ngidinga utschwala ukudansa
some other little things i forgot to mention about the rural homestay:
-my family called me zaneli, so i now have a zulu name. this ended up kind of bugging me. zaneli apparently means "enough" and i feel like this has some pretty negative connotations. and whenever i introduced myself they wanted me to introduce myself as zaneli sishi (their surname). this was just weird for me. apparently, there is a lot in a name. more than you realize.
-they always wanted me to dance. i don't dance, especially traditional zulu dancing. so, every time i would be like "angidansi" which means "i don't dance." then they would laugh. i was never brave enough to say "ngidinga utschwala ukudansa" which means "i need beer to dance." that would have caused either a lot of laughter or strange looks.
so, after we peaced out on monday we went straight to prison. here we met with female prisoners and had a dialogue with them in small groups about what it's like to be a mother in prison. the group we did this program through is called phoenix zululand and its an organization run by quakers that believe in restorative justice over prison. so, instead of women (or men, for that matter) going to prison for petty crimes like theft they would be able to work for the state during the day and return to their families at night. also, while this was not talked about, restorative justice also involves a dialogue between victim and offender in which the offender asks for forgiveness from the victim.
what i found most interesting about this experience was that in the south african prison system women can have their babies in jail with them until the baby is two years old. then the baby is removed from the mother and the prison and taken either to the prisoner's family or the babies father (not sure what happens if neither of those are available/willing to take the baby in). does this happen in the american prison system? i don't think it does, but i could be wrong. i'm really not sure how i feel about this. yes, it's good for the mother to have and maintain a bond with their child, especially when that child is a baby. but, at the same time, i don't think there is much conversation about what happens to the child when they are taken away from their mother. there is plenty of talk about how it is painful for the mom, but what about the baby? i feel like that is a critical time in a child's life and while he/she may not remember the incident that does not make it any the less painful and difficult.
later on monday we had a walk through the forest. for some this was exciting, but my rural family had already taken me through plenty of forest hikes so i wasn't as excited. though the aerial boardwalk was cool and we were able to see all five levels of the forest. and a bunch of people climbed this natal fig tree (it used to be a tree and then some figs dropped and got their own roots that actually ended up strangling the original tree to death).
tuesday we journeyed to the backpackers we would stay at for the next two days. it was a nice and relaxing rest of the day.
wednesday we woke up at 5am and headed for the game drive (read: safari for all you foreigners). i managed to stay on with an actual tour the entire four hours (some people had to ride in one of the sit vans for two hours...which essentially means seeing nothing).
list of animals seen:
-elephants
-giraffes
-a mamma lion and her cub (yeah, we were lucky enough to see a lion)
-buffalo
-white rhinos
-a bunch of deer-like animals
-antelope of the south african variety
-birds
-other stuff...
a funny story about the elephants is that my van within the first two hours was charged by a horny, cranky elephant. it was exciting to see the least. disgusting because horny elephants dribble urine down their legs in preparation for sex. it smelled a little rank. but still makes for an awesome story.
then a smaller group of us opted to go on a hippo tour. it was really cool. i saw tons of hippos. i've also decided that hippo ears remind me of shrek's ears. they're cute.
i got back and found that the clothes that i had washed by the people who worked at the backpackers had turned purple! in a rush (since they were pressuring me to add more clothes) i had added a tie dye skirt to the mix. it was purple and turned everything purple. it pissed me off. i was irate. i tried to explain how my clothes weren't purple when they went into the laundry and they didn't believe me. they're like "can that happen?" umm yes. so basically 4-5 shirts of mine were now purple when they used to be light blue or white. and then the guy has the audacity to say to me "well, it's not like they're damaged." really, asshole? the fact that they went in a different color and came out purple isn't damage? argh. to make matters worse, south africans don't believe in giving you your money back apparently and i had to pay for my ruined clothes. but they wanted to keep them anyway for the laundry ladies to look at it. i decided by the next morning that i would just ask for my clothes back because i didn't want to deal with being angry anymore. so i went in there and was like can i have my clothes back. then they have the audacity to ask me if they can see the purple skirt. i get angry. "why? what does it matter? it's not going to fix any of my clothes. just give me my clothes back." then they did. finally. and i stormed off. the end. now i have to go shopping. i ended up throwing one shirt out because it just looked ridiculous.
thursday we finally headed back to durban and i once again had internet access. we also returned to our cato manor homestay families. i thought it would be somewhat awkward (and it was) but was not nearly as bad as i thought it would be. i brought them home a gift of some mangos and they seemed very pleasantly surprised by it. so i felt good about myself. though now i am nervous that they probably won't share even a bite of those mangos with me, but i guess i expect that by now.
