my surface is so tough, i don't think the blade will dig in
do you ever get the feeling that someone's not telling you something?
well i have that at the moment... and i KNOW someone's not telling me whatever it is...
i know it isn't THAT big of a deal, and quite frankly, i'm almost positive that i know what the thing is that he's not talking to me about. i KNOW that if it's the thing that is in the back of my brain, then it ISN'T that big of a deal... just the fact that he's not talking to me about it really gets on my nerves.
i sit as he walks back and forth throughout the house... going from room to room putting stationary and oscilating fans everywhere.
things like this really bother me. when someone is mad at me (or just something about me, or even just having to do with me) i want them to talk to me about it, instead of just going around and when i ask them what is wrong, they say "it's nothing, don't worry about it."
things right now are really frustrating... nothing really having to do with david, or even this living situation; just things that make it hard to do things that don't involve work or getting up in the afternoon.
i want to be able to do things during the day. things outside that require being up before the late afternoon. i don't mean that they have to be extremely physical things like running and jumping into things... just things that normal people do. i really hate waking up only 2 hours before i have to go to work, giving myself only enough time to get ready for the day and eating something. it sucks. i want to be able to hang out with my friends as well... and doing the things that i do now don't allow me to do that.
things with the "friends being older than me" issue have been going well though. i don't complain as much about it cuz i just have to face the fact that i just need to deal with it and shut up.
i'm just tired and i need to get out of here. i know that i've been saying that for a really long time now, but i really do need to do something about it soon.
i had sort of a talk with amber about this the other day. i told her that even though i have all these plans of moving to portland, i still kind of want to stay at least until my birthday. that probably won't happen, since i'll probably go crazy before then. but that's what i want. i want to spend as much time with the little friends that i have and care about here before i go there.
it sounds selfish to me, but that's what i want. i can't stand to leave the people that i love behind. i want them all to come with me, but sadly, they can't, or just have other plans that need to be fulfilled.
oh well. i'll just have to deal with my shit some other time...
for now, i'm going to go see what's wrong with david. and make him tell me, since i hate it when people do this.
<3 KT
well i have that at the moment... and i KNOW someone's not telling me whatever it is...
i know it isn't THAT big of a deal, and quite frankly, i'm almost positive that i know what the thing is that he's not talking to me about. i KNOW that if it's the thing that is in the back of my brain, then it ISN'T that big of a deal... just the fact that he's not talking to me about it really gets on my nerves.
i sit as he walks back and forth throughout the house... going from room to room putting stationary and oscilating fans everywhere.
things like this really bother me. when someone is mad at me (or just something about me, or even just having to do with me) i want them to talk to me about it, instead of just going around and when i ask them what is wrong, they say "it's nothing, don't worry about it."
things right now are really frustrating... nothing really having to do with david, or even this living situation; just things that make it hard to do things that don't involve work or getting up in the afternoon.
i want to be able to do things during the day. things outside that require being up before the late afternoon. i don't mean that they have to be extremely physical things like running and jumping into things... just things that normal people do. i really hate waking up only 2 hours before i have to go to work, giving myself only enough time to get ready for the day and eating something. it sucks. i want to be able to hang out with my friends as well... and doing the things that i do now don't allow me to do that.
things with the "friends being older than me" issue have been going well though. i don't complain as much about it cuz i just have to face the fact that i just need to deal with it and shut up.
i'm just tired and i need to get out of here. i know that i've been saying that for a really long time now, but i really do need to do something about it soon.
i had sort of a talk with amber about this the other day. i told her that even though i have all these plans of moving to portland, i still kind of want to stay at least until my birthday. that probably won't happen, since i'll probably go crazy before then. but that's what i want. i want to spend as much time with the little friends that i have and care about here before i go there.
it sounds selfish to me, but that's what i want. i can't stand to leave the people that i love behind. i want them all to come with me, but sadly, they can't, or just have other plans that need to be fulfilled.
oh well. i'll just have to deal with my shit some other time...
for now, i'm going to go see what's wrong with david. and make him tell me, since i hate it when people do this.
<3 KT