, he tries to lighten up the mood, “I've seen the list of your members, it seems Ryo-chan is there as well. You'll make new friends, yeah? Just don't scare the other juniors.”
“Ehem”, Takizawa interrupts, earning a hit on the head from Tsubasa, “could the lovers please get a room already? Your juniors are looking at you.” Tsubasa is already suppressing his giggle with his hand.
We'll be okay, they can't break us, Toma thinks. On camera, we might be apart, but when the cameras aren't filming and when the spotlight goes off, we always find our way back to each other.
0.89
Toma tightens his hold on the younger one. They had made that promise years ago, when everything they built together seemed to have crumbled. They made the promise to live for themselves, to find what they were both best at, and meet each other on their way. They were apart in terms of the industry, but their hearts never wavered, never changed faces throughout the years. They were in perfect synch despite the distance they tried to project, and even with Tomohisa's debut with eight other juniors, Toma caught up to him eventually, plays and drama roles being given to the older one, his acting skills being recognized all over the country. How many years has it been? With their careers constantly being leveled-up, time for each other is getting hard to acquire. Rehearsals for plays and concerts, photoshoots, dramas, and movies have them all wrung out and exhausted. Their sleeping habits and diet patterns are always all over the place nowadays, and it isn't really that hard to snap at something even so petty. Still, Toma knows neglecting the other is his fault.
“I've been forgetting you.” He kisses Tomohisa's neck, his hand finding the younger's.
“It's not because you're not babying me anymore, you know.” Tomohisa answers, voice now solid again. He revels into the warmth the older one radiates to him.
“Then tell me, what is it?”
“It's,” he pauses, “you'll think I'm stupid.”
“Try me.”
Tomohisa pouts. No way out now. “I-- I feel like I'm left behind.”
“What?” Toma is clearly shocked, but not one bit amused at the confession.
“You said,” the younger answers, playing with Toma's fingers again, “back then, you said we'd always be together. And you were right, you were always right. We managed to be together even after the debut, hell, even after the suspension. But when NEWS came back, it was-- it was different.”
“How so?” Toma asks, confused.
“You were great. My life was on hold-- well not actually but you get the rough idea-- and you were catching up to me. Before all that jazz it was always you chasing behind me, and we always ALWAYS had time for each other, like nothing had changed except that the public didn't see us together. But after that, you-- you suddenly became a frontliner, a headturner and I was scared. I was scared you'd get sucked in that light and you would go ahead without me anymore. I got paranoid thinking once you were up there you wouldn't look back for me.”
“Tomo--”
“No, let me finish. I tried to match your pace, but I couldn't. You are such a natural at this thing we do, you could become anything as long as you were determined but I-- I'm different Toma. If I lose sight of my original goal I can't come up with a new one, I'd immediately get lost. If-- if I lost you to the industry my world would've stopped. I love my work, but I really can't do anything if I lose you. I'd literally be nothing.” Tomohisa is now silently crying, this being one of his most notable and most practiced skills after countless fights with Toma, but the other knows better.
“You were scared that fame would eat us up, and we'd end up losing each other.” His hand expertly runs over the younger one's face, wiping away the tears running down Tomohisa's cheeks, then stroking his hair. “You got scared of the distance, that's why you wanted to move in?” He receives a nod. “And those terrible moodswings?”
The younger sighs. “I only got jealous because they had their hands all over you. I couldn't even steal a glance and all the others are throwing themselves at you.”
“It's too much, you know. We love each other too much.” He kisses Tomohisa's ear.
“I know. I'm sorry.”
“Tomo, you don't say sorry when you love someone.”
Said Tomo shrugs. “All I know is I haven't seen you properly for so long. We barely talk, and I know our schedules won't get better in the near future. I miss you, really really really miss you.” He kisses the back of Toma's hand. “You haven't even touched me in three months.” He looks down, ashamed. Toma, however, laughs at this.
“On your birthday, I promise.” Tomohisa looks at him and all the older can offer is his childish laugh and a kiss. They both move to stand up, with Tomohisa facing the other and hugging him tightly. Toma settles his hand on the younger's waist, relieved that finally, finally the storm has passed. They share their minute of silence, the unspoken promises of I forgive you and we're alright now hanging in the air. Now the only real issue remaining is Tomohisa moving in, and Toma is about to say something if not for the living room clock showing ten minutes to eleven a.m.
'Yabai!' Making up has taken longer than expected and now he is running late for work. Tomohisa, on the other hand, knows Toma's schedule, and when he sees the clock reminding him of how Toma's manager will surely have a fit, he only says, “we're okay now. Soooo, you're leaving.” He isn't too happy with what's going to happen next.
Toma pushes back and coyly smiles, looks at the younger one with eyes full of love. “Look, I have to go, it's almost eleven already. You know how I hate being late, yes?”, and Tomohisa replies with a forced grunt. “I don't know what time I'll be back, so use this time to think really carefully about what you want. Now if you're still here by the time I'm home, then we'll talk properly about this moving in thing.” He looks at Tomohisa whose eyes are glassy but are staring right back at him intensely. The younger opens his mouth to speak, but Toma beats him to it. “Yes, I understand. No parties, no clubs, no going out, right? I'll be home as soon as we finish work.”
Something in that statement strikes a chord in Tomohisa, an unwritten promise that makes him happy. He pecks the older one's lips affectionately, tightens his hold again, and they stay like that for a few moments, Tomohisa basking in the temporary warmth they are sharing, Toma rubbing soothing circles on the small of his back. The older wonders when the other can fully trust him when he says that he's staying, just like he has been for the past twelve years; wonders when Tomohisa will be able to let him go without that fear of him not returning, because he will always, ALWAYS return home, back to Tomohisa's arms. If you only knew how much I love you, idiot. He looks at his watch, and if he doesn't leave in five minutes his manager will have his head on a plate, so he pries Tomohisa's hands off of him, which proves to be useless.
