(no subject)
some of you can skip this post if depression gets you down... I won't mind, in fact I won't even know
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well this started out as a depressed post - but I realize it has turned into a Major Rant!!
Housemate has all of a sudden determined that **I** am the source of all his lifelong problems and has decided to cut all communication off towards me - to punish me (not hubby who he can still order around)..
Funny - he has been eating our food, using our utilities/ internet, having us drive him everywhere, re-arranging our apt to suit HIS needs, having his friends over whenever he wanted and for how ever long he wanted ... all without paying much at all in rent or gas. He doesn't even offer to 'pay' his rent in helping out around the apt, or helping with any kind of work that needs to be done.
And because hubby and I decided to put a few simple rules down on paper - all of a sudden **I** am the ogre, no one else....
His primary complaint at me is 'It is ALWAYS - your way or the highway!!" - if I wasn't secure in my own self I would take this as a major problem and try to show him that I DO NOT want everything my way - in doing so he gets his way even more and gets me even more under his thumb.
It is OK for him to be a pathological lier and compulsive bullshitter - he demands that people tell the absolute truth to him
It is OK for him to force himself to the center of attention - but anyone trying to get a word in edgewise is accused of 'butting in' and 'trying to annoy people with your useless talk"
It is OK for him to take what he wants from anyone - but don't even *think* of joking about touching something of his!
He states that he is a Native American Shaman,, but he enjoys telling stories of how when he was 'overseas' he was in the thick of warfare and enjoyed killing people. Shamans / Priests / Spiritual Leaders normally do not 'enjoy' killing people. They promote peace and understanding (most of the time).
If you offer something to him for a temp use - he takes the item and hides it in his stuff, and when you go retrieve said item he gets all screammy and temper tantrum at you. Trying to make you feel like the 'bad person'.
BUT!!
If he gives you something you are to realize he is only giving it to you until he wants / needs it back and you are to give it back to him without a whimper - no matter what he said when he gave it to you.
He gets jobs and then his personality really comes out and he sabotages his job and then complains it wasn't HIS fault he lost it, or it was someone who hates him, or the moon was in the wrong quarter.
I allowed his behavior because I was getting a 'friendship' of sorts out of it. Now it has gone beyond my limits and I find that I don't really care if he talks to me or not.... his choice.
Many of my friends have been supportive towards me about housemate. Now I see what they have been gently saying about him.
Now I have a choice - screwed up housemate or all my friends
SNORT!! no choice!
Friends will never yell at you for being yourself, friends will not try to take over your life and then get upset when you don't follow their advice to the letter, friends will tell you where to go and then later get told to go to the same place, friends understand that you need to do things your own way and won't demand that you ignore your own feelings and do it someone else's way. Friends understand and accept you the way you are - not the way they want yu to be.
A True Friend Knows All About You and Likes You Anyway!!
I spent 2 years with a Mental & Emotional Abuser who was passive-aggressive ... I WILL NOT play that game again! Not unless I allow it - and on MY terms!
Does anyone know of a Animal Shelter that will take this 30+ year old immature, little snot?? I will not burden a person with his behaviors, so I figure he can live with the other animals.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
well this started out as a depressed post - but I realize it has turned into a Major Rant!!
Housemate has all of a sudden determined that **I** am the source of all his lifelong problems and has decided to cut all communication off towards me - to punish me (not hubby who he can still order around)..
Funny - he has been eating our food, using our utilities/ internet, having us drive him everywhere, re-arranging our apt to suit HIS needs, having his friends over whenever he wanted and for how ever long he wanted ... all without paying much at all in rent or gas. He doesn't even offer to 'pay' his rent in helping out around the apt, or helping with any kind of work that needs to be done.
And because hubby and I decided to put a few simple rules down on paper - all of a sudden **I** am the ogre, no one else....
His primary complaint at me is 'It is ALWAYS - your way or the highway!!" - if I wasn't secure in my own self I would take this as a major problem and try to show him that I DO NOT want everything my way - in doing so he gets his way even more and gets me even more under his thumb.
It is OK for him to be a pathological lier and compulsive bullshitter - he demands that people tell the absolute truth to him
It is OK for him to force himself to the center of attention - but anyone trying to get a word in edgewise is accused of 'butting in' and 'trying to annoy people with your useless talk"
It is OK for him to take what he wants from anyone - but don't even *think* of joking about touching something of his!
He states that he is a Native American Shaman,, but he enjoys telling stories of how when he was 'overseas' he was in the thick of warfare and enjoyed killing people. Shamans / Priests / Spiritual Leaders normally do not 'enjoy' killing people. They promote peace and understanding (most of the time).
If you offer something to him for a temp use - he takes the item and hides it in his stuff, and when you go retrieve said item he gets all screammy and temper tantrum at you. Trying to make you feel like the 'bad person'.
BUT!!
If he gives you something you are to realize he is only giving it to you until he wants / needs it back and you are to give it back to him without a whimper - no matter what he said when he gave it to you.
He gets jobs and then his personality really comes out and he sabotages his job and then complains it wasn't HIS fault he lost it, or it was someone who hates him, or the moon was in the wrong quarter.
I allowed his behavior because I was getting a 'friendship' of sorts out of it. Now it has gone beyond my limits and I find that I don't really care if he talks to me or not.... his choice.
Many of my friends have been supportive towards me about housemate. Now I see what they have been gently saying about him.
Now I have a choice - screwed up housemate or all my friends
SNORT!! no choice!
Friends will never yell at you for being yourself, friends will not try to take over your life and then get upset when you don't follow their advice to the letter, friends will tell you where to go and then later get told to go to the same place, friends understand that you need to do things your own way and won't demand that you ignore your own feelings and do it someone else's way. Friends understand and accept you the way you are - not the way they want yu to be.
A True Friend Knows All About You and Likes You Anyway!!
I spent 2 years with a Mental & Emotional Abuser who was passive-aggressive ... I WILL NOT play that game again! Not unless I allow it - and on MY terms!
Does anyone know of a Animal Shelter that will take this 30+ year old immature, little snot?? I will not burden a person with his behaviors, so I figure he can live with the other animals.