Resolution Revolution
I have decided not to make a New Year's resolution this year. I can barely remember the resolutions I made last year except for one, though I'm sure they were the usual lose weight, get organized, get better, be something. The kind of resolutions everyone makes, and no one keeps. Maybe because they're all shoulds and ought tos. And shoulds don't inspire us. Ought tos don't get our hearts,and therefore our bodies moving. So I'm not going to make an ought to resolution. I'm not going to focus on the things I ought to do that I probably won't. Instead I'm going to focus on what I want to do. I'm going to look for things that make my heart sing. I'm going to look for things that make me happy.
The one resolution I made last year that I did keep was to get out more. To do one live event or excursion every month. And I accomplished it. I didn't quite finish scrapbooking all the experiences, but I had them. And if they didn't change my life, at least they made it a little wider.
It's so easy to get stuck in routine. To come home from work and bury myself in a book, in a movie, in the computer, in my own head. It's so easy to pull in and forget the world exists, to push it away even, till I look up and realize I'm alone. I don't want to be alone, but I don't always want company either. One of the many fine lines in my contrary nature. The one thing resolution pushed me out there, at least a little. It gave me a reason to look beyond my books, to look outside my routine for more experiences, new avenues, new expressions. I've done some things in the last year that I've never done before. I cut down my own Christmas tree. I crashed a costume party. I did things I haven't done in a long time. I went to a musical. I went ice skating. I rode a ferry, and I slept in a tent.
So I'm going to do it again this year. And I'm going to up the ante. One thing is now two things. I will do two live events or excursions each month for the year of 2008. I'm moving to Phoenix, so I'll have the excuse of a whole new city to explore, but I think I could do it, even if I stayed in Vancouver. I've always wanted more from my life than just getting by, and I don't know if I'll ever get to the freedom I want, to that in-the-moment feeling of being alive and myself and certain. But this will be a good step. This will get me out of the zone I call comfort but that I think I'm going to rename stagnant. After all who would want to hang out in the stagnant zone?
Oops. I think I just made a resolution.
The one resolution I made last year that I did keep was to get out more. To do one live event or excursion every month. And I accomplished it. I didn't quite finish scrapbooking all the experiences, but I had them. And if they didn't change my life, at least they made it a little wider.
It's so easy to get stuck in routine. To come home from work and bury myself in a book, in a movie, in the computer, in my own head. It's so easy to pull in and forget the world exists, to push it away even, till I look up and realize I'm alone. I don't want to be alone, but I don't always want company either. One of the many fine lines in my contrary nature. The one thing resolution pushed me out there, at least a little. It gave me a reason to look beyond my books, to look outside my routine for more experiences, new avenues, new expressions. I've done some things in the last year that I've never done before. I cut down my own Christmas tree. I crashed a costume party. I did things I haven't done in a long time. I went to a musical. I went ice skating. I rode a ferry, and I slept in a tent.
So I'm going to do it again this year. And I'm going to up the ante. One thing is now two things. I will do two live events or excursions each month for the year of 2008. I'm moving to Phoenix, so I'll have the excuse of a whole new city to explore, but I think I could do it, even if I stayed in Vancouver. I've always wanted more from my life than just getting by, and I don't know if I'll ever get to the freedom I want, to that in-the-moment feeling of being alive and myself and certain. But this will be a good step. This will get me out of the zone I call comfort but that I think I'm going to rename stagnant. After all who would want to hang out in the stagnant zone?
Oops. I think I just made a resolution.