Red Hand Days - Chapter 11
Title/writer/warnings/yadayadas: RHD, me, gayfaggots, foreverwip
Oh and happy b-day to xxkogainugamixx! This chapter is for you! ...If you like it. If not... it's for... the official... spank day?
11.
“Kashim!”
The sight of Gauron sitting at the kitchen table, smiling widely and spreading his arms made Kashim's skin crawl. There was an empty plate in front of Gauron, Alex's breakfast eggs. A rifle rested on the man's lap and the pool of blood under Alex had already stopped growing. There were three other men in the kitchen, all new.
“What?” Gauron asked confused and dropped his arms. “No hug?”
Kashim just stared at him. He couldn't look at Alex. He didn't want to admit that the man was dead. “Why did you kill him?” his voice was merely a whisper. There was something stuck in his throat again, which Kashim now recognized as a cry.
Gauron was still for a moment and then pretended to remember Alex. “Oh him?”
“DO YOU SEE ANYONE ELSE DEAD HERE?!” Kashim shouted at the top of his lungs, startling one of the new men. The rage inside Kashim's chest was nothing he had ever felt before. His breathing was hitched and his vision was getting blurry again.
Alex had promised to get him away. Alex had tended his wounds and... And now he was lying there. Alex hadn't done anything wrong compared to all the others. If something, Gauron should have been grateful for Alex.
Gauron cocked his head and stared at Kashim. “Are you crying? For him?” Gauron sounded disgusted.
“Fuck you”, Kashim spat and turned his head to wipe one of his eyes.
Gauron's head jerked back. “Well look who grew balls the minute I was gone.” He took some papers from the table without looking at them. “What are these?”
Kashim glanced at the plane tickets and his new passport. He didn't answer. That's why. That's the reason Alex was dead.
Gauron flipped the passport open. “I don't know who the fuck... Sagara Sousuke is,” he pronounced the name with care. “Or why he would go to Japan and frankly I don't give a fuck, but what I do give a fuck about is that there's your picture here.” He turned the passport to Kashim. Alex had made fun of his face in the picture. He had said Kashim looked constipated.
Kashim turned his eyes to Gauron. “I don't know what those are”, he said coldly.
Gauron stood up with such a speed, the chair he had been sitting on flew several meters backwards. “BULLSHIT!” Instantly he was standing right in front of Kashim, glaring down at him. Kashim stared back calmly. For some reason he didn't fear Gauron. Not after all he had been through lately. There was a deep silence in the whole apartment. Gauron's eyes narrowed and he tilted his head again. “Did he fuck you?”
Kashim had a severe urge to say yes, just to piss Gauron off. But the truth was, that Alex had already been killed and in a fit of rage Kashim could be too. “No.”
“Did you want him to?”
Kashim cursed himself when he felt his cheeks get hotter. Gauron wouldn't miss a signal like that. “I had a dream about it, but not really”, Kashim admitted with a shrug.
It seemed to take Gauron by surprise. “You had a sex dream? About him?!” The same disgusted tone was there again.
“Would it have been better if it was about Kaminski?” Kashim asked calmly and knew that this at least would change the subject.
Gauron relaxed a little. He was about to say something, but glanced at the new men instead. “Wait at the cars”, he said and the men left. Gauron placed his hand on Kashim's shoulder and led him to the bedroom. Kashim didn't object, since anywhere was better than the kitchen with Alex. “I heard you've had a little rough time.”
“If Vostrikov hadn't taken my gun, everything would have been okay”, Kashim said and decided to put at least some of the blame and Gauron's anger on Vostrikov. The rest Gauron could kill anyway, but Vostrikov was most likely to get out with just blaming the others. “He said I was unstable.”
“You? Nooo!” Gauron gasped, but the tone was mocking. He sat on the bed. “But he did make a shitty call, I'll talk with him about it.”
“What about the others?” Were they already dead or had Gauron wanted Kashim to witness the killing.
“We'll talk about it later. I will make them pay”, Gauron promised with a sigh and started to open his pants. “Now how about that welcome back gift?”
Kashim stared at the man for a second, before turning around. “I don't do that anymore”, he said and walked to the living room to get his jacket.
It took awhile for Gauron to follow him. “What?” It sounded like Gauron had never heard those words before and didn't quite know what they meant.
“What?” Kashim asked and was proud of his fake confusion.
“You don't do that anymore?”
“Yes”, Kashim confirmed. “I don't like it.”
Gauron was clearly out of words. It was actually quite a funny sight. Alex would've loved it. “Let me guess,” he said finally. “Geary told you to say that?”
Now Kashim was genuinely confused. “Who's Geary?”
“That fucking dead limp dick in the kitchen!”
Kashim frowned. “He didn't tell me to say anything. I just don't do it anymore.”
Gauron's hand grasped Kashim's throat in a tight squeeze. “I don't remember giving you options.”
Kashim didn't lift his hands to his throat or try to pry the fingers off and sure enough Gauron's grip loosened. He pushed Kashim away and frowned. “What the fuck's wrong with you?”
“I'm fucking done with this”, Kashim said, holding his sore throat and walked past Gauron. “Leave me be or kill me too, I don't give a fuck either way.”
**
The whole convoy was outside, the trucks with the arm slaves and everything. It seemed Gauron had hired at least ten new men too, so they would probably go do something big. Kashim walked past his usual truck and climbed in when he saw a truck with only some new guys in it. Most of them looked like Russians.
Gauron didn't come to the same truck. The engines started to roar and the trucks took off swaying and rumbling. All Kashim could think for several hours was Alex and how he had yelled at the man the last time they had seen each other.
“Are you the other AS pilot?”
Kashim lifted his eyes to a blond haired soldier maybe only few years older than him. He nodded to the man sitting on the opposite side of the truck. The blonde reached his gloved hand across the truck to Kashim. “Good to meet you. Kurz Weber.”
Kashim took the hand and shook it. “Kashim”, he mumbled.
“I'm a sharpshooter”, the man went on, now with a wide smile. “I have a whole load of kick-ass rifles with me”, he said and patted a large case under the bench. When Kashim didn't reply, the man continued to talk. “I'm not a Russian or anything, you probably notice from the accent, but hell Gauron pays well for an easy job, so...” No response. “I'm actually from Germany.” Nothing from Kashim. “You know where that is?”
Kashim shook his head a little.
It seemed to be all the man needed for a whole lecture about geography, Europe, Germany and how the man had ended up here. Few other guys joined his blabber so Kashim just toned out.
“So, Kashim. Tell us about Gauron.”
Kashim's head snapped up. All the others were staring at him.
“I mean, we all know he's a bad-ass and not to be fucked with, but anything else?” Weber asked, still smiling for some reason.
“He'll probably shoot half of you at the end of the mission, so he doesn't have to pay you”, Kashim said quietly and was grateful for the silence.
The trucks stopped few hours before sundown. Kashim got out with the rest of the men and started to unload the tents and supplies. He didn't get much done before Gauron walked to him.
“Kashim.”
Kashim put the box he had been carrying to the ground and turned to the man. Gauron walked next to him and put his arm on his shoulders. “We're going to get us some Mujahids for the Ruskies, clean up few of the caves for a good amount of cash. Now, this is a big operation and I need every man I have, okay? I can't kill any of them right now and neither can you, you got that?”
