Give me a new year
Title: Give me a new year
Pairing: Akame
Genre: Angst, Romance
Rating: PG
Disclaimer: People can't own other people. Well, except for Johnny Kitagawa-san...
Summary: It’s New Year but Kame has nothing to celebrate.
A/N: English's not my mother language.
Give me a new year
“KAT-TUN” says one of the many uchiwas in the crowd. Every letter of the group’s name is in a different color. Six different colors. Kame snorts, then smiles bitterly. He would like to go down there and tell that fan that now KAT-TUN has only five colors. Because KAT-TUN now has only five members.
Instead, he looks away and concentrates on the song that’s just about to start. He sings the first two lines of “Real Face”, unconsciously hoping that the voice that responds will be his voice. But obviously he hears Junno’s and Ueda’s voices. Kame hides another bitter smile. Of course it would be their voices. They’re the ones who sing that part of the song now.
When it’s almost midnight all the Johnny’s at the concert gather together on the stage. Kame looks at the crowd, then around him. His four band-mates give him comforting looks and not far from him Yamapi nods at him.
It reminds Kame of this same day four years ago. KAT-TUN were five at that time too. But this time is different. Last time he had promised to come back. This time he didn't promise anything. And even if he had, Kame probably wouldn't have believed him.
When it’s midnight and everybody shouts “Happy New Year” Kame has to try hard not to snort and laugh in their face. As things stand now, he doesn’t think there’s anything to celebrate. The New Year will just mean work for the five of them. And a new world tour that will revolve around the number five. The more time passes the more Kame hates that number. KAT-TUN’s number should be six. Six letters, six initials, six names, six people, six members.
Someone pats him on the shoulder and Kame turns to see Koki, who’s pushing him towards the center of the stage. Kame grabs his microphone and starts to sing the next song. He acts like a robot and just mimics the same actions repeated over and over during rehearsals.
When it’s all over Kame mentally thanks God and rushes backstage, absently greeting his coworkers and the juniors that shyly say “Happy New Year”. He reaches his dressing room and changes. When the rest of KAT-TUN come back, Kame’s ready to leave. He says goodbye, pretending not to see his band-mates worried looks, and exits.
He walks quickly through the corridors and to his ears comes the laughter of the staff and the other performers. He doesn’t care about the party. He won’t celebrate with them or with anyone else. He just wants to reach the comforting loneliness of his apartment, as partners only his bed, a warm blanket and maybe a DVD.
Finally he reaches the exit of Tokyo Dome and he searches in his pocket for the keys of his car. He gets out through the revolving door and breathes in the cold air of the night.
But he’s barely taken a couple of steps outside that two strong arms suddenly encircles him from behind. Kame stops, standing still. Then he notices the ring on the hand that’s resting on his chest and immediately relaxes against the firm and familiar body.
“Happy New Year.” a well-known deep voice whispers.
“Happy New Year.” Kame replies, not really convinced.
The other man kisses his bare neck and Kame shivers.
“You should wear a scarf or you’ll catch a cold.”
“Would take care of me if I did?” Kame whispers back, surprising himself with the soppiness of his own words.
“I prefer you healthy. But of course, I’d take care of you.”
“Liar.” Kame replies, calm but firm.
He feels the other’s body simmer a little, but no word is spoken. Kame just feels the strong arms hugging him tighter.
“Kazu…”
Kame doesn’t reply, just leans his head back on the other’s collarbone. The latter leans his check against Kame’s.
“Kazu, you’re cold. Let’s go.”
“Where?” Kame asks, not making any effort to move.
“Where do you want to go?” the man asks with a smile.
“I don’t care.”
The other sighs, places another kiss on his neck and pulls away to take his hand and lead him to the car. Kame passes the other the keys and holds his hand tightly.
Kame waits as his partner opens the door of his apartment and steps aside to let him enter. They take off their shoes and jackets and head for the living room. Kame plops down on the couch.
“Let’s drink something.” the other says, standing behind the couch and hugging him, his chin leaning on Kame’s head.
“What do you want to drink?” the latter asks.
“Champagne?” he laughs “Since it’s New Year.”
“Like we have something to celebrate.”
“You don’t have to be always this apathetic, you know, Kazuya?” the man replies, his tone harsher.
“I simply have nothing to celebrate, Jin.”
Jin sighs and lets go. He goes to the kitchen and comes back with two glasses of water. He hands one to Kame and sits beside him.
“Water?” the younger boy asks, looking at his glass “How plain.”
