ficlet: Losing Happily Ever After {Broken LexMin, het}
Title: Losing Happily Ever After
Length: one-shot
Author: M_K Yujji
Rating: pg
Genre: angst
Pairing/Characters: Lexy, broken Lexy/Changmin
Warnings: RPF, het
Disclaimer: Though real people are used as characters, this fic bears no resemblance to Real Life and these people are not owned by me.
Comments/Notes: >_> Only one person will understand where this is coming from at all because I never finished and posted anything that would have come before.
Summary: She'd thought she found her happily ever after.
~*~*~
“Don't you think you've had enough, darlin?”
Lexy glared at the bar top and pushed the glass forward a little further. “You're not my father or my... my husband. Just fill up the damned glass.”
The man sighed and did as she asked, leaving the bottle this time when she gestured for him to go away.
Had she had enough?
The vice grip around her chest and the burning just behind her eyes said no.
All her life she'd stayed unattached, never foolish enough to give her heart away to any of the men who'd flitted in and out of it. She'd kept her needs satisfied and never stayed around for more.
A bitter smile twisted her lips.
She should have kept it that way.
She'd been happy enough.
And if she'd sometimes ached for the things she didn't have.... At least she'd never had to deal with this... this... agony.
The light glinted off the ring she'd sat there on the bar when she'd first settled onto the barstool and ordered the first double scotch of the night.
It mocked her.
You thought you could have forever? That any man would want to keep you forever? You? Don't make me laugh.
Her mother's sneering voice echoed though her mind. It hadn't been said yet, but she knew to expect it as soon as she told the woman.
A few tears escaped her control and she wiped them away angrily.
She wasn't the marrying kind. She knew that. She was the woman men wanted to fuck, not the woman they wanted to keep.
But in Changmin she'd thought she'd found something different, someone who cherished the very things that made other men shy away from her in the light of day.
In Changmin, she'd thought she'd found love.
“Fucking jackass,” she muttered, one hand pressing against her chest as she tossed back the drink the bartender had left. “Asshole. Shouldn't have gone back for seconds. One night stands. That's it. Anything else was stupid.”
She was stupid for believing in happily ever afters and true love, for letting herself fall into that trap.
For letting herself fall in love.
She was angry with him for throwing it all away, but she was angrier that he'd ever let her hope in the first place.
Part of her wanted to just throw things. Break things.
She'd already made a mess of their apartment. A cleaning service would have to be called before it was livable again.
And then a real-estate agent to sell it because there was no way in hell she was ever going back to the beautiful home that had been theirs.
She barely managed to bite back a sob, curling into herself, trying to stave off the shattering, suffocating feeling that was threatening to break her.
Vaguely she remembered her own careless assumption that she was tough enough to handle anything.
Back before she'd known what true vulnerability was.
Back before Changmin had wormed his way into the single chink in her armor and weakened the entire foundation.
She reached out and grabbed the ring in her fist, wishing she could throw it away, but unable to do anything more than grip it tightly as the tears refused to be held at bay any longer.
The worst thing of all was the absolute certainty that happily ever after may have slipped from her grasp, but her love for Changmin was never going to let go.
~*~*~
fin
Length: one-shot
Author: M_K Yujji
Rating: pg
Genre: angst
Pairing/Characters: Lexy, broken Lexy/Changmin
Warnings: RPF, het
Disclaimer: Though real people are used as characters, this fic bears no resemblance to Real Life and these people are not owned by me.
Comments/Notes: >_> Only one person will understand where this is coming from at all because I never finished and posted anything that would have come before.
Summary: She'd thought she found her happily ever after.
~*~*~
“Don't you think you've had enough, darlin?”
Lexy glared at the bar top and pushed the glass forward a little further. “You're not my father or my... my husband. Just fill up the damned glass.”
The man sighed and did as she asked, leaving the bottle this time when she gestured for him to go away.
Had she had enough?
The vice grip around her chest and the burning just behind her eyes said no.
All her life she'd stayed unattached, never foolish enough to give her heart away to any of the men who'd flitted in and out of it. She'd kept her needs satisfied and never stayed around for more.
A bitter smile twisted her lips.
She should have kept it that way.
She'd been happy enough.
And if she'd sometimes ached for the things she didn't have.... At least she'd never had to deal with this... this... agony.
The light glinted off the ring she'd sat there on the bar when she'd first settled onto the barstool and ordered the first double scotch of the night.
It mocked her.
You thought you could have forever? That any man would want to keep you forever? You? Don't make me laugh.
Her mother's sneering voice echoed though her mind. It hadn't been said yet, but she knew to expect it as soon as she told the woman.
A few tears escaped her control and she wiped them away angrily.
She wasn't the marrying kind. She knew that. She was the woman men wanted to fuck, not the woman they wanted to keep.
But in Changmin she'd thought she'd found something different, someone who cherished the very things that made other men shy away from her in the light of day.
In Changmin, she'd thought she'd found love.
“Fucking jackass,” she muttered, one hand pressing against her chest as she tossed back the drink the bartender had left. “Asshole. Shouldn't have gone back for seconds. One night stands. That's it. Anything else was stupid.”
She was stupid for believing in happily ever afters and true love, for letting herself fall into that trap.
For letting herself fall in love.
She was angry with him for throwing it all away, but she was angrier that he'd ever let her hope in the first place.
Part of her wanted to just throw things. Break things.
She'd already made a mess of their apartment. A cleaning service would have to be called before it was livable again.
And then a real-estate agent to sell it because there was no way in hell she was ever going back to the beautiful home that had been theirs.
She barely managed to bite back a sob, curling into herself, trying to stave off the shattering, suffocating feeling that was threatening to break her.
Vaguely she remembered her own careless assumption that she was tough enough to handle anything.
Back before she'd known what true vulnerability was.
Back before Changmin had wormed his way into the single chink in her armor and weakened the entire foundation.
She reached out and grabbed the ring in her fist, wishing she could throw it away, but unable to do anything more than grip it tightly as the tears refused to be held at bay any longer.
The worst thing of all was the absolute certainty that happily ever after may have slipped from her grasp, but her love for Changmin was never going to let go.
~*~*~
fin