So the assholes that had jumped Kashim and almost killed him wouldn't be harmed. Yet. Kashim didn't answer.
Gauron's hand grabbed his shoulder. “No killing until the job's done, okay?”
“Roger”, Kashim said, even though he imagined gunning Kaminski and the others down with the smallest excuse.
“Good.” Gauron patted his shoulder. “Do you want to set up my tent?”
Kashim glanced at the man. “I can set it up, but I'm not sleeping in it. The new guys said they have room in their tent.” He gestured towards the men from his truck. Weber was setting up a fire and the others were unpacking food and the large tent they would sleep in.
“Oh. Well isn't that nice”, Gauron said with a smile. “You're making friends finally. That's good. But come sleep in my tent anyway”, the man said, patted Kashim's back again and left towards the AS trucks.
Kashim picked up the crate he had been carrying and walked to Weber. The man opened the crate, took food cans from it and started to set up the cooking gear.
“What was that about?” Weber asked, only quickly glancing at Kashim.
Kashim sat down and kept staring at the flames, feeding few branches to the fire. He didn't feel like talking about his stuff with Weber. They weren't friends or anything, no matter what Gauron said.
“Not much of a talker, huh?” Weber went on, grinning. Kashim glanced at the man, but remained silent. “So, are the things I heard about Gauron and you true?”
For a while Kashim had hoped he wouldn't have to go through this again with the new guys. He had hoped that maybe all that would be over now and he could be just a soldier like everyone else. Gauron would get bored with him and go on with his life and Kashim could do the same.
“Depends on what you've heard, I guess”, Kashim said tiredly. Maybe Weber didn't have the balls to start repeating all the things he had heard about Gauron fucking him in the public.
“You know, that you're his son.”
A piece of wood cracked in the fire and sent sparkles to the air. Kashim stared at the flames and tried to assess if he had heard the man right. Son? What. The. Fuck?
“Where did you hear that?” From the millions of questions it was the first to come out.
“Just something I picked up along the way. Is it true?”
Kashim was about to say no, because that was the truth, but he was hit with some doubt. He didn't actually know who his parents were. Had been. He had been told they were dead. Died in a plane crash or something and that's how he had ended up in Afghanistan in the first place. Scavenging the streets of Kabul, until Gauron had caught him stealing their food and brought him in.
“No”, Kashim said, but couldn't hide the horrible doubt in his mind. “My parents are dead.”
“Oh. Sorry”, Weber said with a frown. “Well, you know rumours. I just thought, you know, you being taken into the group as a kid and trained to be the other pilot and Gauron pretty much never leaving your side...” Weber shrugged and turned his eyes back to the food. “It all seemed to fit to me.” Weber stirred the food and moved it further away from the flames. “Do you remember your parents?”
“No”, Kashim answered. He didn't remember a lot before Gauron. Just that he had been hungry all the time and the bombings had scared him.
When the tents were up and the guard duties settled, the men gathered for supper. There was clearly two groups forming; the new guys and the old ones. Kashim stayed with the new ones, Gauron was mostly with the old.
As the night went on the talking got dirtier and the stories longer. Kashim stood up at one point, just wanting to be alone for a second. He walked past the trucks to the edge of the dirt road and then just stared into the wasteland. Gauron had came back. Everything was back to normal. More or less. The thought was dulling.
As the sun went down the desert got cold quickly. Not feeling like joining the others at the camp, Kashim climbed into the cockpit of one of the trucks. It was slightly warmer there and he could be alone. Maybe Gauron would even forget his order about the sleeping arrangements and just left him be. Kashim lifted his legs to the edge of the bench and tucked his hands in his armpits to keep them warmer. He sat there for hours, just staring at the night outside the wind-shield. Occasionally a burst of laughter or a bang of a truck door pulled him from his thoughts, but other than that he was not disturbed. Not until several hours after he had drifted into sleep.
The truck door opened and startled Kashim awake. Gauron climbed in and sat behind the wheel, turning towards Kashim.
“Why are you sleeping here? The others giving you a hard time again?”
“No...” Kashim mumbled and felt a shiver pass through him. The truck had gotten cold during the night and the tips of Kashim's fingers were getting numb. He rubbed his sleepy eyes. “Just felt like being alone.”
Gauron reached his hand behind the benches and pulled out a blanket. He tossed it to Kashim and watched him wrap it around himself. “You got food?”
“Yeah.”
There was a long silence. Kashim stared out of the windscreen and Gauron stared at him. “Come here for a second”, Gauron said and lifted his arm a little to invite Kashim closer. They shared a look and Gauron rolled his eyes. “For fuck's sake, I missed you, just come here for a second. I've barely been able to talk to you since I came back.”
For some reason Weber's words kept haunting Kashim. He stared at Gauron with a whole new way, searching for any similarities in the two of them. He could find none. Gauron was large in every way, Kashim was not. Kashim had only looked at himself from a mirror few times in his life, but he knew Gauron had a completely different nose than him. Their eyes were different too, even the shade of their skin.
“What?” Gauron snapped, getting tired of being stared at.
“Weber told me there's a rumour going on that you're my father”, Kashim said bluntly.
Gauron only frowned. “Who the fuck's Weber?”
“The blond sharpshooter. German.”
“Oh. Right. The kraut.” Gauron fell silent.
Kashim waited, but Gauron didn't say anything more. “Well?”
“What?” Gauron asked and smiled then. “Am I?” He lifted his arm to rest on top of the steering-wheel. “What difference does it make to you? You don't know fuck about parents or family. They are just words for you.”
Kashim clenched his teeth. Why couldn't he just give him a straight answer. It would have been a lot easier. Gauron's hand reached to ruffle Kashim's hair, but the boy pulled his head back avoiding the touch.
“Parents provide their children food and safety. Family keeps together and defends one another. Now tell me, what are the differences between a team and a family?”
Kashim was silent. He didn't know anything about families, so he didn't know if there were any differences. He had seen a lot of kids and some the men he had met during his life had kids, but... It didn't really mean anything. They were just the same as everyone else. Although the kids with parents usually had a place to sleep and food tot eat. Unlike Kashim during his early years.
“Does it bother you if people think we're related? It will keep you safer from now on.”
“I don't want to be like you”, Kashim said truthfully and turned his eyes to meet Gauron's. That was one of the few things he knew about parents and kids. They usually resembled one another.
The man just scoffed. “Now you're just trying to hurt my feelings. What else could you possibly want.”
“So it's just a rumour then?” Kashim decided to make sure. He was pretty sure he hadn't gotten a real answers yet.
“Just tell them to come and ask me, if anyone's interested. That you don't give a fuck either way. That's the truth in the end.”
Kashim turned his head back to face the windscreen.
“You don't need complicated shit like that to stress about, believe me. You're a simple person and that's absolutely nothing to be ashamed about.” Gauron moved closer and lifted his hand to place it to the back of Kashim's neck. The thumb caressed the tender skin.“It makes you my best soldier, Kashim, no matter what those jealous assholes say. And related or not I have never cared for anyone like I care for you. And that will never change, you can count on it. No matter what happens, the two of us will always remain together.”
Kashim knew Gauron was - for some reason - trying to make him feel better, but the words he spoke just sounded like a threat.
