(no subject)
wow. its been like forever. well im sitting at home sulking because i suck at making cookies. you see, i attempted to bake them for my dad, i even looked up the TOLL HOUSE RECIPE online and printed the bitch out. i followd the directions to a mutha fuckin T and what do i get? shit cookies!! they suck balllls. plus i get a disturbing call at 11:30 last night (note: i've been asleep since like 7 cuz i felt like shit and had a bad head ache) from my drunken asshole of an ex-bf.
it went a little something like this:
Alex: screams VERY loudly at me "HEY!!!!!! WHAT DO YOU WANT"
me: "you called me. are you drunk?"
Alex: "NO. well.......i might be"
Josh: "kristina if you dont get yo ass over to (some address number) tahiti...i got 40's and chex mix....::muffle-ness::...girl you dont need condoms for this party!! woo hooo girl get you're ass over here right fuckin now!!"
Alex "ahahahaha SO WHAT DO YOU WANT?? DAMN YALL THIS IS THE BEST FUCKIN.....::click::" so mhmm yeah it KINDA pissed me off.
and what made it worse was that i was seriously considering getting back together with him soon. now idk when itll be. im also pissed/depressed/confussed/frustrated at the fact that no matter what i tell myself, im still crazy about him. and i cant fight it off. i'm afraid certain people will see me as 'weak' or worse, 'predictable'. yeah i always say the same thing and always do the opposite. i thought this time i'd be strong but its hard. and i have no one to talk to about it. its sad that i now have more guy friends than girls. didnt think thatd happen. and guys are worthless when it comes to problems and advice. im sure as hell not confiding in any of them, but im afraid i may go crazy if i try to figure things out all by myself.
on a lighter note, im trying to think of a little gift (other than the shit cookies) to give to my dad, since today is father's day and all. (for those of you who know me, you know he's not my real father. but he's my dad.) i got him a cute lil funny card and i wanna get him like a bowl or something (since he eats EVERYTHING from a damn bowl. with ketchup. ew i know) sounds gay though doesnt it?? idk. imma go look around in good ole target as soon as i can get up off my lazy ass, take a shower and get ready.
our hot tub is up and running now, so whoever wants to come over and sit with me listening to country music and feeling shittin, bring it.
alex is so cute. ahem, MY LITTLE COUSIN ALEX that is. we took him w/ us to my mom's friend's son's b-day party. and i took him swimming. everytime i'd ask him if he was cold he'd give me this smirk and say "i like cold" it was cute.
working with my mom has brought us closer. i feel weird saying that because, again, those of you who know me know that my mom's known as the crazy evil bitch. but she's been more 'motherly' lately. she actually OFFERED to get me a new car. holly shit i know. so i might ask her to go see the lake house one day after work this week with me. that should be...interesting. mainly because the last time i remember seeing a movie with my mom was when tarzan was in theaters. yeah.
well i think im off to go sit in the hot tub then go to target, then go hangout with my dad. sorry this shit is so damn long. but no one reads it anymore so i figured i could just vent on here. loves. hope you're having more fun than me!!! muah
it went a little something like this:
Alex: screams VERY loudly at me "HEY!!!!!! WHAT DO YOU WANT"
me: "you called me. are you drunk?"
Alex: "NO. well.......i might be"
Josh: "kristina if you dont get yo ass over to (some address number) tahiti...i got 40's and chex mix....::muffle-ness::...girl you dont need condoms for this party!! woo hooo girl get you're ass over here right fuckin now!!"
Alex "ahahahaha SO WHAT DO YOU WANT?? DAMN YALL THIS IS THE BEST FUCKIN.....::click::" so mhmm yeah it KINDA pissed me off.
and what made it worse was that i was seriously considering getting back together with him soon. now idk when itll be. im also pissed/depressed/confussed/frustrated at the fact that no matter what i tell myself, im still crazy about him. and i cant fight it off. i'm afraid certain people will see me as 'weak' or worse, 'predictable'. yeah i always say the same thing and always do the opposite. i thought this time i'd be strong but its hard. and i have no one to talk to about it. its sad that i now have more guy friends than girls. didnt think thatd happen. and guys are worthless when it comes to problems and advice. im sure as hell not confiding in any of them, but im afraid i may go crazy if i try to figure things out all by myself.
on a lighter note, im trying to think of a little gift (other than the shit cookies) to give to my dad, since today is father's day and all. (for those of you who know me, you know he's not my real father. but he's my dad.) i got him a cute lil funny card and i wanna get him like a bowl or something (since he eats EVERYTHING from a damn bowl. with ketchup. ew i know) sounds gay though doesnt it?? idk. imma go look around in good ole target as soon as i can get up off my lazy ass, take a shower and get ready.
our hot tub is up and running now, so whoever wants to come over and sit with me listening to country music and feeling shittin, bring it.
alex is so cute. ahem, MY LITTLE COUSIN ALEX that is. we took him w/ us to my mom's friend's son's b-day party. and i took him swimming. everytime i'd ask him if he was cold he'd give me this smirk and say "i like cold" it was cute.
working with my mom has brought us closer. i feel weird saying that because, again, those of you who know me know that my mom's known as the crazy evil bitch. but she's been more 'motherly' lately. she actually OFFERED to get me a new car. holly shit i know. so i might ask her to go see the lake house one day after work this week with me. that should be...interesting. mainly because the last time i remember seeing a movie with my mom was when tarzan was in theaters. yeah.
well i think im off to go sit in the hot tub then go to target, then go hangout with my dad. sorry this shit is so damn long. but no one reads it anymore so i figured i could just vent on here. loves. hope you're having more fun than me!!! muah