“Tomo, come on, let go.”
“No.”
“I'll be really late. I don't want my manager to get mad at you.”
“NO.”
“Stubborn ass.” And he hits Tomohisa's butt playfully, earning him a 'hey!' and a whack to the head. But that works because Tomohisa's not hugging him anymore.
“I'm going.” He steps forward and chastely kisses Tomohisa on the lips, and he smiles back at the angelic face beaming at him. The younger sees him off, and he can't resist but place another kiss on those lips, just to remind them both that whatever happened this morning-- the fights, the making up, moving in-- was real. Leaving a smiling Tomohisa behind, Toma silently prays that the younger will be there later when he comes home. Something at the back of his head tells him it won't be long before he-- they decide to move out of the house, anything to make Tomohisa happy.
0.92
He looks at his watch. Three-fifteen. His phone rings, Love Song.
“Moshi moshi?”
“Hey.”
“Hey yourself. Anything wrong?”
“No.” Such arrogance. “I can't call if I miss you?”
A smile up to his ears. “You're not alone. I miss you too. What are you doing?”
A happy face. “Nothing important. So is crank in going okay?”
“Pretty much.” A chuckle. “Would be better if you were here, though. Could use the company.” He scratches the back of his neck unconsciously. “Oh, Manami-chan says hi.”
“Saejima?” His left eyebrow is raised. “Tell her I said good luck.”
“Mmmm.” A pause. “Will you be home when I come back?”
“Maybe, maybe not.” He suppresses a smirk.
“Guess I'll have to find out, ne? But I'll be home late this evening, my female co-stars are asking me out tonight.”
“I don't think you'll even consider that option. I know where you live.” His face sports a proud smile.
“Oh? Really? Do we live together? My wife's really possessive.” He teases, tries to mask the urge to ask the younger one to fetch him now. He misses him, but work goes first.
“I don't know if we live together,” he rides on the joke, resists to tell the older one to come home already, “but your wife and I are good friends. I suggest you go home immediately after filming.” He'll wait. He can always wait, if it's Toma.
“I'll think about it.” The break is over, and he hates long filming hours with only ten minutes of break in between, but he can do nothing about it. “I have to go, director's calling.”
“Oh, okay.” his voice sounds less cheerful. “Take care out there.”
“Mmmm. You too.”
Silence. But the line still isn't dead.
“Hey.”
“Hmmm?” he holds his breathe.
“I love you.” he is hopeful.
His heart is filled with warmth. “Do your best. I love you too.”
Three- twenty nine.
1.00
It is no surprise to Toma when he goes home that night and finds Tomohisa curled up in his bed, Jam hugged closed to his chest. The clock glares 11:45pm at him, and he quietly shuffles about in his room to get his towel, a tank top, and his boxers. He walks carefully to the bathroom and takes a shower-- sleeping with work clothes on is simply unhygienic. Fifteen minutes later and he is ready for bed. He turns on the night light to avoid tripping on the still gathered heap of clothes-- if Tomohisa's staying they should really clean up, that or move out and just live in the younger's apartment. He reaches the bed and playfully pokes the other's chest.
“Mrrrmpfgh.”
“Tadaima.”
Tomohisa stirs, cracks one eye open, and yawns all too cutely, swallowing a supposedly 'okaeri'. When he doesn't move though, Toma frowns and lightly kicks at his feet.
“Tomo. I'm tired.”
“Ngrrrh. So?”
“Move, idiot. That's my bed.” He pouts; he is tired from the filming, and he assumes that the younger just stayed home all day so he shouldn't be that exhausted. “Tomohisa!” he raises his voice, causing the other to grunt and blearily sit up. Tomohisa cuddles Jam-chan a bit, then carefully puts her down on the floor, a couple of disheveled shirts serving as her makeshift bed. He scoots over to the left so that Toma can lie on the bed as well. The older one shakes his head, reaches for the nightlight and turns it off, then goes to bed, his back facing Tomohisa. He is about to drift off when a pair of arms wrap around his waist, and he wriggles a little to make themselves a little more comfortable.
“So.”
“Hmm?”
“You're here.”
“I'm sleepy. Sleep.”
“Well I just had my crank in. I'm exhausted too. Where were you today?”
Tomohisa shuffles a bit, obviously annoyed at being woken up. “Here. We cleaned the kitchen and the other rooms.”
“Oh?”
“Yes. And then our manager called, had to rehearse for the new single.” A yawn. “Or something.”
“So you're tired?”
“Basically yes, but maybe not as much as you.” Tomohisa leans closer to the warmth, his head on Toma's shoulder. “We're both tired, so let's sleep, okay? And no, I'm not moving out, so don't get cranky about having a mess in your room from now on.” Another yawn. “Your bed's too small.”
“I told you, my bed. If you want you can sleep on the couch.”
A smirk from the younger one. “Shut it. This may be your bed, but this,” and he hugs Toma tighter, his next sentence laced with confidence, “this is my Toma, so whatever he owns, I own. Now sleep.”
Toma finds no retort to that one, so he smiles to himself, thinks that maybe after this next drama he can convince the other one to move back with him to Tomohisa's apartment so that their privacy can be granted. He dwells happily on this and turns to face Tomohisa, hands automatically going to the other's chest. He pecks Tomohisa's lips before cuddling with him on the bed, the warmth just enough for the both of them to comfortably fall asleep with. Tonight he is the one who snuggles to the younger one's embrace, he is the one to be babied, and he feels safe, feels that everything is right, feels bliss right in Tomohisa's arms.