“You’re the one who didn’t want to celebrate. And besides there’s nothing in your fridge. Do you even live in this apartment?” he takes a look around “There’s nothing out of place. And I don’t think you have much time to tidy up.”
“Just because you’re so messy it doesn’t mean other people can’t be neat.”
Jin laughs. Kame shakes his head.
“What is it?” Jin asks.
“You really should become tidier. You’re 26!”
Jin laughs again, puts down his glass, encircles Kame’s shoulders with an arm and whispers in his ear.
“Move in with me and I’ll become the tidiest man on earth.”
Kame’s eyes open wide and he turns to Jin.
“What?”
“Move in with me. My apartment’s far too big for me alone and I hate not seeing you for days.”
“Not my fault.” Kame replies, harsh.
“Kazu…”
“Not my fault. You decided to leave on your own.”
“Kazuya. We have already had this conversation.”
Kame looks away. He knows very well. They’ve been having this conversation since Jin decided to go solo in America. And they still haven’t come to a conclusion. Actually, they can’t even say they’ve tried. Every time they discuss it’s just a mutual blaming. And the end never satisfies either of them. Sometimes it’s Jin who says he’ll give up his work in America; but Kame sees the sadness in his eyes and has to cheer him up, telling him to continue. Some other times it’s Kame who says it’s alright, they’ll learn to deal with a distant-relationship; but they both know it’s a lie.
“Kazu…”
“What?”
Jin’s arms encircle him again. Kame tries to pull away but he doesn’t have enough strength.
He looks at Jin’s hand and sees the ring again. It’s a present he gave Jin years ago. Kame has an identical ring; he can feel it against his chest, hanging from the plain chain around his neck.
“We’ll find a way.” Jin says after a bit.
“How? We’ve been trying to find a way for months, for years maybe, but we’ve still got nothing!”
“No, we’ve not been trying. We can’t find a solution if we don’t accept the problem first.”
“What?!”
“Think about it. Neither of us has really accepted all this. You’re still blaming me for leaving KAT-TUN and I’m always wondering if this is the right choice.”
Kame has to nod, knowing it is the truth.
“Maybe if we accept things as they are, we’ll be able to succeed.” Jin finishes, kissing Kame’s forehead.
“You’re telling me to give up and face the fact that you’re going to be an American star and that we’re going to be apart most of the time?”
“I know it’s difficult. You’re the main reason why I waited so long before deciding to go solo. But I couldn’t stay. Japan alone wasn’t enough for me.”
“KAT-TUN wasn’t enough for you.” Kame says. But there’s no resentment or blame in his words.
“KAT-TUN’s my starting point but just the Jimusho is too small of a world for me.”
Kame finally hugs him too, his arms around Jin’s waist.
“I always knew you weren’t meant to perform in Tokyo Dome, dressed up as a pirate, like the rest of us.”
Jin laughs softly.
“I enjoyed that part.” he says sincerely.
“But you’re made for wider stages and wider audiences. You won’t find peace until the entire world sees you.”
“Yeah, probably.”
“You can’t ask me to accept all this.” Kame says, looking at Jin in the eyes “Not all together.”
“I’m not asking you this.” he pauses “Let’s make it our New Year’s resolution to learn to accept things.”
Kame stays silent, thinking. Then he nods.
Jin smiles like a child and Kame can’t help but smile too. It’s the first real smile in who knows how long. Jin can make him so sad that he can’t smile even with his friends. It’s so ironical that Jin is also the one that can make him smile anytime, no matter how difficult the situation is.
Kame’s smiling sincerely, his eyes reflecting in Jin’s, their faces one in front of the other. And Jin can’t let the opportunity go. He closes the distance and kisses his boyfriend. Kame kisses back and this time it’s him who pulls Jin closer.
Kame’s first night of the year is as he imagined it. There’s his bed, there’s the warm blanket and there’s the DVD of an old film. The only difference is that Kame’s not alone. More than the blanket, which is objectively too small for two people, it’s Jin who keeps him warm, slowly caressing his body and occasionally placing kisses on his lips or on any little bit of bare skin he can find.
Kame still hasn’t got anything to celebrate but this 2011 won’t be about celebrations. He will have to work hard. Luckily, he’s not alone.
#OWARI#
This is because I wanted to write a fic for the end of the year and I also wanted to write an Akame.
And because for me Jin remains KAT-TUN’s A.
I hope you liked it! ^-^
And feel free to comment if you have some time… XD
Happy New Year!!!