“What happened with Kaminski?” Gauron asked suddenly.
“They haven't told you?” Kashim doubted that. He was sure Kaminski and the others had told Gauron some bullshit the second he returned.
“I've heard their side of it. And Vostrikov's. I haven't heard yours, so let's have it. It's probably closest to the truth anyway.” Gauron pulled his hand away and went back on resting his arm on the steering wheel, his torso turned towards Kashim.
Kashim shrugged, like the whole ordeal wasn't anything to talk about. “They came asking Vostrikov one night, drunk, and started to talk about beating me. I had my gun then, so I got them to leave by threatening to shoot Kaminski's balls off.” It got a laughter out of Gauron, of course. “But after that Vostrikov took my gun away and they came back. They gassed the house and beat me. They were talking about killing me and tried to...” Kashim stopped talking, when he remembered the tracking chip. Alex had taken it out and it was still in Kashim's pocket.
“They tried to what?” Gauron's face was an unreadable and unnerving mask.
Did Gauron know the chip was gone? He knew about Alex taking care of Kashim. And that Alex had planned their escape. Now, if--
“Kashim!” Gauron barked and interrupted Kashim's thoughts. “Keep talking.”
They both knew Kashim wasn't a quick thinker. He needed enough time to reach conclusions and make decisions about lying and how he should lie and about what exact things. The only thing Gauron had to do to keep Kashim from lying, was to keep him talking.
“Quick, quick!” Gauron snapped and clapped his hands loudly.
“They tried to carve the chip from my back,” Kashim said even though he knew it was the wrong thing to do. He just didn't have enough time to come up with anything else. He knew it was the best if Gauron didn't know about the chip being gone. It would give Kashim advantage, when he did decide to escape.
“Did they get it?”
“No.”
“And Geary stitched you back up.”
Kashim was about to say that Alex hadn't taken the chip out either. He already had his mouth open and now his brains were trying to catch up with him. “Yes”, he managed finally.
Gauron was silent for awhile. “Let's see it then.” When Kashim remained still, with a questioning look on his face, Gauron rolled his eyes. “Your back. Let's see how much they fucked you up.”
Kashim turned sideways on the bench and took off his jacket and then the wife-beater. Gauron reached towards the ceiling and flipped on a light before moving closer. “Motherfuckers...” the man mumbled and placed his hand between Kashim's shoulder blades. The scars were still fresh and the edges of the wounds had barely healed close. But it wasn't like Gauron had never inflicted any scars himself. Hell, Kashim had probably tens of them. “I'm going to rip their heads off and piss into their windpipes.” The heavy hand caressed over the scars. “Does it hurt still?”
Kashim shook his head. He couldn't deny it didn't feel good to have someone acknowledge the wrongness he had endured. It felt good to have someone say he had the right to feel betrayed.
“We're going to make them pay, make no mistake about it. You will get to kill them.”
Kashim was about to say he didn't want that. He wanted to say he was above things like that. That he wasn't bitter or angry. He found himself staring into the wasteland and then turning towards Gauron. They stared at each other for a short while. “I just want to kill Kaminski”, Kashim said quietly, admitting to himself he wanted revenge. “Now.”
Gauron smiled lazily. “I need everyone right now.”
Kashim gritted his teeth. He remembered the feeling of being suffocated by the gas, even after sticking his head into the water basin and almost forcing him to drown himself. The feeling of the knife on his back, cutting his flesh. “I want to shoot him now”, Kashim stated in determined and cold voice.
Gauron placed his palm against Kashim's cheek and leaned in to kiss him. Kashim let him, even opened his mouth slightly to let Gauron's tongue into his mouth. The kiss deepened and Gauron's hand sneaked around Kashim's head to rest on the back of his neck. Their tongues pushed against each other, Kashim could taste the familiar mixture of tobacco and vodka. After awhile Gauron pulled an inch back, keeping his face in front of Kashim's. “I fucking love it when you lose your shit and start your killing rampages, but I need two sharpshooters right now.”
Kashim stared at the man coldly and noted Gauron's pistol on his belt. Hesitating only momentarily Kashim leaned back in to kiss Gauron. He reached towards Gauron's pistol and bit the man's lower lip at the same time his fingers touched the gun. Gauron only chuckled and sighed as Kashim deepened the kiss. The gun was already halfway out of the holster.
“Turn off the light”, Kashim pleaded in a whisper.
Gauron turned his eyes and reached towards the light switch. In a second Kashim had yanked the gun to himself and opened his side of the door. Gauron's hand tried to grasp him, but the man was too slow, Kashim was out of the truck and running towards the camp. Only thing he could think of was Kaminski laughing at him, kicking him, mocking him, making him feel like an idiot.
“Kashim! KASHIM!”
Kashim ignored Gauron's shouts and kept running. There was a shuffle around the camp fire as the men tried to make out what was happening in the dark. Kashim ran straight towards Kaminski, jumping over few crates on the ground.
He saw the man getting pale as he saw the gun in Kashim's hand. Kaminski had the time to stand up and then Kashim was there, pointing the pistol at his skull.
“The fuck are you doing?” the man shouted, holding up his hands. His voice was shaking badly.
“Kashim! Don't do it!” Gauron bellowed behind him, but not bothering to run.
“Gauron! Jesus!” There was panic in Kaminski's voice as he turned his watering eyes towards Gauron. Kashim stared at the man, swearing to himself that no one, fucking no one, would ever attack him like that again.
“Kashim!” Gauron shouted again. “Don't--!”
Kashim pulled the trigger. The bullet hit Kaminski's forehead and the sand behind him was plastered with blood and brain pieces. The man toppled down as the echo of the shot bounced around the rocky terrain around them. There was no other sound. The others were sitting as still as possible. Kashim lowered his gun and felt a rush of relief.
Gauron stepped to him and backhanded Kashim across his face. Kashim didn't even flinch even though the blood started to flow from his nose and dripped to his bare chest. “Fucking lunatic”, Gauron huffed and picked up his gun, shoving it back to the holster. He grabbed Kashim by his shoulder and pushed him to walk towards his tent. “Get rid of the body!” he shouted at the remaining men.
It was chilly and dark in Gauron's tent since he had banned the use of stoves for their weight. When the winter came they would be stuck in towns and villages for months. Kashim wrapped his arms around himself and sat down on top of the sleeping mats and bags.
“You fucking asshole!” Gauron shouted and kicked one of the backpacks over. “Where the fuck am I supposed to get another sharpshooter now, huh?!” he shouted, bending closer to Kashim's face. “Answer me?!”
Kashim opened his mouth, knowing fully well there were no correct answers at the moment. “We can recruit another one”, Kashim said quietly. It didn't matter to him. The only thing that mattered was that Kaminski was dead and now none of the others would ever have the guts to mock him.
“The fuck we can!” Gauron shouted. “I told you, you could kill him later! When the fucking job was done!”
“He was a shitty sharpshooter anyway, what do you--”
Gauron attacked him with amazing speed, straddling over him and his hands seizing Kashim by the throat. He leaned closer and had a somewhat crazed look on his face. “I fucking told you 'no'”, he said calmly, his voice dripping with venom. “I should just snap your little disobeying neck right now and be done with you.”
Kashim waited calmly if the man would carry out his threat, but nothing happened.