-my family called me zaneli, so i now have a zulu name. this ended up kind of bugging me. zaneli apparently means "enough" and i feel like this has some pretty negative connotations. and whenever i introduced myself they wanted me to introduce myself as zaneli sishi (their surname). this was just weird for me. apparently, there is a lot in a name. more than you realize.
-they always wanted me to dance. i don't dance, especially traditional zulu dancing. so, every time i would be like "angidansi" which means "i don't dance." then they would laugh. i was never brave enough to say "ngidinga utschwala ukudansa" which means "i need beer to dance." that would have caused either a lot of laughter or strange looks.
so, after we peaced out on monday we went straight to prison. here we met with female prisoners and had a dialogue with them in small groups about what it's like to be a mother in prison. the group we did this program through is called phoenix zululand and its an organization run by quakers that believe in restorative justice over prison. so, instead of women (or men, for that matter) going to prison for petty crimes like theft they would be able to work for the state during the day and return to their families at night. also, while this was not talked about, restorative justice also involves a dialogue between victim and offender in which the offender asks for forgiveness from the victim.
what i found most interesting about this experience was that in the south african prison system women can have their babies in jail with them until the baby is two years old. then the baby is removed from the mother and the prison and taken either to the prisoner's family or the babies father (not sure what happens if neither of those are available/willing to take the baby in). does this happen in the american prison system? i don't think it does, but i could be wrong. i'm really not sure how i feel about this. yes, it's good for the mother to have and maintain a bond with their child, especially when that child is a baby. but, at the same time, i don't think there is much conversation about what happens to the child when they are taken away from their mother. there is plenty of talk about how it is painful for the mom, but what about the baby? i feel like that is a critical time in a child's life and while he/she may not remember the incident that does not make it any the less painful and difficult.
later on monday we had a walk through the forest. for some this was exciting, but my rural family had already taken me through plenty of forest hikes so i wasn't as excited. though the aerial boardwalk was cool and we were able to see all five levels of the forest. and a bunch of people climbed this natal fig tree (it used to be a tree and then some figs dropped and got their own roots that actually ended up strangling the original tree to death).
tuesday we journeyed to the backpackers we would stay at for the next two days. it was a nice and relaxing rest of the day.
wednesday we woke up at 5am and headed for the game drive (read: safari for all you foreigners). i managed to stay on with an actual tour the entire four hours (some people had to ride in one of the sit vans for two hours...which essentially means seeing nothing).
list of animals seen:
-elephants
-giraffes
-a mamma lion and her cub (yeah, we were lucky enough to see a lion)
-buffalo
-white rhinos
-a bunch of deer-like animals
-antelope of the south african variety
-birds
-other stuff...
a funny story about the elephants is that my van within the first two hours was charged by a horny, cranky elephant. it was exciting to see the least. disgusting because horny elephants dribble urine down their legs in preparation for sex. it smelled a little rank. but still makes for an awesome story.
then a smaller group of us opted to go on a hippo tour. it was really cool. i saw tons of hippos. i've also decided that hippo ears remind me of shrek's ears. they're cute.
i got back and found that the clothes that i had washed by the people who worked at the backpackers had turned purple! in a rush (since they were pressuring me to add more clothes) i had added a tie dye skirt to the mix. it was purple and turned everything purple. it pissed me off. i was irate. i tried to explain how my clothes weren't purple when they went into the laundry and they didn't believe me. they're like "can that happen?" umm yes. so basically 4-5 shirts of mine were now purple when they used to be light blue or white. and then the guy has the audacity to say to me "well, it's not like they're damaged." really, asshole? the fact that they went in a different color and came out purple isn't damage? argh. to make matters worse, south africans don't believe in giving you your money back apparently and i had to pay for my ruined clothes. but they wanted to keep them anyway for the laundry ladies to look at it. i decided by the next morning that i would just ask for my clothes back because i didn't want to deal with being angry anymore. so i went in there and was like can i have my clothes back. then they have the audacity to ask me if they can see the purple skirt. i get angry. "why? what does it matter? it's not going to fix any of my clothes. just give me my clothes back." then they did. finally. and i stormed off. the end. now i have to go shopping. i ended up throwing one shirt out because it just looked ridiculous.
thursday we finally headed back to durban and i once again had internet access. we also returned to our cato manor homestay families. i thought it would be somewhat awkward (and it was) but was not nearly as bad as i thought it would be. i brought them home a gift of some mangos and they seemed very pleasantly surprised by it. so i felt good about myself. though now i am nervous that they probably won't share even a bite of those mangos with me, but i guess i expect that by now.