A bittersweet friendship!

[kwbutter]

So today, I actually went back to my choir with a friend I haven't seen or spoken to in about two months! It was the weirdest feeling ever..I feel like I was riding in the car with a stranger..and I didn't even know how to act or what to talk about!! It wasn't so easy to just open up like I used to about boys, life, friends, or any random thing..things have defenatly changed in out lives..and it's totally obvious!! This could be a new begin to our friendship AGAIN..but I have the feeling it will never be the same..it won't compare to what it once was..it's a bittersweet feeling..I miss the old friendship, the laughs, the hugs, the cries, the hanging out, the fighting and making u, the long talks, and the simple advice..all the stuff that makes a good solid friendship..I MISS it..But now, it just doesn't feel right..it feels out of place, I feel out of place!! For the past month maybe I got used to not having that kind of friendship with a person..it made me a stronger person..it made me a sad person, it made me a happy person..but I think I learned a lot and it helped me grow and learn about life and friendships!! Walking back into choir tonight and seeing all my friends, asking me where I have been if I was ok..they missed me and were worried..It was a good feeling to have that many people care about me and show they care..but I feel like I let them down and I know what i need to do to make it up to them..I feel guilt, for not being there for 2 months!!

I miss my mom..weird as that may sound! But i cant wait until she comes back home!!! I miss a lot of things..