gotta keep my eyes from the circling skies
I'm so thankful for the few close friends I have. Elizabitch talked to me last night for a while and helped me try to deal w/ some issues and power struggles I'm having with myself and gave me some good advice. She makes me so happy b/c she gets me. Many thanks to her for being there and just knowing how I operate.
Also, many thanks to Blake b/c me and him are always on the same level and always seem to help each other out of whatever we're dealing with. I just wish I could help him more than I have b/c he's going through a rough time w/ a mutual friend and I just hope he figures out what it will take to make him happy and to realize that he has to stop worrying about others and making them happy.
Also, to Grant just b/c he's such an awesome person and we're both going through a funk right now and it's good to know that someone else is trying to figure out what the hell we want in life. Much <3 to you!
I'm so glad that I've finally hit that spot in my life where I'm over petty shit, over the useless and worthless friends that don't do anything except bring you strife, over stressing about the little things in life; just plain done w/ it all. I want to be happy. I want things in life that will bring me joy and happiness w/o breaking my neck to have to get to that point. I want to settle down completely. I really want to finish school and find a good job and be on my own. I'm ready for the simplicity of life... sitting outside and watch the wind blow by just like the Tim McGraw song. I'm tired of being in funks. I'm tired of feelings like I have a huge void to fill. I'm going to take what I have and do the best I can with it.
I'm ready to end a certain relationship and as much as it pains me to do so... it's time. I mean how much longer can this keep going on? We've lost what we originally had. The friendship died a long time ago and my head was clouded by hopes of it returning... but the haze has lifted and I can see clearly now. I'm just making a fool out of myself to continue this. Now, if only I could actually make myself do it...
We just gotta realize.. we'll be okay. Things will be OKAY. I just want to grab some random person's face and just look them in the eye like in Donnie Darko and tell them that everything will be okay b/c right now I feel like that. If you lose a friend, yes it will hurt, yes it's going to suck.. but you will be ok. You'll eventually get over it. If the friendship is meant to be, it'll be. Not one person can keep the friendship alive. It just doesn't work like that. I'm tired of doing the work. And I'm finally seeing the light!! As much as it hurts, I'm not trying anymore.
I'm proud of myself right now. I hope the way I'm thinking doesn't change anytime soon.
Also, many thanks to Blake b/c me and him are always on the same level and always seem to help each other out of whatever we're dealing with. I just wish I could help him more than I have b/c he's going through a rough time w/ a mutual friend and I just hope he figures out what it will take to make him happy and to realize that he has to stop worrying about others and making them happy.
Also, to Grant just b/c he's such an awesome person and we're both going through a funk right now and it's good to know that someone else is trying to figure out what the hell we want in life. Much <3 to you!
I'm so glad that I've finally hit that spot in my life where I'm over petty shit, over the useless and worthless friends that don't do anything except bring you strife, over stressing about the little things in life; just plain done w/ it all. I want to be happy. I want things in life that will bring me joy and happiness w/o breaking my neck to have to get to that point. I want to settle down completely. I really want to finish school and find a good job and be on my own. I'm ready for the simplicity of life... sitting outside and watch the wind blow by just like the Tim McGraw song. I'm tired of being in funks. I'm tired of feelings like I have a huge void to fill. I'm going to take what I have and do the best I can with it.
I'm ready to end a certain relationship and as much as it pains me to do so... it's time. I mean how much longer can this keep going on? We've lost what we originally had. The friendship died a long time ago and my head was clouded by hopes of it returning... but the haze has lifted and I can see clearly now. I'm just making a fool out of myself to continue this. Now, if only I could actually make myself do it...
We just gotta realize.. we'll be okay. Things will be OKAY. I just want to grab some random person's face and just look them in the eye like in Donnie Darko and tell them that everything will be okay b/c right now I feel like that. If you lose a friend, yes it will hurt, yes it's going to suck.. but you will be ok. You'll eventually get over it. If the friendship is meant to be, it'll be. Not one person can keep the friendship alive. It just doesn't work like that. I'm tired of doing the work. And I'm finally seeing the light!! As much as it hurts, I'm not trying anymore.
I'm proud of myself right now. I hope the way I'm thinking doesn't change anytime soon.