Very non-linear ramblings.
Supposedly, I have a job. However, they never called when they said they were going to and I keep forgetting to call them because...because...because...I just don't care? I don't really know why I haven't called them. I think it's because I know what it's going to entail and because of my thorough lack of enthusiasm for that field coupled with the way my life seems to be stuck in a rut. But regardless of that I do need the money and I know I need to go in for training on the 18th and 19th, so I reckon I'll just wait until then.
L's been keeping herself entertained with learning how to touch-type in Russian. When I asked her how that would help her English, she told me that by knowing how to touch-type in Russian, she'd be able to instantly pick it up in English. When she's not doing that, she's been studying her English and helping me keep house and cook. If she's not doing any of that, she's playing Bust-a-Move for the SNES emulator. She was going to go to ESL classes, but her level was filled before she got a chance to enroll, so she's on a waiting list until a place opens up, most likely in January. By then, she's probably going to be too advanced for that class and will be put on yet another waiting list and so on.
I've been entertaining myself with intro electronics, the Korean alphabet and playing Paperboy/Tempest/Moon Patrol on MAME (arcade game emulator). I also found my cache of -ology textbooks which are earmarked for future reading. Thanks to Avantgo, I've returned to my old habit of being a news junkie. I now also drink entirely too much coffee instead of drinking entirely too much beer. When I'm not entertaining or wiring myself, I'm cleaning and/or washing things or sleeping, though I like to call it conserving energy.
Dusted off the bicycles yesterday. Due to improper maintenance/storage, the chains and gears have rusted over and need to be replaced. Yet another expense, though help is coming in the form of a nice tax rebate. If all goes well, I'll get them in fine form just in time for winter, where they'll have to wait until next year sometime to be ridden. At least this time, they'll be stored in a safe place.
I also came up with a movie idea while shredding crap I found in my closet. Now I just need to write it down. It'd be a short feature, but I'm sure I could expound off of it and make it a box-office-flop.
I thought I was in terrible shape, but I think it's a combination of this crap weather, having no real purpose and the overall aura in this house that's been draining my energy.
L and I need to get out of here. My only question is where to go? As much as I do miss it there, I'm kinda tired of Moscow and would like to try a different change of scenery. And while I thought I missed this place (the states), both L and I are finding it to be a land of extreme disappointment. To me, America has become a place where people only have time to work a job they dislike so they can stay one step ahead of the Joneses or the bill collectors. No one really seems happy unless they're medicated and even then, it's a simple whitewash of their miserable lives easily seen through. Corruption is hidden under multiple facades of forced smiles, clueless customer service and cold, calculated cordiality. It's even becoming more cost-effective to eat shit-burgers every night than it is to cook your own meals. It's becoming a place where junkmail outnumbers actual mail 20 to 1 and despite a massive job shortage, telemarketing gets outsourced to India.
I swear, the very next dot-head that phones me at 7:30 in the morning hawking viagra or dish network is gonna get an earful.
So, running doesn't seem to be doing any good, but staying and fighting doesn't appear to hold a bright future either. What the hell's happened? How did this happen and what can be done to reverse it? Is this really all there's left to look forward to? I'm not sure if all of this stems from being alone in a country going down the shitter, being alone in a world going down the shitter or simply a matter of getting old. I sincerely hope it's not just a matter of getting old. I mean, if this is it, I'm kinda glad I can't find my gun, though that wouldn't accomplish anything either.
I guess I'll go sleep on it some more, but I'm tired of being tired. I'm also tired of talking about stuff and thinking about it. It's time for action, but in a life of being conditioned to fear and incapability, it's kinda hard to make a decision.
L's been keeping herself entertained with learning how to touch-type in Russian. When I asked her how that would help her English, she told me that by knowing how to touch-type in Russian, she'd be able to instantly pick it up in English. When she's not doing that, she's been studying her English and helping me keep house and cook. If she's not doing any of that, she's playing Bust-a-Move for the SNES emulator. She was going to go to ESL classes, but her level was filled before she got a chance to enroll, so she's on a waiting list until a place opens up, most likely in January. By then, she's probably going to be too advanced for that class and will be put on yet another waiting list and so on.
I've been entertaining myself with intro electronics, the Korean alphabet and playing Paperboy/Tempest/Moon Patrol on MAME (arcade game emulator). I also found my cache of -ology textbooks which are earmarked for future reading. Thanks to Avantgo, I've returned to my old habit of being a news junkie. I now also drink entirely too much coffee instead of drinking entirely too much beer. When I'm not entertaining or wiring myself, I'm cleaning and/or washing things or sleeping, though I like to call it conserving energy.
Dusted off the bicycles yesterday. Due to improper maintenance/storage, the chains and gears have rusted over and need to be replaced. Yet another expense, though help is coming in the form of a nice tax rebate. If all goes well, I'll get them in fine form just in time for winter, where they'll have to wait until next year sometime to be ridden. At least this time, they'll be stored in a safe place.
I also came up with a movie idea while shredding crap I found in my closet. Now I just need to write it down. It'd be a short feature, but I'm sure I could expound off of it and make it a box-office-flop.
I thought I was in terrible shape, but I think it's a combination of this crap weather, having no real purpose and the overall aura in this house that's been draining my energy.
L and I need to get out of here. My only question is where to go? As much as I do miss it there, I'm kinda tired of Moscow and would like to try a different change of scenery. And while I thought I missed this place (the states), both L and I are finding it to be a land of extreme disappointment. To me, America has become a place where people only have time to work a job they dislike so they can stay one step ahead of the Joneses or the bill collectors. No one really seems happy unless they're medicated and even then, it's a simple whitewash of their miserable lives easily seen through. Corruption is hidden under multiple facades of forced smiles, clueless customer service and cold, calculated cordiality. It's even becoming more cost-effective to eat shit-burgers every night than it is to cook your own meals. It's becoming a place where junkmail outnumbers actual mail 20 to 1 and despite a massive job shortage, telemarketing gets outsourced to India.
I swear, the very next dot-head that phones me at 7:30 in the morning hawking viagra or dish network is gonna get an earful.
So, running doesn't seem to be doing any good, but staying and fighting doesn't appear to hold a bright future either. What the hell's happened? How did this happen and what can be done to reverse it? Is this really all there's left to look forward to? I'm not sure if all of this stems from being alone in a country going down the shitter, being alone in a world going down the shitter or simply a matter of getting old. I sincerely hope it's not just a matter of getting old. I mean, if this is it, I'm kinda glad I can't find my gun, though that wouldn't accomplish anything either.
I guess I'll go sleep on it some more, but I'm tired of being tired. I'm also tired of talking about stuff and thinking about it. It's time for action, but in a life of being conditioned to fear and incapability, it's kinda hard to make a decision.