Tin Man - Squeecap Recap Part 3
Bet y'all thought I was never going to get to this one. What do I keep telling you about my love for confounding expectations? WARNING: this is my least favorite part, despite its clear and obvious good points. EDIT: And despite saying that this turned out LONG holy crap.
Part 1!
Part 2!
When we last left our heroes DG was a sobbing mess over destroying the entire world. I dunno, I think she was just living up to ever five-year-old's dream. Anyway, the guys were kinda standing around and it was ~awkward~ and so now we begin part 3 with a big sweeping CGI view of Central and the tower of doom and evil and now some mobats flapping majestically across the brilliant blue sky. Pretty!
Awww, poor dead Xora! HAI TRULY RIDICULOUS ASTRONOMY! Az, didn't your mother ever tell you not to stare at the suns? And really, Vy-Sor needs more love guys. He just does. LOL DG's holding a tiny stick, DRINK! *sips coffee* Oh hai Richard Dreyfuss! Wait, is that a flashback? DRINK! Az on horseback is effing awesome and this is still my favorite outfit, it's so, so pretty. I LOVE YOU AZ, YOU'RE INCREDIBLY HOT!
Oh shut up Tutor. I empathize with wee!DG, I never could get the hang of skipping stones. Also I am crediting Ambrose with the flat rocks/round rocks thing as it was likely involved in a physics lesson. All in favor? No, really, why is the swing still there?And this is my favorite outfit of the Queen's, but it still pisses me ff that we never see her DO anything. All she does is sit around and smile benignly, no wonder most of fandom hates her.
Oh please stop singing that damn song. HAI HOLO!QUEEN! The plan still sucks ass. Note how she's wearing the Northern Island/DG reviving regalia in the hologram. "Who's Ahamo?" "Who isn't? This is Oz, honey, everybody's bi in this dimens- oh, Ahamo. No idea, sorry." ALTERNATELY: "Ahamo is your father." "Damnit, Glitch, I knew it!" "Wait, WHAT?" Okay, I'll stop. But it never gets old.
Meanwhile with Team Evil and their awesome soundtrack and pretty ponies we have dead Xora again. So... the cave. I thought it was like RIGHT THERE in Finaqua. Like, after the maze. FAIL FAIL FAIL SciFi. Sidebar: my "And So The Slept" reading before watching the series had me convinced there was a flashback scene with Ambrose in the maze. Imagine my extreme disappointment. And now the swing is gone, what the HELL? Okay, sorry, getting distracted by really ridiculously hawt Az now. And why the Christ would the hologram EVER play again? Fail, Queeny and also probably Brosey.
And here we find the mole! Um, dog! The dog who's a mole! And stop calling him Pooch, Cain, it's really really offensive somehow. We do all agree that Cain is a bit of a dick, yes? It's not just me? That said, Tutor's sob story does nothing for me but then I'm biased about who's life has sucked the absolute most. "Tutor too!" Man, Zooey's really actually going for it in this scene. Props for that. Yay Baxter! Aww, Glitch picking up the viewdiscs is really randomly adorable.
Oh man I love this bit, poor Az, Kathleen is so amazingly win. Or maybe I'm clearly just a sucker for people playing two characters simultaneously. "I on the other hand will never leave you," the Witch says and immediately turns her back *shivers* This violin thing is really pretty too. The bit with the little clay dolls is really weird. This is all so, so much filler which could have been replaced with plot or Cain and Glitch bantering. NO DG, HE WILL HAVE NO IDEA WHO THE HELL MADE CREEPY CLAY REPLICAS OF "HIS" CHILDREN AND LEFT THEM SITTING AROUND. Sorry, it got away from me again. Boobies! DRINK!