Slowly Gauron unclasped his hands and sighed, straightening himself up but not getting off Kashim. “I have neglected you for too long, I know. It's my fault.” Gauron placed his hand against Kashim's cheek and lifted the corner of his mouth unhappily. “I should've been here, like I should've been with you in Singapore. Shit, Kashim, I'm sorry. You've had to go through so much shit because of me.”
Kashim lifted an eyebrow. Gauron was so unbelievably unpredictable it could've easily been terrifying. It probably was to the most of the team. Kashim had already learned Gauron's boundaries, at least when it came to Kashim. Gauron could hit him, he could make him suffer, but he wouldn't kill him. Gauron could say he was sorry and that everything would be okay and not meaning a word he said. He could be yelling at one moment and...
Gauron leaned down and started to lick the blood off from Kashim's chest. The hot tongue started between Kashim's pecs, working it's way up towards the collarbones. Kashim stared at the dark canopy ceiling of the tent and remained perfectly still. He couldn't help but jump a little as Gauron's tongue found it's way to one of his nipples. The man chuckled against his skin, smoothing the side of Kashim's torso with his hand. “Don't worry. I'm here now and we'll go through once again why you are going to do everything exactly like I tell you to.”
Gauron moved up to face Kashim and started to lick the blood from the boy's nose.
“Stop it”, Kashim mumbled and turned his head away. He lifted his hand to wipe the remaining blood away, but Gauron grasped his wrist and hit it against the ground.
“Are you giving me orders, you little pissant? You? A fucking homicidal wackjob?”
“I'm sorry”, Kashim sighed, his head still turned to aside.
Gauron took a hold of his face and turned Kashim to face him. “Do it properly, like you mean it.”
Kashim stared at the man. He had never gotten the difference, but it was something to do with tones of voice and eye contact. “I'm sorry”, he said again, sounding exactly the same to himself.
Gauron seemed pleased. “Good. Now get up and take off your pants. I want to watch you.” The man moved away to give Kashim some space. They both sat up and Gauron started to go through one of the backpacks. He pulled out a bottle of vodka and turned his eyes to Kashim. “Well go on. Get up.”
Kashim hesitated. “I'm not going to have sex with you”, he reminded. “I told you, I don't do it anymore.”
“I asked you to take off your fucking pants. Are you going to do it or are we going to have a fight about it? Those are your choices”, Gauron informed calmly and opened his bottle. “Choose.”
For a moment Kashim wondered if Gauron would beat him up just after he had apologised about the others doing that. There was no doubt about it. Gauron and logic didn't fit in to the same frame if there was already sex there.
“We're going to start from the basics, since you seem to have forgotten them. I tell you what to do and you do it, without any bullshit. You don't start to negotiate, you don't start killing people, you don't run away and you don't talk back.” Gauron sipped the vodka straight from the bottle. “Take off your pants or I'll drag you out and whip you in front of everyone.”
Kashim eyes grew wider and he tensed up. Gauron had whipped him only once and only with three strikes, but at the time it had been more than enough to quell his rebellious thoughts for almost three years. He stood up.
Gauron smiled and took a more relaxed posture, leaning his back against the backpacks. “Come closer.” He patted the ground just next to him. “I want you right in front of me.”
Kashim stepped forward and Gauron yanked him closer by his belt. Kashim ended up standing in front of Gauron, his feet on both sides of the man and his crotch just inches away from Gauron's face.
“That's better”, Gauron mused and inhaled deeply. He lifted his hand to cup Kashim's clothed genitals and massaged them lightly. “You're doing very good. Now, open your pants.” Kashim dropped his hands to his belt, but Gauron placed his own hands on top of his. “Very slowly. Like you were disarming a mine.”
The metaphor made Kashim stop. It was one of the few cases when he understood exactly what Gauron wanted. He still didn't understand exactly why Gauron would want him to act like that, but at least he knew what to do. He placed his hands on his belt buckle and started to loosen the end of the belt. With a gentle flick of his finger he undid the prong and worked the belt through the frame. Gauron's hand had moved to massage his left thigh.
Kashim let the belt droop open as he moved his fingers to unbutton his pants. He pulled his zipper down one tooth at a time. His palms were sweating and Kashim had to remind himself that he wasn't actually undoing a mine here. His pants were open and hanging loosely around his hips. Gauron moved his hand inside his pants to feel his genitals again, now through the thin fabric of his briefs.
“You have no idea how fucking sexy you are”, Gauron whispered. Kashim could only agree since he had no idea of anything concerning Gauron and sex and that was just fine by him. “Turn around.”
Kashim obeyed without saying a word and felt Gauron's hands on his buttocks. The man reached his fingertips inside Kashim's trousers and pulled them down, briefs and all. It was dim in the tent, but it didn't seem to bother Gauron. He pressed his hand against Kashim's skin, going through every inch of his ass with his hands, grabbing and feeling it. His thumb pressed against Kashim's tail bone and went downwards from there, ending up on his hole.
Kashim kept staring at the door of the tent, fearing that some idiotic rookie would walk in any moment. He didn't know what he had been expecting Gauron to do, but when he felt the soft kiss against his ass cheek, Kashim knew he hadn't expected that. Gauron's rough stubble was scratching against his skin and the thumb kept massaging the muscles on his opening.
“On your hands and knees”, Gauron muttered, his mouth hovering hotly over the wet skin. Kashim lowered himself down and bit his teeth together. He reminded himself that this would be far less painful and humiliating than being whipped and fucked in front of the others.
But Gauron didn't start to fuck him. There was a unnerving silence and then Gauron shifted behind Kashim. A quick and painful slap caused Kashim to startle and shout out. Gauron's hand grabbed his hair and yanked Kashim's head up. “You've been a bad boy, Kashim. A very bad boy. You don't kill people without permission. You do not decide who lives or dies, that's my job.” He yanked Kashim's hair and slapped his ass again. The hit was far from gentle and Kashim knew he would have a hard time sitting, if the man would go on. “Is this clear?”
“Y-yes, sir”, Kashim breathed out, trying his best to block what he could from the pain.
“Say it!” Gauron barked and hit him again.
“I don't.. decide.. who dies!” Kashim managed between the next several slaps. Gauron's wrist was loose and the hit came with the full power of his palm, covering the whole cheek. Kashim kept pressing his eyes and mouth close so he wouldn't cry out, but jesus did it hurt.
“Apologise to me.” Another hit that caused Kashim to bite the inside of his cheek.
“I'm sorry”, he begged, tasting the blood in his mouth. “Please stop.”
“Does it hurt?” Gauron's voice was softer now, the man leaning over Kashim's body.
“Yes.” Kashim took no shame about admitting it. Gauron knew how to hit hard and painfully.
“You have to promise me you will behave from now on”, Gauron said smiling, smoothing the raw skin of Kashim's ass with his hand. “Daddy's home and in this family we have rules to follow.”
** ** **
A/N: yeeeeah... I'm pretty sure Gauron's not his biological father, no matter how AU this turns out to be. But then again I have very little control over these faggots anymore, so who fucking knows.. Anyway, it's more likely that Gauron just likes the idea of someone being tied so closely to him. ...Sick fucker. ... Aw what the hell, Gauron's hot as hell. I promise he's not going to go anywhere ever again. *squeeeeezes Gauron-sama* *and probably gets his head shot off* OK, I'll shut up now.
