I didn't post anything about episode 5, so I'll just mention that a bit first.
Daenerys is getting her Targaryan blood on by burning people after the big fight... that refuses to bend the knee. She seems to be a bit hung up on that. :-P So, RIP house Tarly. *pets Sam for losing brother although good riddance daddy Tarly*
Talking off Sam, GAWD DAMMIT those science guys, because that's what maesters are!!! If it can't be explained with science, it doesn't exist. To bad that'll gonna kill ya'!
Sansa continues to rule in Winterfell, yay Girlpower! Does not like what they plant in this episode between Sansa and Arya though. Does not like at all. It feels just a bit unnecessary. :-P
Two things in Dragonstone: One, Varys is drinking! When did that happen? Things not going the way you want? And two, DROGON! He acts a bit like a cat and almost purrs when he lets Jon pet him. Targaryan blood in the play, maybe?
And Jamie survived from almost drowning, to no ones surprise. Thanks to Bronn. YAY Bronn! I like Bronn. Jamie is scared SHITLESS from seeing Drogon in action in that battle and returns to Kings Landing to warn Cersie who seems to think they should die fighting. Oh, and btw she's pregnant. Which I don't believe for a second! It's one of the oldest tricks in the book to assure your man's loyalty! She was promised three kids that would die. She had three kids and they died. There. Done.
Also, Jamie meets Tyrion, in a not so happy brotherly meeting. Tyrion who sneaks into Kings Landing to start up the most STUPID plan ever! Let's arrange a meeting with Cersie and show her a wight. Problem. They need a wight.
And to get a wight a very... interesting team goes to East Watch and gets even more interesting reenforcement. And then leave to go beyond the wall to find a wight! Because that's not a suicide mission...
Which leads us to episode 6! Second to last episode! Where shit usually hits the fan! And it sure did this time to...
In Winterfell Arya goes full out psychopath on Sansa. I mean, SERIOUSLY? She doesn't get that Sansa wrote that gawd damn letter under threat? You gotta be kidding me. I really REALLY don't like what they're doing with Sansa and Arya's rivalry there. I really don't. And wtf Sansa, why send Brianne away who has sworn to protect you both, and hence could have made sure none of you got killed? Nope. Don't like it.
And ffs, do NOT kill off Brianne in Kings Landing, dammit! She deserves more than that!
In Dragonstone Tyrion is talking about legacy with Daenerys... which she does NOT approve of since she's barren. So IF Dany wins the thrown, who'll come after her? That is actually a pretty important question, because just look at the wars following Roberth Baratheons death! But nope, she'll talk about that when she has the throne. Girl, it might be to late by then... Also, Tyrion sweetheart... do thread carefully... You to are one of my favorites!
Suicide mission on the other hand is the main thing this episode. Because it's SO STUPID! I mean, even if they DO manage to get the wight in one piece to Kings Landing, Cersie has not given a fuck about the rest of the world before, why would she start now? It's just idiotic.
Anyway, they move on. Appropriately enough they run into / find a small band of wights only lead by one whitewalker... So they attack them and when Jon kills the white walker all of the wights fall to pieces. Except one, how approriate... *cough*
It's after this that shit hits the fan. Apparently wights can scream for daddy! And daddy, in this case, is the Nightking or one of those that ride with him. So they get the WHOLE FREAKING ARMY OF THE DEAD ON THEIR TAIL!!! Not very fun. Not good odds.
Also, when did Gendry become so freaking fast? How could he run THAT WHOLE DISTANCE in THAT SHORT AMOUNT OF TIME?!?! And how fast are those ravens? SERIOUSLY?!?!?
Anyway, apparently wights can't go through water, so while our suicide mission stand on a rocky thing in the middle of a lake, they wait for the water to freeze. It does, and they attack. It's insanity for a while. Unnamed wildlings die left and right. The Nightking is smug (as he should be).
In the nick of time though, Daenerys arrive with all three of her dragons, burning wights left and right, body parts flying. I can't get over how cool the dragons look, even though it's FUCKING STUPID HOW QUICK THEY GOT THERE!!! THAT DOES NOT MAKE SENSE!!! LET ME DRIVE A TRUCK THROUGH THAT PLOTHOLE!!!
The Nightking, who secretly is an Olympic medalist in spear-throwing, manages to kill the yellow dragon Viserion. RIP, yellow dragon! But Daenerys, Drogon and the other dragon Rhaegal manages to save suicide mission. Except Jon who fights off wights while the others climb on Drogons back.
Excusee me while I scream in frustration over Jon. Seriously, this character. He is SO DULL!!! Even when fighting off an army of undead he manages to look dull and miserable. Seems like that is his go-to look! And it'll only get worse... GAH!!! WHY IS HE THE HERO?!?!? *swears up a storm*
Viserions body slip down the lake, and the rest fly off. Now, do explain to me WHY they didn't just continue on to Dragonstone on the back of Drogon but instead take a freaking ship once Jon is miraculously rescued by Benjen (RIP)? Because being miraculously rescued is Jon's middle name. *swears*
Again with the so called flirting between Jon and Daenerys... It's all from Dany's side when looking at it. Jon looks miserable and dull even when trying to look hot, hurt and flirty in a bed. Dude. That takes skill.
Beyond the wall the wights pull Viserion's dead body out of the water with chains. Now... the wights, who can't go INTO THE WATER has somehow put chains on a massive dragon that's laying submerged IN THE WATER... *drives truck through plothole*
And then the Nightking resurrects Viserion as a wight-dragon. *sigh* RIP Viserion. Your mommy mourns you. And she and your brothers will be pissed beyond belief when they see what has been done to you.
Things will be hairy from now on...
This entry is crossposted between LJ and DW. Comment where you are comfortable.