And LOL this bit is just randomly hilarious. Glitch is like "And?" and Cain's all "What? Chill, bb, I got dis. I think." Oooh, pretty meadow! NONE OF THEM CAN RUN omg hee I could watch them failing at running over and over again but then I'd never get to the Realm. And stop looking for the R.B. Lounge, Keri. I am so amused by the number of happy slappy hoodies with ASBOs and ringtones. Or, you know, "tough looking thugs". RICKSHAW! Monks! Goats! Ridiculous bicycle! Boxing! Fire eaters! Oh gawd this is so awesome! And stop playing dumb, Glitch, you know you hung out here forever getting pimped out until Ahamo rescued you go write that fic now Surr. "And my father is here? How odd." No, really, why are we not seeing other headcases, if they'd be anywhere this'd be it. FAIL, SCIFI. Huh. There's a sign for the Sacred Heart Mission. Weird. LOL WANTED POSTER.
Oh boys, partners in crime, I LOVE YOU. HAI AIROFDAY! *pays close attention to DG's bitchfaces* Raw and Glitch are so adorable, really. Especially Raw cracking up with the pointing in a zillion directions bit. "Twenty platinums?!" "Done." *insert "Services Rendered" HERE, cry like a baby* LOL Local Tavern. Rising of the first moon after midnight. You guys do know you're underground, y/y?
Ahamo's such a creeper, guys. Meanwhile at the crazy teepee- wait. Isn't it supposed to be night by now? OMFG. "Really? I don't." In light of the fic reference in the last paragraph all I can say is awwwwww! In Soviet OZ, Seeker finds YOU! Yeah, he wants to see the one without the freakin' magical mark of awesome, DG. LOL fight scene. Longcoat done stole Cain's hat, that is NOT ON. At least Cain acknowledges that the whole Seeker-thing was partly his fault. Share the blame, fellas, there's mutual pity!sex in it for ya later. HAI BITCHY ZERO! *HEADLOG* Speaking of, there has to be another way out of the Realm because there's no way that thing's going up a ladder.
STICK! Drink! Honey you're supposed to use the non-bristly end of the broom, unless you're gonna be REALLY creative. "Everything you think you know you don't." Well that's just great. Wow I hate him. And stop saying she's just like her mother. Gragh. "What would they want you to do?" "I don't see how taking off my shirt's going to help the situation."
HAI JEB! (Hai Emrys!) Nice kick to the head there, Cain. "Path Not Taken" has ruined this bit for me, and by ruined I mean looooooooool. "Remember how it felt when you were a little girl." Wait WHAT. LOL balloon. LOL kilts, so many kilts in this thing, Alan had to have given a seminar at some point. Jeb is so screwed in the head, and so very pretty. "I thought you were dead." You keep saying that. Okay, I take it back, MOST AWKWARD HUG EVER. So... okay, the Queen took her to Milltown after she'd lost her husband but Ahamo took her to the Otherside and then came back? HUH?
Wait, wait wait wait, it was just night, then sunrise, now it's day again, and it's gonna be night again when Zero gets suit'd. FAIL, EDITORS. Oh, Jebby loves his faux!torture, and Zero's a massive flake. "Let him talk. TALK!" Rrow! Who the hell didn't smack Ambrose around a lot for coming up with this Sun Seeder thing? Unless, as I suspect, they were all completely nuts by the end there *gets idea for drunken miserable hawt hijinks, runs with it* LOL brain room. LOL SPOONS! Jeb, sweetie, you might wanna use the sharp edge of the sword there. On second thought, maybe you don't.
Meanwhile, in, DG Opens Doors, we have DG opening a door! DRINK! And sorry guys, but it is a pretty mausoleum. My architecture geek may be talking but... eh. Another door and my pretty comm banner! DRINK! Scarecrow! 39! Kitty! HAI DOROTHY! Silver slippers yeah bitches! Yay emerald, ya might wanna stick that in a pocket or something Deege. And WTH is this thing? Dream? Flashback? Hallucination? What? I don't get it. No one does. FAIL, writers.
