It is your... Destiny!
• It is your... Destiny!
/// Incoming Transmission ((061506:02:57 | 33°49 / 90°42)) ///
I have a lot to say, as usual, it may come out as rambling.
When one finds love, as I have, one trips. That trip soon becomes a fall. It is true that I fall very quickly; and oftentimes I hit bottom. You see, the fall does not break you, it's the sudden stop at the end. In this instance my faith, trust, conviction, ambition and will (all coupled with God) have led to love. This love allows me to have found my happy thought. That happy thought allows you to fall, but upwards, forever. Together we are invincible, and will never hit bottom. The stars are our jesters and all the firmament is a stage.
How is it you know, upon meeting someone, "This is the woman I want to marry"? I know it now. I have met her.
I attended church with her. As an elder (a male of considerable age) I was asked to bless the Fruit of the Vine, the Liquid portion of the sacrament (communion). In saying the prayer in front of a congregation I had never met, my love for God (and her) was bolstered, as was my Faith. I was being asked to perform a task in service of the church and God. She tells me that she nearly cried; proud of my conviction and our love. Those are strong words. I am moved by her faith. I consider her a gift from God. I have long known that every loyal servant of The Lord is promised a worthy partner, and mate. I have prayed for Him to unite me with mine, and I have been. It is only now, that I am to be -equally- yoked.
In the name (and will of Him) we can do all things. Half of a miracle is faith, his divinity is the rest. Without God, man can perform no miracle. In fact, it can be said that man does not perform them, but God, through man does great deeds. I wholly agree.
We have spent the past few days loving one another. Communing together, we have picked each other's brains intimately. We have gotten to know each other completely. Let me say this. She is a nerd. God thank you! She is a nerd, and loves me for my knowledge, my creativity, my talent, my ambition, and most of all my mild retardation. We have spent our days and nights, talking, laughing, eating, watching Family Guy, and Battle Star Galactica, "Yes, I -talk- to myself".
She gives me purpose. I admit I am a culmination of all my past experiences. Most of all, though she knows all my dark secrets, she is an accountability partner. She will actually strengthen my walk with God; and I her's. I know now that to achieve greatness in his plan, one must be patient and let Him guide you. I have -known- this all along; but, oftentimes, knowing and doing are drastically different.
I have told her that now she gives me purpose. When I drive cross country I do my best -not- to look at -every- mile marker. It makes the time go by quicker. I love her completely, and want to be united with her. I know that my family will cherish her as well. We both have to finish school. And I need a job that pays so I can support us. I have told her that I am willing to lay it all (save my faith) on the line to be with her. When World War Three begins, I will be conflicted, and will have to choose between being between her and my family. God's will be done.
Fear. Fear is the mind killer. In that, it is not enough that I have found a new love. No, now I have a new fear as well. Something else I must offer up to Him, lest it pollute my mind, and our relationship. My fear? That -something- will happen to her. Now that I have her, now that I have let her in, now that I have let her close; something, will take her from me. Disaster, Disease, War, Accidents, Disinterest; I do not fear for a lack of her fidelity, I fear for all the other unquantifiable variables that would intrude on our objective; The Forever.
I leave in the morning. I prayed with her tonight. I offered my life and her's up to God. I concentrated our relationship in prayer, and begged for his divine hand in our lives. I already believe that it has been there, and do not think Him to abandon us now, but it certainly does not hurt to strengthen that with prayer.
/// End Transmission ///
• Random Thoughts.
• I need a haircut.
• Commander Adama reminds me of my Dad.
• There is a certain glamor, both to being a Trucker and a Traveling Salesman. In that, I think is the travel. Part, of me, would not mind waking up in a new motel every night. However, I imagine, that, in time, the motel walls would blend together. Each day, waking up, I would question what city I am in, and what my primary objective is. Either way, I would not be able to have a family. Perhaps I should just write about the experience. A Traveling Salesman in space, is an interesting (Lord, I hate that word) concept.
• ID needs polish. We need to work more, and work harder. I have many new ideas, now that I have been on a sabbatical. I fear that the Wiki has not changed one bit, and that I need to withdraw the project down to a loyal handful.
• Fide, is Latin for loyalty and/or deviation. Fidelity is the same. To Confide, is to Connect to one that you are Loyal to. "Fide custos Deus ex in nomine", Keeping the faith, in the name of God. Custos is the root of the word Custodian.
• People look like ants!!!
• I am still working on the Crunkasaurus.
• I very much think that I will make a Bible Wiki; not for the sake of sacrelige but to help me analyze and cross reference my own faith. I will keep it secure, but public, and also have it internally cross reference other passages. As well as speculate on hidden and obvious meanings and translations. Not only what it says, and what I think, but what my Student Bible, and top analysts believe.
• I am only going to get about 4 hours of sleep. I have ran on less.
• I may design a new Tattoo for us. An image, centered around sacred geometry. In Latin it will say something, the equivalent to, "Entering The Forever, in Unity". I want to find a better, majestic, yet -all encompassing- word than, "Entering". I also want to put an adjective before, "Unity".
• For all my love an affection, I don't even remember when her birthday is. :S