Learning To Run
Where to begin, eh? This has been an oddly productive weekend. Aside from schoolwork. But on with the show. This weekend I bought a car, as mentioned in my posts to littlespazz. It is a 1989 Ford Taurus. Her name is Susan.
The name was between Susan or Layla for my first car. This car is obviously not sexy enough to be named Layla, so Susan it is. Long story short, my friend Carolanne isn't too pleased with the choice of name. She seemed to handle it well, though. But I'm not changing the name. It now has a Cheat static cling in one of the windows. I'm convinced that this will help it go faster. I'm hoping this car will last a year or two. Fingers crossed, people. So as I was driving it today, I can't help but feel...responsible. I feel like I'm growing up. I'm entering the real world. And I don't like that. Yes, it's satisfying driving a car I bought myself (well, ok, my brother Chris is going halfsies, but still, my parents aren't covering this). Still, this is in my mind another adult milestone. I don't want to be adult. I don't want to have to car about bills or anything like that. I just want to deal with all that stressful stuff. I don't want to worry. Boo to growing up.
Whine, whine, whine. Growing up is inescapable. That doesn't mean I have to like it. Take Kim's graduation (notice the great segue). I'm happy for her and all. And she certainly seemed happy. I just don't see myself outside of school. She wanted out so bad and seems glad to be done. I never want to be done. Well, not for the foreseeable future anyway. I think my feelings are rooted in my lack of direction. I feel like I'm just rehashing this. I know I've said it before. I just feel so out of place. I really don't know how else to describe it. Yes, I have friends and they're great, I love them, but I still feel as if I just don't belong. I don't feel home. Complain, complain, complain.
So immediately after the graduation, Kim, Chris, Carolanne and myself were standing around talking when this girl comes up to us. It was this girl Marlayne that was in the band with us back in high school. She's apparently a sophomore in college now at Elmhurst (where Kim just graduated from) and she saw us and wanted to say hi. So we said hi and that was that. I was half tempted to talk to her and try and get her phone number or somesuch. I'll admit it, I had a little thing for her in high school. Nothing ever came of it, but hey, such is life. But I thought better of it and took no action. What is it about me and tall girls? *sigh* Note that I'm not saying there's anything wrong with not tall girls. I find myself attracted to the cute not tall girls as well. Just tall girls...I was going to try and make a point here. Something along the lines of how so many people look fondly back at high school. Not me. High school sucked. I met a few good friends, but for the most part, I hated it. I think that those that enjoyed it are just looking through rose colored glasses. Or maybe I just had a really shitty time in high school.
I think that'll conclude my bitching for this time. Take care.
The name was between Susan or Layla for my first car. This car is obviously not sexy enough to be named Layla, so Susan it is. Long story short, my friend Carolanne isn't too pleased with the choice of name. She seemed to handle it well, though. But I'm not changing the name. It now has a Cheat static cling in one of the windows. I'm convinced that this will help it go faster. I'm hoping this car will last a year or two. Fingers crossed, people. So as I was driving it today, I can't help but feel...responsible. I feel like I'm growing up. I'm entering the real world. And I don't like that. Yes, it's satisfying driving a car I bought myself (well, ok, my brother Chris is going halfsies, but still, my parents aren't covering this). Still, this is in my mind another adult milestone. I don't want to be adult. I don't want to have to car about bills or anything like that. I just want to deal with all that stressful stuff. I don't want to worry. Boo to growing up.
Whine, whine, whine. Growing up is inescapable. That doesn't mean I have to like it. Take Kim's graduation (notice the great segue). I'm happy for her and all. And she certainly seemed happy. I just don't see myself outside of school. She wanted out so bad and seems glad to be done. I never want to be done. Well, not for the foreseeable future anyway. I think my feelings are rooted in my lack of direction. I feel like I'm just rehashing this. I know I've said it before. I just feel so out of place. I really don't know how else to describe it. Yes, I have friends and they're great, I love them, but I still feel as if I just don't belong. I don't feel home. Complain, complain, complain.
So immediately after the graduation, Kim, Chris, Carolanne and myself were standing around talking when this girl comes up to us. It was this girl Marlayne that was in the band with us back in high school. She's apparently a sophomore in college now at Elmhurst (where Kim just graduated from) and she saw us and wanted to say hi. So we said hi and that was that. I was half tempted to talk to her and try and get her phone number or somesuch. I'll admit it, I had a little thing for her in high school. Nothing ever came of it, but hey, such is life. But I thought better of it and took no action. What is it about me and tall girls? *sigh* Note that I'm not saying there's anything wrong with not tall girls. I find myself attracted to the cute not tall girls as well. Just tall girls...I was going to try and make a point here. Something along the lines of how so many people look fondly back at high school. Not me. High school sucked. I met a few good friends, but for the most part, I hated it. I think that those that enjoyed it are just looking through rose colored glasses. Or maybe I just had a really shitty time in high school.
I think that'll conclude my bitching for this time. Take care.