Pairing: Akame
Genre: Angst, Romance
Rating: PG
Disclaimer: People can't own other people. Well, except for Johnny Kitagawa-san...
Summary: It’s New Year but Kame has nothing to celebrate.
A/N: English's not my mother language.
Give me a new year
“KAT-TUN” says one of the many uchiwas in the crowd. Every letter of the group’s name is in a different color. Six different colors. Kame snorts, then smiles bitterly. He would like to go down there and tell that fan that now KAT-TUN has only five colors. Because KAT-TUN now has only five members.
Instead, he looks away and concentrates on the song that’s just about to start. He sings the first two lines of “Real Face”, unconsciously hoping that the voice that responds will be his voice. But obviously he hears Junno’s and Ueda’s voices. Kame hides another bitter smile. Of course it would be their voices. They’re the ones who sing that part of the song now.
When it’s almost midnight all the Johnny’s at the concert gather together on the stage. Kame looks at the crowd, then around him. His four band-mates give him comforting looks and not far from him Yamapi nods at him.
It reminds Kame of this same day four years ago. KAT-TUN were five at that time too. But this time is different. Last time he had promised to come back. This time he didn't promise anything. And even if he had, Kame probably wouldn't have believed him.
When it’s midnight and everybody shouts “Happy New Year” Kame has to try hard not to snort and laugh in their face. As things stand now, he doesn’t think there’s anything to celebrate. The New Year will just mean work for the five of them. And a new world tour that will revolve around the number five. The more time passes the more Kame hates that number. KAT-TUN’s number should be six. Six letters, six initials, six names, six people, six members.
Someone pats him on the shoulder and Kame turns to see Koki, who’s pushing him towards the center of the stage. Kame grabs his microphone and starts to sing the next song. He acts like a robot and just mimics the same actions repeated over and over during rehearsals.
When it’s all over Kame mentally thanks God and rushes backstage, absently greeting his coworkers and the juniors that shyly say “Happy New Year”. He reaches his dressing room and changes. When the rest of KAT-TUN come back, Kame’s ready to leave. He says goodbye, pretending not to see his band-mates worried looks, and exits.
He walks quickly through the corridors and to his ears comes the laughter of the staff and the other performers. He doesn’t care about the party. He won’t celebrate with them or with anyone else. He just wants to reach the comforting loneliness of his apartment, as partners only his bed, a warm blanket and maybe a DVD.
Finally he reaches the exit of Tokyo Dome and he searches in his pocket for the keys of his car. He gets out through the revolving door and breathes in the cold air of the night.
But he’s barely taken a couple of steps outside that two strong arms suddenly encircles him from behind. Kame stops, standing still. Then he notices the ring on the hand that’s resting on his chest and immediately relaxes against the firm and familiar body.
“Happy New Year.” a well-known deep voice whispers.
“Happy New Year.” Kame replies, not really convinced.
The other man kisses his bare neck and Kame shivers.
“You should wear a scarf or you’ll catch a cold.”
“Would take care of me if I did?” Kame whispers back, surprising himself with the soppiness of his own words.
“I prefer you healthy. But of course, I’d take care of you.”
“Liar.” Kame replies, calm but firm.
He feels the other’s body simmer a little, but no word is spoken. Kame just feels the strong arms hugging him tighter.
“Kazu…”
Kame doesn’t reply, just leans his head back on the other’s collarbone. The latter leans his check against Kame’s.
“Kazu, you’re cold. Let’s go.”
“Where?” Kame asks, not making any effort to move.
“Where do you want to go?” the man asks with a smile.
“I don’t care.”
The other sighs, places another kiss on his neck and pulls away to take his hand and lead him to the car. Kame passes the other the keys and holds his hand tightly.
Kame waits as his partner opens the door of his apartment and steps aside to let him enter. They take off their shoes and jackets and head for the living room. Kame plops down on the couch.
“Let’s drink something.” the other says, standing behind the couch and hugging him, his chin leaning on Kame’s head.
“What do you want to drink?” the latter asks.
“Champagne?” he laughs “Since it’s New Year.”
“Like we have something to celebrate.”
“You don’t have to be always this apathetic, you know, Kazuya?” the man replies, his tone harsher.
“I simply have nothing to celebrate, Jin.”
Jin sighs and lets go. He goes to the kitchen and comes back with two glasses of water. He hands one to Kame and sits beside him.
“Water?” the younger boy asks, looking at his glass “How plain.”
