Lois took a deep breath to give Lex a piece of her mind, but thought the better of it when Helga pulled a nine millimeter out of Martha's utility drawer
( Read more... )
I would like to tackle the first part of that - bringing Bruce to the farm - unless you have something already written? If you do, never mind *G*.
I was thinking that Bruce would show up with Alfred (as a side note, I think Alfred is going to be fascinated with Helga), and then all kinds of havoc would break loose. In the midst of that, Clark will have another attack of some sort - more severe than just fainting. Lex has never seen anything give Clark physical pain except meteor rocks, and so this is going to be agonizing for him (Lex is just a natural protector. If Julian had lived, he would've been 17 and going "Leeeeexx, I CAN cross the street by myself!").
An Email Goes Out To Bruce Wayne...emrinalexanderSeptember 1 2005, 14:48:59 UTC
FROM: CKL@luthor_kent.org TO: BW@waynefoundation.org SUBJECT: Whatever You Are Doing, DROP IT NOW
Bruce,
I hate to bother you, but I'm having some really weird health problems and I was wondering i....
NEVER MIND THAT. GET YOUR ASS IN THE AIR AND GET TO CLARK'S MOTHER'S PLACE NOW.
Sorry about that, Bruce, Lex is a little upset. But, yeh, if you would't mind coming down to Smallville right away and bringing Alfr....
OH FOR ... JUST DO IT.
Lex, get away from the keypad NOW if you ever want to have sex again. And...OUCH...believe me, I'm still got that under review! Sorry, Bruce, it's just that Lex isn't used to seeing me sick, and it is kind of scar...
NOW. OR I HAVE SIX LITTLE WORDS FOR YOU BRUCE : EXCELSIOR PREP FIFTH GRADE PLAY VIDEO. NO, YOU DIDN'T DESTROY THEM ALL. I HAVE THE VIDEO MY MOM MADE AND I WILL USE IT. NEED I SAY MORE?
Re: An Email Goes Out To Bruce Wayne...kyanoswolfSeptember 1 2005, 15:44:57 UTC
NOW. OR I HAVE SIX LITTLE WORDS FOR YOU BRUCE : EXCELSIOR PREP FIFTH GRADE PLAY VIDEO. NO, YOU DIDN'T DESTROY THEM ALL. I HAVE THE VIDEO MY MOM MADE AND I WILL USE IT. NEED I SAY MORE?
OH. MY. GOD.
Lex has Bruce in incriminating video and its not porn. *snicker* It's fifth grade school play bwhahahahahahahah!!!!!! I do hope that Bruce was dressed as something incredibly silly such as Little Miss Muffet. *snerk*
Re: An Email Goes Out To Bruce Wayne...emrinalexanderSeptember 1 2005, 18:04:22 UTC
I draw on real life *G*. Dominic was briefly incarcerated (in s6th grade) at the Long Beach Unified School District's Elementary School For the Performing Arts. He played Tweedle Dum in their end of the year boffo performance of "Alice In Wonderland" . We thought he was cute, but apparently this was THE most embarrassing moment of his life because during his speech, he Tweedle Dummed right off the edge of the stage.
I have the only known video of the play locked away in a fireproof home safe in our bedroom. MUAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHA - I plan to use it too.
So, I thought why not let Lex use it on Bruce *G*?
"What We Need," Lex explained, "Is a fast ride..." Part 1emrinalexanderSeptember 5 2005, 14:45:02 UTC
Bruce Wayne read his email through for the third time, sighed and erased it.
"Alfred?"
"Yes, Master Bruce?"
"You and I are taking the fast route and going to Smallville immediately."
"A problem with Master Clark and Master Lex?"
"Clark's having a health problem of some kind and they've requested our help. We can't refuse - Clark has come to my aid far too many times in the past. Besides, Lex is an old friend. Of sorts."
"Very good, sir. Ten minutes?"
Bruce nodded. "I'll meet you in the cave."
****** "So," Martha prodded the chicken she was basting, "the teleporter in the caves doesn't work?"
"It started up," Lex saw her wince as she started to pick up the heavy roasting pan. Quickly, he reached around her, grabbed hot pads, and gracefully placed the roasting pan back in the oven, "and then it went spppplllllleerrrrrp pffffft!'"
"Oh."
Clark ambled into the kitchen. "I'm hungry. Lex - are you practicing funny noises for the baby?"
"No, smart ass, I'm telling Mom about the teleporter."
Re: "What We Need," Lex explained, "Is a fast ride..." Part 2lastscorpionSeptember 5 2005, 17:58:20 UTC
This story is adorable! I especially loved the way Martha, Helga and Alfred were all scolding the guys, and Martha was scolding Lex, and Helga was scolding Clark. So cute!