And... suns setting, rising, what? Whatever, Az is being fucking awesome. Yeah, just stand there DG, that's fantastic. Man I watched the bit with DG in the coffin too many times for the TR debut post. Wasn't the suit like way closer to camp before? I may have to geek out and try to tie my red scarf like Jebby's. And hang on Raw's doing his thing where he fails at empath again. LOL! Oh hai Toto. Okay, I hate this outfit too but it's still better than the gold thing. And eee Vy-Sor! "History is about to be repeated" what? "DG is the key to bringing the Witch down." Mmm, focused motivation... and aww huggings!
Lawl family reunion! "Just pure, utter shock." Blah blah blah here have some pure villian gloating. And now PUPPY! So how long were they sitting on that log? Pony rides for everybody! OMG HAI LILY LOU! :D I must be the only girl who never dreamed of Her Hero riding up on a white horse t save her. Mostly because I read The Black Stallion books. Take that as you will. "You okay?" "I just saved my own ass, AGAIN, thank you very much. Also yay y'all aren't dead."
Let me pause and admire the pointless little arm brush. *pauses, admires, rewinds, watches again, beams* And now for the epic pep talk! "All that I need is right here." "Boobies?" "...no, Raw." Awww, hug! Aww, double-Glitchnod and smiles, smiles all around, HOW ARE THEY SO CUTE? Hug! "Thank you." *flails and dies and draws hearts* All right, time to go bug the old man. (No, really, is this the scene on the hill you guys are always on about because I honestly do not know.) "What's really important is ~family.~* *happy!flail* Awww, hug!
Where the hell is the camera beaming Az's image down to the depths of the tower? Also 500 years what lol? Speaking of "what lol?" I feel I need to point out this screencap from the trailer. WHAT. Also who's the hottie longcoat, did he get promoted when Zero was captured? And why did I never notice him before? "Have fun storming the castle!" HANDPORN! No, I am not going to try playing "Spot Helene" among the alchemists *snuggles her* HAT! Brushing off the hat and elegant hat hand-off! I adore DG's little salute, it's freakin' adorable.
LOL kung-fu interrupted! And Tutor pwning longcoat ass, this is awesome. HAI BRAIN-INNA-JAR! Okay, my theory: Az, being one for aesthetics, would have wanted to see a whole brain inna jar. What we actually see is a container SHAPED like a whole brain. So yeah. It's a brain inna jar inna brain inna jar. *spends rest of scene clapping and flailing* "My name isn't Glitch. It's Ambrose." That look on his face MY GOD. *hand to heart* And hey, if you were a brain inna jar (inna brain inna jar) and for the first time in a decade able to see-feel-hear-smell-speak, and it's by proxy, and some cranky guy in a fedora is asking you stupid questions, you'd be a bit pissy too. All I'm sayin'. Also the other numbers were in fact his locker combination, parents' anniversary, and the office number of his favorite professor at university. They just happen to sound awful familiar to us earthlings.
Synapse interference lolz! That is the longest ladder ever, man. "A FIERCE new world is awakening." Hee! "My sister! D:" DRINK! Well, crap, that last step is a doozie. HAI KALM! "And the last number, to reverse light pulsing, is the year the Coin Act was repealed." Raynz is so fucking creepy. Oh stop with the singing already! And Zooey actually sells it again, sorta. *flail* Awww, wee princesses! YAY DG! Way to make up for being a total failure!
"NOT MY HEADCASE YOU BITCH!" Wait, what? Great, now they just pissed the Witch off and made her bigger. Smooth. Excuse me a minute, my icon is distracting me. "That line was meant to be sarcastic!" Yeah well Neal delivered it like that which means Cain meant it like that. Also the hand over the heart. Aw, and he calls him Ambrose before he gets hooked up again, that also strikes me as randomly sweet. SHUT UP ALL OF YOU. Oh Cain, sweetie, this might not hurt you as much as it will hurt him but it's nice to see the thought was there. "Commence the reverse pulsing, bitch! =D" YAY BOYS, YES WE CAN!
Huggings! Oh poor Az, poor poor Az. GROUP HUG! Have another bonus feature screencaps of lolz Aww, nice touch with Raw healing the gunshot. *flails at all the happy* GLOMP! And I love how Raw picks her up! And eee little huggytiems! And... and we all know how it ends. Right there. Still. Hasn't changed. SIGH.