“You’re the one who didn’t want to celebrate. And besides there’s nothing in your fridge. Do you even live in this apartment?” he takes a look around “There’s nothing out of place. And I don’t think you have much time to tidy up.”
“Just because you’re so messy it doesn’t mean other people can’t be neat.”
Jin laughs. Kame shakes his head.
“What is it?” Jin asks.
“You really should become tidier. You’re 26!”
Jin laughs again, puts down his glass, encircles Kame’s shoulders with an arm and whispers in his ear.
“Move in with me and I’ll become the tidiest man on earth.”
Kame’s eyes open wide and he turns to Jin.
“What?”
“Move in with me. My apartment’s far too big for me alone and I hate not seeing you for days.”
“Not my fault.” Kame replies, harsh.
“Kazu…”
“Not my fault. You decided to leave on your own.”
“Kazuya. We have already had this conversation.”
Kame looks away. He knows very well. They’ve been having this conversation since Jin decided to go solo in America. And they still haven’t come to a conclusion. Actually, they can’t even say they’ve tried. Every time they discuss it’s just a mutual blaming. And the end never satisfies either of them. Sometimes it’s Jin who says he’ll give up his work in America; but Kame sees the sadness in his eyes and has to cheer him up, telling him to continue. Some other times it’s Kame who says it’s alright, they’ll learn to deal with a distant-relationship; but they both know it’s a lie.
“Kazu…”
“What?”
Jin’s arms encircle him again. Kame tries to pull away but he doesn’t have enough strength.
He looks at Jin’s hand and sees the ring again. It’s a present he gave Jin years ago. Kame has an identical ring; he can feel it against his chest, hanging from the plain chain around his neck.
“We’ll find a way.” Jin says after a bit.
“How? We’ve been trying to find a way for months, for years maybe, but we’ve still got nothing!”
“No, we’ve not been trying. We can’t find a solution if we don’t accept the problem first.”
“What?!”
“Think about it. Neither of us has really accepted all this. You’re still blaming me for leaving KAT-TUN and I’m always wondering if this is the right choice.”
Kame has to nod, knowing it is the truth.
“Maybe if we accept things as they are, we’ll be able to succeed.” Jin finishes, kissing Kame’s forehead.
“You’re telling me to give up and face the fact that you’re going to be an American star and that we’re going to be apart most of the time?”
“I know it’s difficult. You’re the main reason why I waited so long before deciding to go solo. But I couldn’t stay. Japan alone wasn’t enough for me.”
“KAT-TUN wasn’t enough for you.” Kame says. But there’s no resentment or blame in his words.
“KAT-TUN’s my starting point but just the Jimusho is too small of a world for me.”
Kame finally hugs him too, his arms around Jin’s waist.
“I always knew you weren’t meant to perform in Tokyo Dome, dressed up as a pirate, like the rest of us.”
Jin laughs softly.
“I enjoyed that part.” he says sincerely.
“But you’re made for wider stages and wider audiences. You won’t find peace until the entire world sees you.”
“Yeah, probably.”
“You can’t ask me to accept all this.” Kame says, looking at Jin in the eyes “Not all together.”
“I’m not asking you this.” he pauses “Let’s make it our New Year’s resolution to learn to accept things.”
Kame stays silent, thinking. Then he nods.
Jin smiles like a child and Kame can’t help but smile too. It’s the first real smile in who knows how long. Jin can make him so sad that he can’t smile even with his friends. It’s so ironical that Jin is also the one that can make him smile anytime, no matter how difficult the situation is.
Kame’s smiling sincerely, his eyes reflecting in Jin’s, their faces one in front of the other. And Jin can’t let the opportunity go. He closes the distance and kisses his boyfriend. Kame kisses back and this time it’s him who pulls Jin closer.
Kame’s first night of the year is as he imagined it. There’s his bed, there’s the warm blanket and there’s the DVD of an old film. The only difference is that Kame’s not alone. More than the blanket, which is objectively too small for two people, it’s Jin who keeps him warm, slowly caressing his body and occasionally placing kisses on his lips or on any little bit of bare skin he can find.
Kame still hasn’t got anything to celebrate but this 2011 won’t be about celebrations. He will have to work hard. Luckily, he’s not alone.
#OWARI#
This is because I wanted to write a fic for the end of the year and I also wanted to write an Akame.
And because for me Jin remains KAT-TUN’s A.
I hope you liked it! ^-^
And feel free to comment if you have some time… XD
Happy New Year!!!