mooching off of Gray Birch's internet again *tsk tsk*
A post from Kelley at nearly 1:00 in the morning?! She must have internet access at home!!
Sadly, no.
But hopefully soon! I've got the phone number for Verizon, and I brought that to Matt today along with some other stuff he needed to start the process of getting internet and phone set up at the apartment. He also might be getting out of here soon, so that will be awesome. He still isn't healing like he should be, I guess, but neither he nor his mom think that lying in bed here is helping him any at this point. He'll probably still be on limited sitting when he gets home, but it'll be better than having to travel to see him, and having to spend time with him in a relatively "public place". Ahem.
I'm in a better spot mentally than I was when I made my last post. I've done laundry since then and, while a pain in the ass, it wasn't completely unbearable. I have clean dishcloths with which to wash dishes. My cold is pretty much gone, with only some lingering mucus that feels like it's beginning to break up and move out of my head, at long fucking last. I've also received mail from a couple of you! You know who you are, and thank you. :D I'll be writing back soon, if I've got an address to write back to.
Emotionally I'm feeling kind of... off. I've been feeling sort of unaffected and withdrawn. I really don't like it because I feel subhuman or something; I feel "like everyone else". Like the many, many people in my life who are passionate about so little, whose primary concerns are money and work. Not that those things have no importance, but, I don't know.
For awhile now I've noticed I don't really feel "connected" to much of anything, or anybody. I want to feel that. Not all that long ago I was hoping to take steps to change that, and I felt like I was getting there; but that's all stopped and I've "devolved" to merely surviving. I can't tell if it's depression or what. I don't feel bad. I just sort of feel... blah. And it's worse when I'm around other people--I hold in my emotions a lot. Even with Matt. We watched Dead Poets Society the other night and that movie usually makes me cry, or at least I feel awesomely inspired and emotionally aroused by the end of it. The other night, pretty much nothing. I don't know how to shake it. Any ideas?
I might write more on this later. I feel like my writing skills have suffered from lack of practice. Haha.
Hope you're all doing well. :)
Sadly, no.
But hopefully soon! I've got the phone number for Verizon, and I brought that to Matt today along with some other stuff he needed to start the process of getting internet and phone set up at the apartment. He also might be getting out of here soon, so that will be awesome. He still isn't healing like he should be, I guess, but neither he nor his mom think that lying in bed here is helping him any at this point. He'll probably still be on limited sitting when he gets home, but it'll be better than having to travel to see him, and having to spend time with him in a relatively "public place". Ahem.
I'm in a better spot mentally than I was when I made my last post. I've done laundry since then and, while a pain in the ass, it wasn't completely unbearable. I have clean dishcloths with which to wash dishes. My cold is pretty much gone, with only some lingering mucus that feels like it's beginning to break up and move out of my head, at long fucking last. I've also received mail from a couple of you! You know who you are, and thank you. :D I'll be writing back soon, if I've got an address to write back to.
Emotionally I'm feeling kind of... off. I've been feeling sort of unaffected and withdrawn. I really don't like it because I feel subhuman or something; I feel "like everyone else". Like the many, many people in my life who are passionate about so little, whose primary concerns are money and work. Not that those things have no importance, but, I don't know.
For awhile now I've noticed I don't really feel "connected" to much of anything, or anybody. I want to feel that. Not all that long ago I was hoping to take steps to change that, and I felt like I was getting there; but that's all stopped and I've "devolved" to merely surviving. I can't tell if it's depression or what. I don't feel bad. I just sort of feel... blah. And it's worse when I'm around other people--I hold in my emotions a lot. Even with Matt. We watched Dead Poets Society the other night and that movie usually makes me cry, or at least I feel awesomely inspired and emotionally aroused by the end of it. The other night, pretty much nothing. I don't know how to shake it. Any ideas?
I might write more on this later. I feel like my writing skills have suffered from lack of practice. Haha.
Hope you're all doing well. :)