Oh and happy b-day to xxkogainugamixx! This chapter is for you! ...If you like it. If not... it's for... the official... spank day?
11.
“Kashim!”
The sight of Gauron sitting at the kitchen table, smiling widely and spreading his arms made Kashim's skin crawl. There was an empty plate in front of Gauron, Alex's breakfast eggs. A rifle rested on the man's lap and the pool of blood under Alex had already stopped growing. There were three other men in the kitchen, all new.
“What?” Gauron asked confused and dropped his arms. “No hug?”
Kashim just stared at him. He couldn't look at Alex. He didn't want to admit that the man was dead. “Why did you kill him?” his voice was merely a whisper. There was something stuck in his throat again, which Kashim now recognized as a cry.
Gauron was still for a moment and then pretended to remember Alex. “Oh him?”
“DO YOU SEE ANYONE ELSE DEAD HERE?!” Kashim shouted at the top of his lungs, startling one of the new men. The rage inside Kashim's chest was nothing he had ever felt before. His breathing was hitched and his vision was getting blurry again.
Alex had promised to get him away. Alex had tended his wounds and... And now he was lying there. Alex hadn't done anything wrong compared to all the others. If something, Gauron should have been grateful for Alex.
Gauron cocked his head and stared at Kashim. “Are you crying? For him?” Gauron sounded disgusted.
“Fuck you”, Kashim spat and turned his head to wipe one of his eyes.
Gauron's head jerked back. “Well look who grew balls the minute I was gone.” He took some papers from the table without looking at them. “What are these?”
Kashim glanced at the plane tickets and his new passport. He didn't answer. That's why. That's the reason Alex was dead.
Gauron flipped the passport open. “I don't know who the fuck... Sagara Sousuke is,” he pronounced the name with care. “Or why he would go to Japan and frankly I don't give a fuck, but what I do give a fuck about is that there's your picture here.” He turned the passport to Kashim. Alex had made fun of his face in the picture. He had said Kashim looked constipated.
Kashim turned his eyes to Gauron. “I don't know what those are”, he said coldly.
Gauron stood up with such a speed, the chair he had been sitting on flew several meters backwards. “BULLSHIT!” Instantly he was standing right in front of Kashim, glaring down at him. Kashim stared back calmly. For some reason he didn't fear Gauron. Not after all he had been through lately. There was a deep silence in the whole apartment. Gauron's eyes narrowed and he tilted his head again. “Did he fuck you?”
Kashim had a severe urge to say yes, just to piss Gauron off. But the truth was, that Alex had already been killed and in a fit of rage Kashim could be too. “No.”
“Did you want him to?”
Kashim cursed himself when he felt his cheeks get hotter. Gauron wouldn't miss a signal like that. “I had a dream about it, but not really”, Kashim admitted with a shrug.
It seemed to take Gauron by surprise. “You had a sex dream? About him?!” The same disgusted tone was there again.
“Would it have been better if it was about Kaminski?” Kashim asked calmly and knew that this at least would change the subject.
Gauron relaxed a little. He was about to say something, but glanced at the new men instead. “Wait at the cars”, he said and the men left. Gauron placed his hand on Kashim's shoulder and led him to the bedroom. Kashim didn't object, since anywhere was better than the kitchen with Alex. “I heard you've had a little rough time.”
“If Vostrikov hadn't taken my gun, everything would have been okay”, Kashim said and decided to put at least some of the blame and Gauron's anger on Vostrikov. The rest Gauron could kill anyway, but Vostrikov was most likely to get out with just blaming the others. “He said I was unstable.”
“You? Nooo!” Gauron gasped, but the tone was mocking. He sat on the bed. “But he did make a shitty call, I'll talk with him about it.”
“What about the others?” Were they already dead or had Gauron wanted Kashim to witness the killing.
“We'll talk about it later. I will make them pay”, Gauron promised with a sigh and started to open his pants. “Now how about that welcome back gift?”
Kashim stared at the man for a second, before turning around. “I don't do that anymore”, he said and walked to the living room to get his jacket.
It took awhile for Gauron to follow him. “What?” It sounded like Gauron had never heard those words before and didn't quite know what they meant.
“What?” Kashim asked and was proud of his fake confusion.
“You don't do that anymore?”
“Yes”, Kashim confirmed. “I don't like it.”
Gauron was clearly out of words. It was actually quite a funny sight. Alex would've loved it. “Let me guess,” he said finally. “Geary told you to say that?”
Now Kashim was genuinely confused. “Who's Geary?”
“That fucking dead limp dick in the kitchen!”
Kashim frowned. “He didn't tell me to say anything. I just don't do it anymore.”
Gauron's hand grasped Kashim's throat in a tight squeeze. “I don't remember giving you options.”
Kashim didn't lift his hands to his throat or try to pry the fingers off and sure enough Gauron's grip loosened. He pushed Kashim away and frowned. “What the fuck's wrong with you?”
“I'm fucking done with this”, Kashim said, holding his sore throat and walked past Gauron. “Leave me be or kill me too, I don't give a fuck either way.”
**
The whole convoy was outside, the trucks with the arm slaves and everything. It seemed Gauron had hired at least ten new men too, so they would probably go do something big. Kashim walked past his usual truck and climbed in when he saw a truck with only some new guys in it. Most of them looked like Russians.
Gauron didn't come to the same truck. The engines started to roar and the trucks took off swaying and rumbling. All Kashim could think for several hours was Alex and how he had yelled at the man the last time they had seen each other.
“Are you the other AS pilot?”
Kashim lifted his eyes to a blond haired soldier maybe only few years older than him. He nodded to the man sitting on the opposite side of the truck. The blonde reached his gloved hand across the truck to Kashim. “Good to meet you. Kurz Weber.”
Kashim took the hand and shook it. “Kashim”, he mumbled.
“I'm a sharpshooter”, the man went on, now with a wide smile. “I have a whole load of kick-ass rifles with me”, he said and patted a large case under the bench. When Kashim didn't reply, the man continued to talk. “I'm not a Russian or anything, you probably notice from the accent, but hell Gauron pays well for an easy job, so...” No response. “I'm actually from Germany.” Nothing from Kashim. “You know where that is?”
Kashim shook his head a little.
It seemed to be all the man needed for a whole lecture about geography, Europe, Germany and how the man had ended up here. Few other guys joined his blabber so Kashim just toned out.
“So, Kashim. Tell us about Gauron.”
Kashim's head snapped up. All the others were staring at him.
“I mean, we all know he's a bad-ass and not to be fucked with, but anything else?” Weber asked, still smiling for some reason.
“He'll probably shoot half of you at the end of the mission, so he doesn't have to pay you”, Kashim said quietly and was grateful for the silence.
The trucks stopped few hours before sundown. Kashim got out with the rest of the men and started to unload the tents and supplies. He didn't get much done before Gauron walked to him.
“Kashim.”
Kashim put the box he had been carrying to the ground and turned to the man. Gauron walked next to him and put his arm on his shoulders. “We're going to get us some Mujahids for the Ruskies, clean up few of the caves for a good amount of cash. Now, this is a big operation and I need every man I have, okay? I can't kill any of them right now and neither can you, you got that?”