And done. Thank God.
Part 1!
Part 2!
When we last left our heroes DG was a sobbing mess over destroying the entire world. I dunno, I think she was just living up to ever five-year-old's dream. Anyway, the guys were kinda standing around and it was ~awkward~ and so now we begin part 3 with a big sweeping CGI view of Central and the tower of doom and evil and now some mobats flapping majestically across the brilliant blue sky. Pretty!
Awww, poor dead Xora! HAI TRULY RIDICULOUS ASTRONOMY! Az, didn't your mother ever tell you not to stare at the suns? And really, Vy-Sor needs more love guys. He just does. LOL DG's holding a tiny stick, DRINK! *sips coffee* Oh hai Richard Dreyfuss! Wait, is that a flashback? DRINK! Az on horseback is effing awesome and this is still my favorite outfit, it's so, so pretty. I LOVE YOU AZ, YOU'RE INCREDIBLY HOT!
Oh shut up Tutor. I empathize with wee!DG, I never could get the hang of skipping stones. Also I am crediting Ambrose with the flat rocks/round rocks thing as it was likely involved in a physics lesson. All in favor? No, really, why is the swing still there?And this is my favorite outfit of the Queen's, but it still pisses me ff that we never see her DO anything. All she does is sit around and smile benignly, no wonder most of fandom hates her.
Oh please stop singing that damn song. HAI HOLO!QUEEN! The plan still sucks ass. Note how she's wearing the Northern Island/DG reviving regalia in the hologram. "Who's Ahamo?" "Who isn't? This is Oz, honey, everybody's bi in this dimens- oh, Ahamo. No idea, sorry." ALTERNATELY: "Ahamo is your father." "Damnit, Glitch, I knew it!" "Wait, WHAT?" Okay, I'll stop. But it never gets old.
Meanwhile with Team Evil and their awesome soundtrack and pretty ponies we have dead Xora again. So... the cave. I thought it was like RIGHT THERE in Finaqua. Like, after the maze. FAIL FAIL FAIL SciFi. Sidebar: my "And So The Slept" reading before watching the series had me convinced there was a flashback scene with Ambrose in the maze. Imagine my extreme disappointment. And now the swing is gone, what the HELL? Okay, sorry, getting distracted by really ridiculously hawt Az now. And why the Christ would the hologram EVER play again? Fail, Queeny and also probably Brosey.
And here we find the mole! Um, dog! The dog who's a mole! And stop calling him Pooch, Cain, it's really really offensive somehow. We do all agree that Cain is a bit of a dick, yes? It's not just me? That said, Tutor's sob story does nothing for me but then I'm biased about who's life has sucked the absolute most. "Tutor too!" Man, Zooey's really actually going for it in this scene. Props for that. Yay Baxter! Aww, Glitch picking up the viewdiscs is really randomly adorable.
Oh man I love this bit, poor Az, Kathleen is so amazingly win. Or maybe I'm clearly just a sucker for people playing two characters simultaneously. "I on the other hand will never leave you," the Witch says and immediately turns her back *shivers* This violin thing is really pretty too. The bit with the little clay dolls is really weird. This is all so, so much filler which could have been replaced with plot or Cain and Glitch bantering. NO DG, HE WILL HAVE NO IDEA WHO THE HELL MADE CREEPY CLAY REPLICAS OF "HIS" CHILDREN AND LEFT THEM SITTING AROUND. Sorry, it got away from me again. Boobies! DRINK!
