Sweet Revenge, Sweet Love, Sweet Irony, Ch. 6
Title: Sweet Revenge, Sweet Love, Sweet Irony
Author: kissthecoffin
Pairing: Jaemin, YunJae, JaeSu and more ^^;
Summary: When a bitter Changmin finds an unconscious and almost dead Jaejoong, a headstrong delinquent, gets in over his head in a fight and ends up unconscious on the brink of death in between the apartments owned by Shim Changmin, the son of Korea’s richest man and a member of one of the most famous bands in Asia. When Changmin recognizes him from their school days, he decides to take him in and nurse him back to health, but not for free, of course. Changmin’s revenge for Jaejoong’s treatment of him in the past? Of course, Jaejoong will become his personal sex maid.
Warnings (for now and later): Rape, sadistic Changmin, language, male-cross dressing, smex(later) and a newbie writer. :P
Story rating: PG13 to NC17
Jaejoong's pupils were shaking as memories flowed into his mind.
What about what he had done? How could he be angry at Changmin when he was just gaining the vengeance he deserved? Everything was spinning at a dizzying rate in his head. Faces of people he trusted and hated swam before his open eyes, slowly morphing and become one. Who could he trust now?
“Did you really not remember?” Changmin’s voice floated softly from his door, his eyes searching Jaejoong's face.
Jaejoong quickly turned his face away, feeling a hot blush creeping up his neck, “No, I didn’t remember.” he didn’t want to look at his face, didn’t want to see the cold hatred that he knew was lurking there.
“Don’t look away from me. I want to see the look in your eyes.” he commanded, almost as if he could read his thoughts, walking forward and turning Jaejoong's face back towards his. “I want you to wallow in the shame of what you did to me and then I’m going to crush you within an inch of your life.”
“I envied you.” Jaejoong blurted out, unable to stop the words from flying from his mouth.
Changmin recoiled immediately, giving Jaejoong a shocked look. “What do you mean?”
“You were popular, rich, and everyone liked you. It pissed me off. How could you be so loved yet you did all the same stupid shit I did?” Jaejoong drew a long breath, tears once again stinging his eyes.“But, fuck. Anger has changed you a lot, Changmin. You look nothing like I remember. I don't feel the sociable and likeable feeling that you used to have. Everything about you is warped now.”
“It was because of you that I changed. Because of what you did.” Changmin shot back, his eyes showing no emotional change.
“I’m sorry, Changmin. I’m so sorry for what I did to you...”
“Shut up!” Changmin shouted, anger flaring in his eyes, “My mother is dead because of you! You took away my family's happiness, and even now your trying to take my brother away from me! Don’t act as if begging for forgiveness is going to make things better.”
“What is ruining my life going to do for you?” Jaejoong questioned, tears now pouring down his cheeks, “Ruining me won’t bring back your Mom and it won't reverse what has happened. How would she feel if she saw you doing this? If she saw you so angry and sad? Isn't there some way to just let things rest once and for all?”
“I’ll let things rest when you’re so broken you can’t even stand on your own two feet.” Changmin spat in a deadly voice, turning on his heal and striding from the room.
“I’ve got to get out of here.” Jaejoong breathed in a fearful voice, almost too scared to move.What was he going to do to him? He doubted he would kill him, but he doubted that he would stop Junsu and Heechul if they ever decided to play with him again.
His hands were shaking violently as he moved from the bed and stumbled towards his dresser. During his stay with Changmin, Yunho and taken him out to buy clothes so he wouldn’t have to wear the something for the rest of his stay. As he stuffed his clothes into his bag, Jaejoong came across a blue and white striped scarf…a gift from Yunho. The memory of when they’d bought this flashed through his mind.
-------
“See this one, Jaejoong? These colors really match you.” Yunho called as he draped a blue-and-white scarf around Jaejoong’s neck.
“How so?” Jaejoong questioned, playfully fishing for a compliment.
“It makes your eyes stand out and gives you skin a very smooth, milky look.” Yunho whispered, letting his fingers feather across Jaejoong’s cheek.
“I guess...I’ll get this one then.” Jaejoong breathed, mesmerized by Yunho’s intense gaze.
