Once more into the void
And it happens again. For some reason, I'm extremely depressed tonight. As far as I can tell, there's no cause. Things in my life are going pretty well. Sure a few things can be improved, but overall I'm better off than I was a year ago. It's just suddenly I've been cast deep into a dark pit of despair. I really just want to curl up in my bed and cry and the only reason I'm not yet doing so is I still need to study a bit for my English test. But after that it's definitely an option.
I think a large part of it is that I just feel unfulfilled. So many of my friends are seniors. They're graduating, they're making plans for the future. I've got nothing. I don't really want anything. It's like in Office Space. If I had a million dollars, besides doing two chicks at once, I'd do absolutely nothing. And I'd likely enjoy it. And yet in this time and place that just isn't feasible. I'm told to have a plan. I need to start thinking about the future. I don't want any of that. I'd like to just retreat into my little fantasy world in my head where everything makes sense and I'm happy, but that just isn't possible.
And so here I am. Twenty-one. Trying to get two degrees in college. No desire to do anything with my life. Why the hell am I stuck in this rut? I know I've posted something to the effect of this entry before. Why the hell does this keep happening? Why the fuck can't I be happy for a moment just like everyone else?
Grar.
I think a large part of it is that I just feel unfulfilled. So many of my friends are seniors. They're graduating, they're making plans for the future. I've got nothing. I don't really want anything. It's like in Office Space. If I had a million dollars, besides doing two chicks at once, I'd do absolutely nothing. And I'd likely enjoy it. And yet in this time and place that just isn't feasible. I'm told to have a plan. I need to start thinking about the future. I don't want any of that. I'd like to just retreat into my little fantasy world in my head where everything makes sense and I'm happy, but that just isn't possible.
And so here I am. Twenty-one. Trying to get two degrees in college. No desire to do anything with my life. Why the hell am I stuck in this rut? I know I've posted something to the effect of this entry before. Why the hell does this keep happening? Why the fuck can't I be happy for a moment just like everyone else?
Grar.