Done with....Boys
I am so done with everything...I'm just done with love. I don't know if maybe it's just not the right time for me, or if I am really not ready for it--but it all lets me down time and time again. I mean, yeah I have had some fun relationships, and I've fallen in love...but it doesn't end well--EVER! The most recent was Andrew and we all know what happened there. I wanted so much more from him--but honestly, he was too young to even understand what I wanted and what I needed from a relationship, and until he figures it out, we can't be anything more than friends--not that we do that very well. We never seem to last as friends, because there is always that tension between us--it kinda sucks sometimes. It is so easy to fall back into the same old pattern and habits again--ya know. I don't necessarily want that though--I'm sick of it, because it always ends the same. I finally told nick and andrew both that I don't want to be with them to just be with them--I want more. Oh god, then there is Ryan--yeah I never expected he and I to work out like this--so dumb. I thought that since he was older that he would be more mature about it all, but oh was I wrong. Ugh, I would like to date him, but well honestly it will probably be better off with us just kinda pretending that what we did never happened--I hate doing that, but I think that he regrets it, oh well. *sigh* boys.
**Well atleast I can say that I learned A LOT from these boys:
1. Never date someone younger than you, especially when you are mature for your age.
2. Don't expect a relationship to go from friends with benefits to a real relationship--doesn't happen.
3. Don't do anything with someone that is related to one of your best friends.
4. Ignore when a boy says he loves you--especially when alcohol is involved.
5. If a boy tries to be with you while he is with someone else, walk away--because that is NEVER a good sign!
6. Don't get drunk with an ex, that you are trying to be "just friends" with.
7. Alcohol+Ex+Car=Bad Morning
8. In work relationships NEVER WORK
9. Stay away from people who view things like drugs, or video games as more important that the girl they're dating: It will end BADLY!
10. Avoid boys that keep you a secret from their friends, there are only two reasons for that: *They're trying to see other people behind your back, or * they are ashamed of you. Either way it's not good.
Well that is enough of that--I'm out.
I should most definately look into taking Andre up on his suggestion--no more boys....time to try a different kind of relationship.