So the assholes that had jumped Kashim and almost killed him wouldn't be harmed. Yet. Kashim didn't answer.
Gauron's hand grabbed his shoulder. “No killing until the job's done, okay?”
“Roger”, Kashim said, even though he imagined gunning Kaminski and the others down with the smallest excuse.
“Good.” Gauron patted his shoulder. “Do you want to set up my tent?”
Kashim glanced at the man. “I can set it up, but I'm not sleeping in it. The new guys said they have room in their tent.” He gestured towards the men from his truck. Weber was setting up a fire and the others were unpacking food and the large tent they would sleep in.
“Oh. Well isn't that nice”, Gauron said with a smile. “You're making friends finally. That's good. But come sleep in my tent anyway”, the man said, patted Kashim's back again and left towards the AS trucks.
Kashim picked up the crate he had been carrying and walked to Weber. The man opened the crate, took food cans from it and started to set up the cooking gear.
“What was that about?” Weber asked, only quickly glancing at Kashim.
Kashim sat down and kept staring at the flames, feeding few branches to the fire. He didn't feel like talking about his stuff with Weber. They weren't friends or anything, no matter what Gauron said.
“Not much of a talker, huh?” Weber went on, grinning. Kashim glanced at the man, but remained silent. “So, are the things I heard about Gauron and you true?”
For a while Kashim had hoped he wouldn't have to go through this again with the new guys. He had hoped that maybe all that would be over now and he could be just a soldier like everyone else. Gauron would get bored with him and go on with his life and Kashim could do the same.
“Depends on what you've heard, I guess”, Kashim said tiredly. Maybe Weber didn't have the balls to start repeating all the things he had heard about Gauron fucking him in the public.
“You know, that you're his son.”
A piece of wood cracked in the fire and sent sparkles to the air. Kashim stared at the flames and tried to assess if he had heard the man right. Son? What. The. Fuck?
“Where did you hear that?” From the millions of questions it was the first to come out.
“Just something I picked up along the way. Is it true?”
Kashim was about to say no, because that was the truth, but he was hit with some doubt. He didn't actually know who his parents were. Had been. He had been told they were dead. Died in a plane crash or something and that's how he had ended up in Afghanistan in the first place. Scavenging the streets of Kabul, until Gauron had caught him stealing their food and brought him in.
“No”, Kashim said, but couldn't hide the horrible doubt in his mind. “My parents are dead.”
“Oh. Sorry”, Weber said with a frown. “Well, you know rumours. I just thought, you know, you being taken into the group as a kid and trained to be the other pilot and Gauron pretty much never leaving your side...” Weber shrugged and turned his eyes back to the food. “It all seemed to fit to me.” Weber stirred the food and moved it further away from the flames. “Do you remember your parents?”
“No”, Kashim answered. He didn't remember a lot before Gauron. Just that he had been hungry all the time and the bombings had scared him.
When the tents were up and the guard duties settled, the men gathered for supper. There was clearly two groups forming; the new guys and the old ones. Kashim stayed with the new ones, Gauron was mostly with the old.
As the night went on the talking got dirtier and the stories longer. Kashim stood up at one point, just wanting to be alone for a second. He walked past the trucks to the edge of the dirt road and then just stared into the wasteland. Gauron had came back. Everything was back to normal. More or less. The thought was dulling.
As the sun went down the desert got cold quickly. Not feeling like joining the others at the camp, Kashim climbed into the cockpit of one of the trucks. It was slightly warmer there and he could be alone. Maybe Gauron would even forget his order about the sleeping arrangements and just left him be. Kashim lifted his legs to the edge of the bench and tucked his hands in his armpits to keep them warmer. He sat there for hours, just staring at the night outside the wind-shield. Occasionally a burst of laughter or a bang of a truck door pulled him from his thoughts, but other than that he was not disturbed. Not until several hours after he had drifted into sleep.
The truck door opened and startled Kashim awake. Gauron climbed in and sat behind the wheel, turning towards Kashim.
“Why are you sleeping here? The others giving you a hard time again?”
“No...” Kashim mumbled and felt a shiver pass through him. The truck had gotten cold during the night and the tips of Kashim's fingers were getting numb. He rubbed his sleepy eyes. “Just felt like being alone.”
Gauron reached his hand behind the benches and pulled out a blanket. He tossed it to Kashim and watched him wrap it around himself. “You got food?”
“Yeah.”
There was a long silence. Kashim stared out of the windscreen and Gauron stared at him. “Come here for a second”, Gauron said and lifted his arm a little to invite Kashim closer. They shared a look and Gauron rolled his eyes. “For fuck's sake, I missed you, just come here for a second. I've barely been able to talk to you since I came back.”
For some reason Weber's words kept haunting Kashim. He stared at Gauron with a whole new way, searching for any similarities in the two of them. He could find none. Gauron was large in every way, Kashim was not. Kashim had only looked at himself from a mirror few times in his life, but he knew Gauron had a completely different nose than him. Their eyes were different too, even the shade of their skin.
“What?” Gauron snapped, getting tired of being stared at.
“Weber told me there's a rumour going on that you're my father”, Kashim said bluntly.
Gauron only frowned. “Who the fuck's Weber?”
“The blond sharpshooter. German.”
“Oh. Right. The kraut.” Gauron fell silent.
Kashim waited, but Gauron didn't say anything more. “Well?”
“What?” Gauron asked and smiled then. “Am I?” He lifted his arm to rest on top of the steering-wheel. “What difference does it make to you? You don't know fuck about parents or family. They are just words for you.”
Kashim clenched his teeth. Why couldn't he just give him a straight answer. It would have been a lot easier. Gauron's hand reached to ruffle Kashim's hair, but the boy pulled his head back avoiding the touch.
“Parents provide their children food and safety. Family keeps together and defends one another. Now tell me, what are the differences between a team and a family?”
Kashim was silent. He didn't know anything about families, so he didn't know if there were any differences. He had seen a lot of kids and some the men he had met during his life had kids, but... It didn't really mean anything. They were just the same as everyone else. Although the kids with parents usually had a place to sleep and food tot eat. Unlike Kashim during his early years.
“Does it bother you if people think we're related? It will keep you safer from now on.”
“I don't want to be like you”, Kashim said truthfully and turned his eyes to meet Gauron's. That was one of the few things he knew about parents and kids. They usually resembled one another.
The man just scoffed. “Now you're just trying to hurt my feelings. What else could you possibly want.”
“So it's just a rumour then?” Kashim decided to make sure. He was pretty sure he hadn't gotten a real answers yet.
“Just tell them to come and ask me, if anyone's interested. That you don't give a fuck either way. That's the truth in the end.”
Kashim turned his head back to face the windscreen.
“You don't need complicated shit like that to stress about, believe me. You're a simple person and that's absolutely nothing to be ashamed about.” Gauron moved closer and lifted his hand to place it to the back of Kashim's neck. The thumb caressed the tender skin.“It makes you my best soldier, Kashim, no matter what those jealous assholes say. And related or not I have never cared for anyone like I care for you. And that will never change, you can count on it. No matter what happens, the two of us will always remain together.”
Kashim knew Gauron was - for some reason - trying to make him feel better, but the words he spoke just sounded like a threat.
“What happened with Kaminski?” Gauron asked suddenly.