Re: "What We Need," Lex explained, "Is a fast ride..." Part 2kyanoswolfSeptember 5 2005, 18:11:12 UTC
It is actually is pretty much canon that Alfred scolds Bruce. Martha's always taken Clark to task. Lex couldn't be left in the cold with no one to be his conscience.
In this case, they all seem to take care of all of them.
Re: "What We Need," Lex explained, "Is a fast ride..." Part 2supercaptain182September 5 2005, 19:21:57 UTC
Women always know what is best. Could you imagine Lois watching the whole scene where these big powerful guys are being scolded my sweet old women! My God, I would die laughing along with Lois.
Re: "What We Need," Lex explained, "Is a fast ride..." Part 2kyanoswolfSeptember 5 2005, 19:27:59 UTC
Fortunately, Lois is on a very uncomfortable plane ride back to China. She's not about to get any more ammunition on Clark. As a matter of fact she didn't get any confirmation of her suspicions at all.
Reply
Reply
I was thinking that Bruce would show up with Alfred (as a side note, I think Alfred is going to be fascinated with Helga), and then all kinds of havoc would break loose. In the midst of that, Clark will have another attack of some sort - more severe than just fainting. Lex has never seen anything give Clark physical pain except meteor rocks, and so this is going to be agonizing for him (Lex is just a natural protector. If Julian had lived, he would've been 17 and going "Leeeeexx, I CAN cross the street by myself!").
Reply
I love that idea.
Lex is scared of the pain Clark's in and in a bit of a dither. Conner's just such an active fetus.
(a little red solar radiation would solve the problem.)
Reply
TO: BW@waynefoundation.org
SUBJECT: Whatever You Are Doing, DROP IT NOW
Bruce,
I hate to bother you, but I'm having some really weird health problems and I was wondering i....
NEVER MIND THAT. GET YOUR ASS IN THE AIR AND GET TO CLARK'S MOTHER'S PLACE NOW.
Sorry about that, Bruce, Lex is a little upset. But, yeh, if you would't mind coming down to Smallville right away and bringing Alfr....
OH FOR ... JUST DO IT.
Lex, get away from the keypad NOW if you ever want to have sex again. And...OUCH...believe me, I'm still got that under review! Sorry, Bruce, it's just that Lex isn't used to seeing me sick, and it is kind of scar...
NOW. OR I HAVE SIX LITTLE WORDS FOR YOU BRUCE : EXCELSIOR PREP FIFTH GRADE PLAY VIDEO. NO, YOU DIDN'T DESTROY THEM ALL. I HAVE THE VIDEO MY MOM MADE AND I WILL USE IT. NEED I SAY MORE?
LEX
Reply
OH. MY. GOD.
Lex has Bruce in incriminating video and its not porn. *snicker* It's fifth grade school play bwhahahahahahahah!!!!!!
I do hope that Bruce was dressed as something incredibly silly such as Little Miss Muffet. *snerk*
Reply
I have the only known video of the play locked away in a fireproof home safe in our bedroom. MUAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHA - I plan to use it too.
So, I thought why not let Lex use it on Bruce *G*?
Reply
"Alfred?"
"Yes, Master Bruce?"
"You and I are taking the fast route and going to Smallville immediately."
"A problem with Master Clark and Master Lex?"
"Clark's having a health problem of some kind and they've requested our help. We can't refuse - Clark has come to my aid far too many times in the past. Besides, Lex is an old friend. Of sorts."
"Very good, sir. Ten minutes?"
Bruce nodded. "I'll meet you in the cave."
******
"So," Martha prodded the chicken she was basting, "the teleporter in the caves doesn't work?"
"It started up," Lex saw her wince as she started to pick up the heavy roasting pan. Quickly, he reached around her, grabbed hot pads, and gracefully placed the roasting pan back in the oven, "and then it went spppplllllleerrrrrp pffffft!'"
"Oh."
Clark ambled into the kitchen. "I'm hungry. Lex - are you practicing funny noises for the baby?"
"No, smart ass, I'm telling Mom about the teleporter."
"Ah! It was more of a ' ( ... )
Reply
Reply
(The comment has been removed)
Yeah, the boys are pretty whipped.
Believe me, Lex has thought of posting that video, but then it would lose its blackmail value.
Reply
Reply
In this case, they all seem to take care of all of them.
Reply
Reply
Reply
I think he played Buttercup in the all-boy production of "HMS Pinafore."
*EG*
Reply
Leave a comment