the 9th entry
For my own edification, and because I have sincerely felt I have been I have been updating more, I decided to check the calendar. This entry, upon its publication, will be the 9th entry. Thus, October will have at least some 9 entries in 12 days.
In the 30 day period of September, I only updated 13 times. Of those 13, the first 7 were done by a comparable period. Why the sudden slow down in the second-half of September? What is going on here? Will October experience a similar trend? Or, as I am hinting at, will October see a rise in numbers once more?
Why should any of this concern anyone? It concerns me, mostly, because it signals to me that since the bulk of these 9 entries have been written since the 7th, in a one week period. What has made the last week so unique?
I am suffering from many an illness right now. Spiritual, emotional, physical, intellectual, etc. As I tried to articulate in the last entry, I think I have gotten better about making the necessary adjustments to survive on a day-to-day basis. Some days are indeed easier. Also, life has a way of affording us breaks when we need them or we create them.
As I may have written here (I don't know; I've taken to becoming verbal diarrhea when talking with friends, and when I'm in a professional setting, I sort of tune out and forget what I'm saying or doing.
There is a total disconnect. Just because I am surviving does not mean I am thriving. Today, for instance, could have been a good day to use the extra time to challenge myself, to grow. But I did not do that.
I slept some 10 hours and then took a 2 hour nap. Now, I know I am sick. I feel so tired, worn out, and haggard. I keep looking at myself in the mirror, and on the days there is no stubble to shave, there is indeed a weariness in my eyes.
The important part to write about here, however, is that nap. I went upstairs for that nap after writing the last entry. That nap was a bit tortuous, as I didn't really necessarily nap, but sort of laid there. Every now and then, as if timed, I'd wake up and find the CD on play to be over. Thus, I heard One Beat, Wild Flag, and The Woods.
Each album made me sad. I heard all three albums (or pieces, as I was drifting in and out) and thought about one of those thoughts that constantly pesters me.
Life is fleeting. That I even got to see and enjoy Sleater-Kinney during there active time was amazing. That opportunity may never present itself again. For better or for worse, they disbanded in 2006 and that was that. Now, as Carrie Brownstein optimistically opined, it is possible that another album could come out. But it won't be the same.
Despite the seasons, the clock, the calendar, emotions, etc, going in circles human conception of time is linear. That is, I suppose, where science and religion diverge. I'm not sure we die, but I'm not sure we go onto be nothing but fertilizer or to some imaginary kingdom above or an inferno below. I don't have answers and I never may.
I've had "The Sense of Reality" by Isaiah Berlin on my mind. It is a good essay, and I'm not entirely certain I can fully grasp what it means. But for now, I won't have the time to figure it out.
It is almost 2:20, I am to meet someone at 3, and I'm not ready. I will be ready in under the wire, but for now there is some stress...
The flexible response is in effect. But what about incremental progress?
In the 30 day period of September, I only updated 13 times. Of those 13, the first 7 were done by a comparable period. Why the sudden slow down in the second-half of September? What is going on here? Will October experience a similar trend? Or, as I am hinting at, will October see a rise in numbers once more?
Why should any of this concern anyone? It concerns me, mostly, because it signals to me that since the bulk of these 9 entries have been written since the 7th, in a one week period. What has made the last week so unique?
I am suffering from many an illness right now. Spiritual, emotional, physical, intellectual, etc. As I tried to articulate in the last entry, I think I have gotten better about making the necessary adjustments to survive on a day-to-day basis. Some days are indeed easier. Also, life has a way of affording us breaks when we need them or we create them.
As I may have written here (I don't know; I've taken to becoming verbal diarrhea when talking with friends, and when I'm in a professional setting, I sort of tune out and forget what I'm saying or doing.
There is a total disconnect. Just because I am surviving does not mean I am thriving. Today, for instance, could have been a good day to use the extra time to challenge myself, to grow. But I did not do that.
I slept some 10 hours and then took a 2 hour nap. Now, I know I am sick. I feel so tired, worn out, and haggard. I keep looking at myself in the mirror, and on the days there is no stubble to shave, there is indeed a weariness in my eyes.
The important part to write about here, however, is that nap. I went upstairs for that nap after writing the last entry. That nap was a bit tortuous, as I didn't really necessarily nap, but sort of laid there. Every now and then, as if timed, I'd wake up and find the CD on play to be over. Thus, I heard One Beat, Wild Flag, and The Woods.
Each album made me sad. I heard all three albums (or pieces, as I was drifting in and out) and thought about one of those thoughts that constantly pesters me.
Life is fleeting. That I even got to see and enjoy Sleater-Kinney during there active time was amazing. That opportunity may never present itself again. For better or for worse, they disbanded in 2006 and that was that. Now, as Carrie Brownstein optimistically opined, it is possible that another album could come out. But it won't be the same.
Despite the seasons, the clock, the calendar, emotions, etc, going in circles human conception of time is linear. That is, I suppose, where science and religion diverge. I'm not sure we die, but I'm not sure we go onto be nothing but fertilizer or to some imaginary kingdom above or an inferno below. I don't have answers and I never may.
I've had "The Sense of Reality" by Isaiah Berlin on my mind. It is a good essay, and I'm not entirely certain I can fully grasp what it means. But for now, I won't have the time to figure it out.
It is almost 2:20, I am to meet someone at 3, and I'm not ready. I will be ready in under the wire, but for now there is some stress...
The flexible response is in effect. But what about incremental progress?