“They haven't told you?” Kashim doubted that. He was sure Kaminski and the others had told Gauron some bullshit the second he returned.
“I've heard their side of it. And Vostrikov's. I haven't heard yours, so let's have it. It's probably closest to the truth anyway.” Gauron pulled his hand away and went back on resting his arm on the steering wheel, his torso turned towards Kashim.
Kashim shrugged, like the whole ordeal wasn't anything to talk about. “They came asking Vostrikov one night, drunk, and started to talk about beating me. I had my gun then, so I got them to leave by threatening to shoot Kaminski's balls off.” It got a laughter out of Gauron, of course. “But after that Vostrikov took my gun away and they came back. They gassed the house and beat me. They were talking about killing me and tried to...” Kashim stopped talking, when he remembered the tracking chip. Alex had taken it out and it was still in Kashim's pocket.
“They tried to what?” Gauron's face was an unreadable and unnerving mask.
Did Gauron know the chip was gone? He knew about Alex taking care of Kashim. And that Alex had planned their escape. Now, if--
“Kashim!” Gauron barked and interrupted Kashim's thoughts. “Keep talking.”
They both knew Kashim wasn't a quick thinker. He needed enough time to reach conclusions and make decisions about lying and how he should lie and about what exact things. The only thing Gauron had to do to keep Kashim from lying, was to keep him talking.
“Quick, quick!” Gauron snapped and clapped his hands loudly.
“They tried to carve the chip from my back,” Kashim said even though he knew it was the wrong thing to do. He just didn't have enough time to come up with anything else. He knew it was the best if Gauron didn't know about the chip being gone. It would give Kashim advantage, when he did decide to escape.
“Did they get it?”
“No.”
“And Geary stitched you back up.”
Kashim was about to say that Alex hadn't taken the chip out either. He already had his mouth open and now his brains were trying to catch up with him. “Yes”, he managed finally.
Gauron was silent for awhile. “Let's see it then.” When Kashim remained still, with a questioning look on his face, Gauron rolled his eyes. “Your back. Let's see how much they fucked you up.”
Kashim turned sideways on the bench and took off his jacket and then the wife-beater. Gauron reached towards the ceiling and flipped on a light before moving closer. “Motherfuckers...” the man mumbled and placed his hand between Kashim's shoulder blades. The scars were still fresh and the edges of the wounds had barely healed close. But it wasn't like Gauron had never inflicted any scars himself. Hell, Kashim had probably tens of them. “I'm going to rip their heads off and piss into their windpipes.” The heavy hand caressed over the scars. “Does it hurt still?”
Kashim shook his head. He couldn't deny it didn't feel good to have someone acknowledge the wrongness he had endured. It felt good to have someone say he had the right to feel betrayed.
“We're going to make them pay, make no mistake about it. You will get to kill them.”
Kashim was about to say he didn't want that. He wanted to say he was above things like that. That he wasn't bitter or angry. He found himself staring into the wasteland and then turning towards Gauron. They stared at each other for a short while. “I just want to kill Kaminski”, Kashim said quietly, admitting to himself he wanted revenge. “Now.”
Gauron smiled lazily. “I need everyone right now.”
Kashim gritted his teeth. He remembered the feeling of being suffocated by the gas, even after sticking his head into the water basin and almost forcing him to drown himself. The feeling of the knife on his back, cutting his flesh. “I want to shoot him now”, Kashim stated in determined and cold voice.
Gauron placed his palm against Kashim's cheek and leaned in to kiss him. Kashim let him, even opened his mouth slightly to let Gauron's tongue into his mouth. The kiss deepened and Gauron's hand sneaked around Kashim's head to rest on the back of his neck. Their tongues pushed against each other, Kashim could taste the familiar mixture of tobacco and vodka. After awhile Gauron pulled an inch back, keeping his face in front of Kashim's. “I fucking love it when you lose your shit and start your killing rampages, but I need two sharpshooters right now.”
Kashim stared at the man coldly and noted Gauron's pistol on his belt. Hesitating only momentarily Kashim leaned back in to kiss Gauron. He reached towards Gauron's pistol and bit the man's lower lip at the same time his fingers touched the gun. Gauron only chuckled and sighed as Kashim deepened the kiss. The gun was already halfway out of the holster.
“Turn off the light”, Kashim pleaded in a whisper.
Gauron turned his eyes and reached towards the light switch. In a second Kashim had yanked the gun to himself and opened his side of the door. Gauron's hand tried to grasp him, but the man was too slow, Kashim was out of the truck and running towards the camp. Only thing he could think of was Kaminski laughing at him, kicking him, mocking him, making him feel like an idiot.
“Kashim! KASHIM!”
Kashim ignored Gauron's shouts and kept running. There was a shuffle around the camp fire as the men tried to make out what was happening in the dark. Kashim ran straight towards Kaminski, jumping over few crates on the ground.
He saw the man getting pale as he saw the gun in Kashim's hand. Kaminski had the time to stand up and then Kashim was there, pointing the pistol at his skull.
“The fuck are you doing?” the man shouted, holding up his hands. His voice was shaking badly.
“Kashim! Don't do it!” Gauron bellowed behind him, but not bothering to run.
“Gauron! Jesus!” There was panic in Kaminski's voice as he turned his watering eyes towards Gauron. Kashim stared at the man, swearing to himself that no one, fucking no one, would ever attack him like that again.
“Kashim!” Gauron shouted again. “Don't--!”
Kashim pulled the trigger. The bullet hit Kaminski's forehead and the sand behind him was plastered with blood and brain pieces. The man toppled down as the echo of the shot bounced around the rocky terrain around them. There was no other sound. The others were sitting as still as possible. Kashim lowered his gun and felt a rush of relief.
Gauron stepped to him and backhanded Kashim across his face. Kashim didn't even flinch even though the blood started to flow from his nose and dripped to his bare chest. “Fucking lunatic”, Gauron huffed and picked up his gun, shoving it back to the holster. He grabbed Kashim by his shoulder and pushed him to walk towards his tent. “Get rid of the body!” he shouted at the remaining men.
It was chilly and dark in Gauron's tent since he had banned the use of stoves for their weight. When the winter came they would be stuck in towns and villages for months. Kashim wrapped his arms around himself and sat down on top of the sleeping mats and bags.
“You fucking asshole!” Gauron shouted and kicked one of the backpacks over. “Where the fuck am I supposed to get another sharpshooter now, huh?!” he shouted, bending closer to Kashim's face. “Answer me?!”
Kashim opened his mouth, knowing fully well there were no correct answers at the moment. “We can recruit another one”, Kashim said quietly. It didn't matter to him. The only thing that mattered was that Kaminski was dead and now none of the others would ever have the guts to mock him.
“The fuck we can!” Gauron shouted. “I told you, you could kill him later! When the fucking job was done!”
“He was a shitty sharpshooter anyway, what do you--”
Gauron attacked him with amazing speed, straddling over him and his hands seizing Kashim by the throat. He leaned closer and had a somewhat crazed look on his face. “I fucking told you 'no'”, he said calmly, his voice dripping with venom. “I should just snap your little disobeying neck right now and be done with you.”
Kashim waited calmly if the man would carry out his threat, but nothing happened.