And LOL this bit is just randomly hilarious. Glitch is like "And?" and Cain's all "What? Chill, bb, I got dis. I think." Oooh, pretty meadow! NONE OF THEM CAN RUN omg hee I could watch them failing at running over and over again but then I'd never get to the Realm. And stop looking for the R.B. Lounge, Keri. I am so amused by the number of happy slappy hoodies with ASBOs and ringtones. Or, you know, "tough looking thugs". RICKSHAW! Monks! Goats! Ridiculous bicycle! Boxing! Fire eaters! Oh gawd this is so awesome! And stop playing dumb, Glitch, you know you hung out here forever getting pimped out until Ahamo rescued you go write that fic now Surr. "And my father is here? How odd." No, really, why are we not seeing other headcases, if they'd be anywhere this'd be it. FAIL, SCIFI. Huh. There's a sign for the Sacred Heart Mission. Weird. LOL WANTED POSTER.
Oh boys, partners in crime, I LOVE YOU. HAI AIROFDAY! *pays close attention to DG's bitchfaces* Raw and Glitch are so adorable, really. Especially Raw cracking up with the pointing in a zillion directions bit. "Twenty platinums?!" "Done." *insert "Services Rendered" HERE, cry like a baby* LOL Local Tavern. Rising of the first moon after midnight. You guys do know you're underground, y/y?
Ahamo's such a creeper, guys. Meanwhile at the crazy teepee- wait. Isn't it supposed to be night by now? OMFG. "Really? I don't." In light of the fic reference in the last paragraph all I can say is awwwwww! In Soviet OZ, Seeker finds YOU! Yeah, he wants to see the one without the freakin' magical mark of awesome, DG. LOL fight scene. Longcoat done stole Cain's hat, that is NOT ON. At least Cain acknowledges that the whole Seeker-thing was partly his fault. Share the blame, fellas, there's mutual pity!sex in it for ya later. HAI BITCHY ZERO! *HEADLOG* Speaking of, there has to be another way out of the Realm because there's no way that thing's going up a ladder.
STICK! Drink! Honey you're supposed to use the non-bristly end of the broom, unless you're gonna be REALLY creative. "Everything you think you know you don't." Well that's just great. Wow I hate him. And stop saying she's just like her mother. Gragh. "What would they want you to do?" "I don't see how taking off my shirt's going to help the situation."
HAI JEB! (Hai Emrys!) Nice kick to the head there, Cain. "Path Not Taken" has ruined this bit for me, and by ruined I mean looooooooool. "Remember how it felt when you were a little girl." Wait WHAT. LOL balloon. LOL kilts, so many kilts in this thing, Alan had to have given a seminar at some point. Jeb is so screwed in the head, and so very pretty. "I thought you were dead." You keep saying that. Okay, I take it back, MOST AWKWARD HUG EVER. So... okay, the Queen took her to Milltown after she'd lost her husband but Ahamo took her to the Otherside and then came back? HUH?
Wait, wait wait wait, it was just night, then sunrise, now it's day again, and it's gonna be night again when Zero gets suit'd. FAIL, EDITORS. Oh, Jebby loves his faux!torture, and Zero's a massive flake. "Let him talk. TALK!" Rrow! Who the hell didn't smack Ambrose around a lot for coming up with this Sun Seeder thing? Unless, as I suspect, they were all completely nuts by the end there *gets idea for drunken miserable hawt hijinks, runs with it* LOL brain room. LOL SPOONS! Jeb, sweetie, you might wanna use the sharp edge of the sword there. On second thought, maybe you don't.
Meanwhile, in, DG Opens Doors, we have DG opening a door! DRINK! And sorry guys, but it is a pretty mausoleum. My architecture geek may be talking but... eh. Another door and my pretty comm banner! DRINK! Scarecrow! 39! Kitty! HAI DOROTHY! Silver slippers yeah bitches! Yay emerald, ya might wanna stick that in a pocket or something Deege. And WTH is this thing? Dream? Flashback? Hallucination? What? I don't get it. No one does. FAIL, writers.
And... suns setting, rising, what? Whatever, Az is being fucking awesome. Yeah, just stand there DG, that's fantastic. Man I watched the bit with DG in the coffin too many times for the TR debut post. Wasn't the suit like way closer to camp before? I may have to geek out and try to tie my red scarf like Jebby's. And hang on Raw's doing his thing where he fails at empath again. LOL! Oh hai Toto. Okay, I hate this outfit too but it's still better than the gold thing. And eee Vy-Sor! "History is about to be repeated" what? "DG is the key to bringing the Witch down." Mmm, focused motivation... and aww huggings!
