life
well for the first part of the day and a few other random times I was in a really really good mood believe it or not and i was really hyper to but of course that changed and i became my usual boring unhappy moody unfun self it all started with findin a very unpleasant email that really got me upset and hurt me then because i was so upset it ruined my entire day o and im still upset bout it o and the best part is cuz my day was ruined i got in the biggest fight with my mom it was so bad she took my door off the hinges and she called me a bitch 100 times and idk what my problem was i honestly just didn’t care i started fuckin laughing lol that really pissed me off then she’s like " o ya Katie act all tough like it doesn’t bug u but ull be crying ur eyes out latter" and guess what i didn’t fuckin cry once i fuckin went to bed lol well she’s pissed and wont talk to me o she wanted all my pws to my accounts and i refused to give them to her so i probly wont be usin the computer during the day 4 a while but w/e all my moms been talkin bout is how im depressed and shit but w/e i really dont care nemore well this is awesome me and Christian are fuckin fightin again my life just cant get any fuckin better mayb i wouldn’t be such a bitch w him if it wasnt for that fuckin email well it doesn’t matter hell just go to Alicia now and shell make it all better 4 him cuz she always does so he really doesn’t need me but w/e anywho fuckin Howard called me ( my biological parent that i fuckin hate beyond all belief) i havent herd from him in like 5 months and he finally fuckin calls then give me the gayest excuse bout how he doesn’t call cuz he doesn’t want to bug me and im like wtf are you talkin about you never call then he tried the gay excuse again and im like well you could call once a fuckin month so now he supposedly goin to call every week i highly doubt that every fuckin week my ass i fuckin hate him what kind of person fuckin leaves his girlfriend after he finds out she’s pregnant with his kid with out even sayin goodbye then comes back 7 fuckin years later and tells her he left cuz his fuckin mommy made him and cuz he needed to go to college fucker well he can kiss my ass he just expects me to forgive him and be like o daddy but fuck that hell never hear those words out of my mouth and i sure as hell am not callin him dad hes not my dad at all he missed seven fuckin years of my life hell never get that back and i hope he regrets that every fuckin day and realizes what he could of had if he wasnt such a scared baby who ran away so fuck him i dont need him or his money like the checks he sends or my college funds so he can shove it up his ass the only good thing ill get is all his money when he dies mayb itll b soon if im lucky all he ever says is " katie i hope someday ull want to get to know me ur REAL father" then he signs every card ( the very few i ever get ) with " love YOUR FATHER Howard" i stoped readin them they’re all in a box somewhere right now my dad ( Dennis ) is the only person talkin to me that isnt mad at me or bein an ass to me which is the biggest shock ever but if he finds out bout my mommy and me fightin im so fucked my mom wants me to move out again she’s like ur a pain in my ass im so sick of u u lil bitch fuckin find somewhere to live and im like thank you god id love to and she got pissed off some more u know what i really love is when christian tells me he likes my "best friend" Alicia then tells her that to but then he fuckin compares me to her and tells her all the things she has that i dont like how she comforts him and makes him feel better and how fun she is and such a cool person and how he actually trusts her he never trusted me but guess thats cuz im not alicia so w/e my biggest fear was always that hed fall back in love with her and i should have known it would happen Alicia is like my big sister weve been "best friends" for nine years and she’s always been better then me and everyone always likes her more she got everythin i had wanted every guy every friend everything and i hated her 4 it and im still fuckin jellis of her and she still takes everythin from me i no she doesn’t try to but i do think she likes the idea that christian likes her again and will try somthin with that idk but im so upset right now and pissed off cb just completely signed off on me while im tryin to talk to him so now i feel even more worse i cant talk bout my feelins with anyone hes always like " km u can always talk to me bout nething" then when i really need him he just leaves and doesn’t even make me feel better omg i could so just die right now you dont even know i feel so alone i dont have anyone nemore i have no1 to talk to or nethin and i feel so distant with christian and i cant talk to alicia and i dont know im just soooo fuckin upset pissed off hurt everythin but w/e its not like it matters much right no1 really cares well i think thats it ill write back later bout everythin and i so hope im in a good mood tomorrow i feel really bad cuz i was a real bitch to cb thats y he got off i was a bitch cuz im upset and idk i didn’t want him to leave cuz i just really needed to talk about stuff w him and he just left so ya i hope i can fix things w him later well gots to go write back later byebye