Leaving
It might finally be starting to sink in a little, that I'm leaving for good this time.
I went down to the sushi place that I used to live next door to on Tuesday, for one last dinner there. I've actually talked with some of the guys who work behind the counter there, so it was a little sad to explain that I'm leaving at the end of the month. There's been a really cute, talkative guy there the past couple times, too, and I'm a little sorry I won't see him anymore. He wants to open a restaurant in Italy, which is pretty cool. I got a little teary-eyed a couple times while I was eating, realizing that I won't come back again. I also splurged and had two plates of the good tuna, since it will be super-expensive and/or impossible to find back in America.
Then, last night was my last taiko practice with the group I've been with for two years. I had two last performances with them this past weekend, which was nice. One was a tiny summer festival at a shrine in Kasai on Saturday night, that fincalian and leathansparrow came to see. That was fun, even though it was very hot and muggy, and I got bug bites. Then there was an all-day thing hosted by another taiko group over in Yashiro. I went to this last year without realizing that it was an all-day thing, but this year I was prepared and brought my cross-stitch to fill some of the waiting time. I also got to watch some of the other groups perform. The Kakogawa taiko group is all young people, and they're really good and really energetic. So all in all it was a good day. Last night was a good practice, though I didn't actually say good-bye at the end because a couple of the guys who usually lead the group and who have done a lot to teach me weren't there, and it felt wrong to say good-bye when they wouldn't hear it. So, I'll go back next Wednesday after the summer festival here, just at the end of practice to say good-bye. It was weird to have them be talking about a performance coming up on the 30th and to think that I couldn't go, not because I have travel plans inside Japan, but because I'll be flying back to the US for good.
It also feels a little weird that, thus far, I've not cried at all about any of this, but that saying good-bye to sushi and taiko has been much more difficult than saying good-bye to any of my schools. :\ I guess that as much as school has been a huge part of my life here, it has never been my favorite part, so I am less sad to say good-bye to it? I don't know. That seems sad in itself, I guess, but teaching is not what I want to do with my life, so it's not as though I'm saying good-bye to a career. And much as it was nice to see a lot of different schools on a regular basis, moving around so much made it harder to connect with either the students or the other teachers, so I'm not as close with people as I might have been if I'd had only one school. Also, there were a number of aspects of school that I disliked as well, moreso than other aspects of living here.
I'm getting the impression that leaving and my reaction to it are going to hit more after I'm back in the US? I'm not sure. I'll have to see how the next couple of weeks go. Part of it might be that I am looking forward to going back, but that doesn't mean that I'm not or not going to be sad to be leaving. It's just that it's a little bit hard to feel it when so far, my daily life here hasn't changed much. It might sink in more next week, too, after school is out and the change is more obvious.
Now, completely unrelated, does anyone have suggestions for a journal name, title and sub-title for this playing card comm I want to start?
~A
I went down to the sushi place that I used to live next door to on Tuesday, for one last dinner there. I've actually talked with some of the guys who work behind the counter there, so it was a little sad to explain that I'm leaving at the end of the month. There's been a really cute, talkative guy there the past couple times, too, and I'm a little sorry I won't see him anymore. He wants to open a restaurant in Italy, which is pretty cool. I got a little teary-eyed a couple times while I was eating, realizing that I won't come back again. I also splurged and had two plates of the good tuna, since it will be super-expensive and/or impossible to find back in America.
Then, last night was my last taiko practice with the group I've been with for two years. I had two last performances with them this past weekend, which was nice. One was a tiny summer festival at a shrine in Kasai on Saturday night, that fincalian and leathansparrow came to see. That was fun, even though it was very hot and muggy, and I got bug bites. Then there was an all-day thing hosted by another taiko group over in Yashiro. I went to this last year without realizing that it was an all-day thing, but this year I was prepared and brought my cross-stitch to fill some of the waiting time. I also got to watch some of the other groups perform. The Kakogawa taiko group is all young people, and they're really good and really energetic. So all in all it was a good day. Last night was a good practice, though I didn't actually say good-bye at the end because a couple of the guys who usually lead the group and who have done a lot to teach me weren't there, and it felt wrong to say good-bye when they wouldn't hear it. So, I'll go back next Wednesday after the summer festival here, just at the end of practice to say good-bye. It was weird to have them be talking about a performance coming up on the 30th and to think that I couldn't go, not because I have travel plans inside Japan, but because I'll be flying back to the US for good.
It also feels a little weird that, thus far, I've not cried at all about any of this, but that saying good-bye to sushi and taiko has been much more difficult than saying good-bye to any of my schools. :\ I guess that as much as school has been a huge part of my life here, it has never been my favorite part, so I am less sad to say good-bye to it? I don't know. That seems sad in itself, I guess, but teaching is not what I want to do with my life, so it's not as though I'm saying good-bye to a career. And much as it was nice to see a lot of different schools on a regular basis, moving around so much made it harder to connect with either the students or the other teachers, so I'm not as close with people as I might have been if I'd had only one school. Also, there were a number of aspects of school that I disliked as well, moreso than other aspects of living here.
I'm getting the impression that leaving and my reaction to it are going to hit more after I'm back in the US? I'm not sure. I'll have to see how the next couple of weeks go. Part of it might be that I am looking forward to going back, but that doesn't mean that I'm not or not going to be sad to be leaving. It's just that it's a little bit hard to feel it when so far, my daily life here hasn't changed much. It might sink in more next week, too, after school is out and the change is more obvious.
Now, completely unrelated, does anyone have suggestions for a journal name, title and sub-title for this playing card comm I want to start?
~A