don't write, just do
Even though my sleep pattern is very off, I feel comfortable enough in writing this. This past week, I shocked my body with a few days of almost no caffeine. I caved in and drank excessive caffeine, which is definitely part of why I'm awake right now. I'm struggling to really learn my mind and body.
My mind frame feels okay, I suppose. My sleep is excessive. I am learning to accept that if my currently outlined goals are to happen, there needs to be yet another, radical and drastic overhaul of my life. What this means, of course, is accepting that more change is needed and to redouble my efforts. Or, I can take what I have and just build off of it. I'm torn, I really am. There is no wrong path, but what should I commit myself to? I definitely have some goals and dreams outlined --how do I turn them into reality? I need to plan, I need to apply all my tools to create myself anew.
One of the contending factors is that there is much doubt within that remains. There is, of course, another perspective to take. Though there is doubt, there is hope. I can, right now, finally say that the light that went out in Europe, that light of 1914 that I compare to my inner light, is turned back on. Or, if awkward prose isn't enough to convey the significance of inner light, then I'll resort to idioms from the 1980s --there is a light and it never goes out
I thought my light had gone out, I really did. Thankfully, as is fairly typical, I was wrong. This is one of many instances in which I am glad to be wrong. I revel in my wrongness, as much as I now revel in my ability to do things differently.
My mind frame feels okay, I suppose. My sleep is excessive. I am learning to accept that if my currently outlined goals are to happen, there needs to be yet another, radical and drastic overhaul of my life. What this means, of course, is accepting that more change is needed and to redouble my efforts. Or, I can take what I have and just build off of it. I'm torn, I really am. There is no wrong path, but what should I commit myself to? I definitely have some goals and dreams outlined --how do I turn them into reality? I need to plan, I need to apply all my tools to create myself anew.
One of the contending factors is that there is much doubt within that remains. There is, of course, another perspective to take. Though there is doubt, there is hope. I can, right now, finally say that the light that went out in Europe, that light of 1914 that I compare to my inner light, is turned back on. Or, if awkward prose isn't enough to convey the significance of inner light, then I'll resort to idioms from the 1980s --there is a light and it never goes out
I thought my light had gone out, I really did. Thankfully, as is fairly typical, I was wrong. This is one of many instances in which I am glad to be wrong. I revel in my wrongness, as much as I now revel in my ability to do things differently.