Lawl family reunion! "Just pure, utter shock." Blah blah blah here have some pure villian gloating. And now PUPPY! So how long were they sitting on that log? Pony rides for everybody! OMG HAI LILY LOU! :D I must be the only girl who never dreamed of Her Hero riding up on a white horse t save her. Mostly because I read The Black Stallion books. Take that as you will. "You okay?" "I just saved my own ass, AGAIN, thank you very much. Also yay y'all aren't dead."
Let me pause and admire the pointless little arm brush. *pauses, admires, rewinds, watches again, beams* And now for the epic pep talk! "All that I need is right here." "Boobies?" "...no, Raw." Awww, hug! Aww, double-Glitchnod and smiles, smiles all around, HOW ARE THEY SO CUTE? Hug! "Thank you." *flails and dies and draws hearts* All right, time to go bug the old man. (No, really, is this the scene on the hill you guys are always on about because I honestly do not know.) "What's really important is ~family.~* *happy!flail* Awww, hug!
Where the hell is the camera beaming Az's image down to the depths of the tower? Also 500 years what lol? Speaking of "what lol?" I feel I need to point out this screencap from the trailer. WHAT. Also who's the hottie longcoat, did he get promoted when Zero was captured? And why did I never notice him before? "Have fun storming the castle!" HANDPORN! No, I am not going to try playing "Spot Helene" among the alchemists *snuggles her* HAT! Brushing off the hat and elegant hat hand-off! I adore DG's little salute, it's freakin' adorable.
LOL kung-fu interrupted! And Tutor pwning longcoat ass, this is awesome. HAI BRAIN-INNA-JAR! Okay, my theory: Az, being one for aesthetics, would have wanted to see a whole brain inna jar. What we actually see is a container SHAPED like a whole brain. So yeah. It's a brain inna jar inna brain inna jar. *spends rest of scene clapping and flailing* "My name isn't Glitch. It's Ambrose." That look on his face MY GOD. *hand to heart* And hey, if you were a brain inna jar (inna brain inna jar) and for the first time in a decade able to see-feel-hear-smell-speak, and it's by proxy, and some cranky guy in a fedora is asking you stupid questions, you'd be a bit pissy too. All I'm sayin'. Also the other numbers were in fact his locker combination, parents' anniversary, and the office number of his favorite professor at university. They just happen to sound awful familiar to us earthlings.
Synapse interference lolz! That is the longest ladder ever, man. "A FIERCE new world is awakening." Hee! "My sister! D:" DRINK! Well, crap, that last step is a doozie. HAI KALM! "And the last number, to reverse light pulsing, is the year the Coin Act was repealed." Raynz is so fucking creepy. Oh stop with the singing already! And Zooey actually sells it again, sorta. *flail* Awww, wee princesses! YAY DG! Way to make up for being a total failure!
"NOT MY HEADCASE YOU BITCH!" Wait, what? Great, now they just pissed the Witch off and made her bigger. Smooth. Excuse me a minute, my icon is distracting me. "That line was meant to be sarcastic!" Yeah well Neal delivered it like that which means Cain meant it like that. Also the hand over the heart. Aw, and he calls him Ambrose before he gets hooked up again, that also strikes me as randomly sweet. SHUT UP ALL OF YOU. Oh Cain, sweetie, this might not hurt you as much as it will hurt him but it's nice to see the thought was there. "Commence the reverse pulsing, bitch! =D" YAY BOYS, YES WE CAN!
Huggings! Oh poor Az, poor poor Az. GROUP HUG! Have another bonus feature screencaps of lolz Aww, nice touch with Raw healing the gunshot. *flails at all the happy* GLOMP! And I love how Raw picks her up! And eee little huggytiems! And... and we all know how it ends. Right there. Still. Hasn't changed. SIGH.
And done. Thank God.