Slowly Gauron unclasped his hands and sighed, straightening himself up but not getting off Kashim. “I have neglected you for too long, I know. It's my fault.” Gauron placed his hand against Kashim's cheek and lifted the corner of his mouth unhappily. “I should've been here, like I should've been with you in Singapore. Shit, Kashim, I'm sorry. You've had to go through so much shit because of me.”
Kashim lifted an eyebrow. Gauron was so unbelievably unpredictable it could've easily been terrifying. It probably was to the most of the team. Kashim had already learned Gauron's boundaries, at least when it came to Kashim. Gauron could hit him, he could make him suffer, but he wouldn't kill him. Gauron could say he was sorry and that everything would be okay and not meaning a word he said. He could be yelling at one moment and...
Gauron leaned down and started to lick the blood off from Kashim's chest. The hot tongue started between Kashim's pecs, working it's way up towards the collarbones. Kashim stared at the dark canopy ceiling of the tent and remained perfectly still. He couldn't help but jump a little as Gauron's tongue found it's way to one of his nipples. The man chuckled against his skin, smoothing the side of Kashim's torso with his hand. “Don't worry. I'm here now and we'll go through once again why you are going to do everything exactly like I tell you to.”
Gauron moved up to face Kashim and started to lick the blood from the boy's nose.
“Stop it”, Kashim mumbled and turned his head away. He lifted his hand to wipe the remaining blood away, but Gauron grasped his wrist and hit it against the ground.
“Are you giving me orders, you little pissant? You? A fucking homicidal wackjob?”
“I'm sorry”, Kashim sighed, his head still turned to aside.
Gauron took a hold of his face and turned Kashim to face him. “Do it properly, like you mean it.”
Kashim stared at the man. He had never gotten the difference, but it was something to do with tones of voice and eye contact. “I'm sorry”, he said again, sounding exactly the same to himself.
Gauron seemed pleased. “Good. Now get up and take off your pants. I want to watch you.” The man moved away to give Kashim some space. They both sat up and Gauron started to go through one of the backpacks. He pulled out a bottle of vodka and turned his eyes to Kashim. “Well go on. Get up.”
Kashim hesitated. “I'm not going to have sex with you”, he reminded. “I told you, I don't do it anymore.”
“I asked you to take off your fucking pants. Are you going to do it or are we going to have a fight about it? Those are your choices”, Gauron informed calmly and opened his bottle. “Choose.”
For a moment Kashim wondered if Gauron would beat him up just after he had apologised about the others doing that. There was no doubt about it. Gauron and logic didn't fit in to the same frame if there was already sex there.
“We're going to start from the basics, since you seem to have forgotten them. I tell you what to do and you do it, without any bullshit. You don't start to negotiate, you don't start killing people, you don't run away and you don't talk back.” Gauron sipped the vodka straight from the bottle. “Take off your pants or I'll drag you out and whip you in front of everyone.”
Kashim eyes grew wider and he tensed up. Gauron had whipped him only once and only with three strikes, but at the time it had been more than enough to quell his rebellious thoughts for almost three years. He stood up.
Gauron smiled and took a more relaxed posture, leaning his back against the backpacks. “Come closer.” He patted the ground just next to him. “I want you right in front of me.”
Kashim stepped forward and Gauron yanked him closer by his belt. Kashim ended up standing in front of Gauron, his feet on both sides of the man and his crotch just inches away from Gauron's face.
“That's better”, Gauron mused and inhaled deeply. He lifted his hand to cup Kashim's clothed genitals and massaged them lightly. “You're doing very good. Now, open your pants.” Kashim dropped his hands to his belt, but Gauron placed his own hands on top of his. “Very slowly. Like you were disarming a mine.”
The metaphor made Kashim stop. It was one of the few cases when he understood exactly what Gauron wanted. He still didn't understand exactly why Gauron would want him to act like that, but at least he knew what to do. He placed his hands on his belt buckle and started to loosen the end of the belt. With a gentle flick of his finger he undid the prong and worked the belt through the frame. Gauron's hand had moved to massage his left thigh.
Kashim let the belt droop open as he moved his fingers to unbutton his pants. He pulled his zipper down one tooth at a time. His palms were sweating and Kashim had to remind himself that he wasn't actually undoing a mine here. His pants were open and hanging loosely around his hips. Gauron moved his hand inside his pants to feel his genitals again, now through the thin fabric of his briefs.
“You have no idea how fucking sexy you are”, Gauron whispered. Kashim could only agree since he had no idea of anything concerning Gauron and sex and that was just fine by him. “Turn around.”
Kashim obeyed without saying a word and felt Gauron's hands on his buttocks. The man reached his fingertips inside Kashim's trousers and pulled them down, briefs and all. It was dim in the tent, but it didn't seem to bother Gauron. He pressed his hand against Kashim's skin, going through every inch of his ass with his hands, grabbing and feeling it. His thumb pressed against Kashim's tail bone and went downwards from there, ending up on his hole.
Kashim kept staring at the door of the tent, fearing that some idiotic rookie would walk in any moment. He didn't know what he had been expecting Gauron to do, but when he felt the soft kiss against his ass cheek, Kashim knew he hadn't expected that. Gauron's rough stubble was scratching against his skin and the thumb kept massaging the muscles on his opening.
“On your hands and knees”, Gauron muttered, his mouth hovering hotly over the wet skin. Kashim lowered himself down and bit his teeth together. He reminded himself that this would be far less painful and humiliating than being whipped and fucked in front of the others.
But Gauron didn't start to fuck him. There was a unnerving silence and then Gauron shifted behind Kashim. A quick and painful slap caused Kashim to startle and shout out. Gauron's hand grabbed his hair and yanked Kashim's head up. “You've been a bad boy, Kashim. A very bad boy. You don't kill people without permission. You do not decide who lives or dies, that's my job.” He yanked Kashim's hair and slapped his ass again. The hit was far from gentle and Kashim knew he would have a hard time sitting, if the man would go on. “Is this clear?”
“Y-yes, sir”, Kashim breathed out, trying his best to block what he could from the pain.
“Say it!” Gauron barked and hit him again.
“I don't.. decide.. who dies!” Kashim managed between the next several slaps. Gauron's wrist was loose and the hit came with the full power of his palm, covering the whole cheek. Kashim kept pressing his eyes and mouth close so he wouldn't cry out, but jesus did it hurt.
“Apologise to me.” Another hit that caused Kashim to bite the inside of his cheek.
“I'm sorry”, he begged, tasting the blood in his mouth. “Please stop.”
“Does it hurt?” Gauron's voice was softer now, the man leaning over Kashim's body.
“Yes.” Kashim took no shame about admitting it. Gauron knew how to hit hard and painfully.
“You have to promise me you will behave from now on”, Gauron said smiling, smoothing the raw skin of Kashim's ass with his hand. “Daddy's home and in this family we have rules to follow.”
** ** **
A/N: yeeeeah... I'm pretty sure Gauron's not his biological father, no matter how AU this turns out to be. But then again I have very little control over these faggots anymore, so who fucking knows.. Anyway, it's more likely that Gauron just likes the idea of someone being tied so closely to him. ...Sick fucker. ... Aw what the hell, Gauron's hot as hell. I promise he's not going to go anywhere ever again. *squeeeeezes Gauron-sama* *and probably gets his head shot off* OK, I'll shut up now.