I wandered lonely as a cloud...
I've always loved spending time alone. I like time to myself. I don't tend to feel lonely unless it's serious.
But this is just getting ridiculous.
It's just B and I in the house right now. B works full-time, and I'm still waiting for my job to start, so I'm on my own for around 9 hours every day. Before now I probably would have thought it was heaven... Instead I feel lonely. Not just a little either - I mean full-on heartwrenching lonely.
I've always been someone who knows a lot of people but has a small number of very close friends. Now I'm in York, that'd be my housemates, Jo and Sameena. Most of my friends from high school wanted new starts and those that didn't either didn't contact me or I didn't contact them. Well, it was both, actually.
I don't have the internet to distract myself, and I don't want to constantly use the TV and PS2, because we're trying to save money on the electricity.
So, of course, I'm bored and lonely. And when I'm bored I tend to brood.
Not. Good.
Although, the time alone has benefits. Even the boredom does... I did do some drawing for the first time in a year. It was good too - I expected to be really rusty but it was as good as when I was in year 11 and finishing Zoe's portrait. I've had time to sort my overdraft and some things we needed for the house. And I've been doing more singing and things... At this rate I might even start jogging or something!
But... I want someone around. I want to talk to someone, go shopping or for walks or something. I think if I told B how I feel she'd be happy to make time at the weekend, but she has other friends here - most for her Jitsu club seems to have stayed. I don't want to be a pest.
Glarg. What I need to do is stop my effing whigning... Sorry, peoples.