Talking some sense into myself
As one of the last few people in Sweden, it is finally my turn to get sick with Covid-19. It suuucks!
I've also been having some hysterical obsessive thoughts. I want to be good, I want to deserve my friends, to be a part of society, and not be judged. And I - recently - have had these fantasies about my co-workers discovering the evil things I've done and excommunicating me from society, or worse, telling me I don't deserve to live. Those evil things I've done?
Reading Dead Dove fanfic on the Supernatural kink meme years ago. I definitely regret it; I definitely feel bad about it, and today I take great care with the fanfiction I read so I don't read anything that upsets me. (I'm great at minding the tags.) But *insert sarcastic voice*: Imagine dying over SPN fanfic lmao.