[flist hearts] seasons are weird and I miss them
Today I very officially told the people who need to know that I'm not staying in Thailand for a third year. This decision makes me inconsolably angry in ways that I can't hardly explain.( cut for general frustration and cathartic bitching )
*squish*
My hopes are on Korea - but if that doesn't work either, that's okay. I'll just keep moving until I find a place where I feel like I can tread water without fear of drowning.
mainly because I was an asshole pretentious teenager
BASICALLY THIS. Bella would like that about you.
And for awhile, it was pretty easy to hate given how Twilight was general awful and abusive and terrible in a lot of legit ways.
This wounds me daily. Most Narratives do.
And you're right, Twilight isn't for adults, but for teenage girls. And sometimes I worry about that, and the messages Twilight projects, but at the same time, the stuff teen girls like get so much shit all the time, get dismissed or mocked. Protect teenage girls at all costs, tbh.
BASICALLY THIS.
I used to say with regal superiority that I wouldn't let my hypothetical future daughter read these books ever. But I hope they want to and do. Or whatever. I hope my future kids read whatever the hell they want and let me read it with them and talk to them about it. Because the problem with Twilight isn't that it's any worse than any other narrative directed at teenage girls.
The point is to cherish and love and protect them at all costs. And if that means learning to love Bella - that's more than worth it.
but I've seen so many people talk about this FEMALE CHARACTER IS USELESS OR WORTHLESS and I just wanna stab someone
#aboutme
Babe. Listen. I had so much bravado about being ~alone on Christmas. And then every single one of my American coworkers left together today without saying a word to me. And I nearly broke. And then I traveled all over the city and the theatre I went out of my way to get to didn't even have the film I wanted to see. And I nearly broke. And then I took myself to dinner and read alone and felt... good. Like I finally just fessed up to the fact that I'd rather be alone than with people who make me miserable. Which is comforting in a way.
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