---------
Jaejoong reached up and touched his cheek, he could still feel the tingle that had raced across his face at his touch…it had been like something had lit fire to his face with how warm it got. Of course, this had only made Yunho laugh.
Jaejoong smiled fondly at the scarf, feeling that he couldn’t leave Yunho without first setting things to rest. Standing from his place on the floor, Jaejoong padded out of his room and down the hall toYunho’s room. “Yunho, are you there?” Jaejoong called, knocking softly on the door.
When no one answered, he timidly pushed the door open, his eyes being greeted by an Korean-Japanese inspired room. The room was clean, which just screamed Yunho in every aspect.The walls were painted a brunt umber, with accents of white and deep red placed neatly about the room. On the walls were pictures of sunsets in Japan along with a few pictures of Korean flowers.The bed was large and extended from the north wall, blood red covers were folded neatly across the beds form. Jaejoong looked at the photo on Yunho's bedstand. Two smiling boys. This must be him and Changmin..., he thought putting the photo down.
The one thing that really caught Jaejoong off guard was the fact that Yunho's scent clung to every part of the room. He smelled like freshly baked pastries sometimes. Jaejoong remembered when he’d asked him about that once.
“You smell just like cookies. Why?” Jaejoong breathed, placing his nose on Yunho’s shoulder and breathing deeply.
“That’s because I bake quite a bit.” Yunho laughed, ruffling Jaejoong’s hair.
“Whoa, a guy who likes baking. Imagine if people learned that.” he teased as he ducked out from under Yunho's hand.
“Go ahead and tell them, but I won’t bake you a single thing for the rest of my life if you do.” Yunho shot back, trying to act serious but failing miserably.
“Aw, you know you can’t resist giving me anything I want.” Jaejoong cooed, standing on tip-toe to return the favor of ruffling his hair.
“That’s very true.” He replied in a fond voice, brown eyes giving Jaejoong an unreadable look.
A feeling of calm washed over him as he shuffled towards his bed, pulling in a large breath as he did so. It felt as if no one could reach him when he was in this room, no one could hurt him or betray him when he was here. Sighing softly, he curled up on the bed, his face tilted towards the covers, a feeling of drowsiness coming over him. Within five minutes, Jaejoong was sleeping soundly.
----
Shim Changmin sat in his library nursing a glass of brandy, his mood looking rather stormy as he sat there in the dim lighting.He had been contemplating everything Jaejoong had said to him that evening. How he’d envied him, how much he’d wanted to be like him…how sorry he was for what he’d done, and the thing that kept playing over and over in his head were his words about his revenge on him.
“Ruining me won’t bring back your Mom and it won't reverse what has happened. How would she feel if she saw you doing this? If she saw you so angry and sad? Isn't there some way to just let things rest once and for all?”
Over and over again in his head those words played, making him angry and doubtful in turns. Changmin gripped his pounding head, trying to force out the buzzing thoughts. He needed him out of his head for one day so he could just relax and forget.
----
“Nine thirty already.” Yunho sighed, his shoulders slumping slightly as he trudged back to his room, a book nestled in his arm along with a tray of cookies.
Yunho had kept himself busy all day. He didn’t know if he could take being around Jaejoong when he kept shooting that betrayed look at him. Every time he looked at him that way, it made him feel like crawling into a hole and never coming out again. It felt as if the whole world was ready to condemn him for the one thing he couldn't control.
Pushing open the door to his bedroom, Yunho sucked in a surprised breath when he saw Jaejoong curled up on his bed, fast asleep. “Jaejoong.” He sighed, walking over to his desk to set the tray and book down. He stood at the foot of the bed watching him, listening to him slowly breathing. He saw that he had the scarf he’d bought him clutched in his left hand as if he wasn’t willing to let it go.
Jaejoong stirred. “Yunho...why...?”
With those words he slowly reached down and shook him awake, his eyes full of sadness.
----
Jaejoong felt himself being pulled from his dreams, a familiar voice drifting through his sleepy haze. “Yunho?” he questioned, rolling into his back and letting his eyes flutter open. Sure enough, there was Yunho, his hand placed gently on Jaejoong's shoulder, and his face looking sad. Remembering where he was, Jaejoong blushed and began scooting off the bed, “I’m sorry, Yunho, I didn’t mean to fall asleep in here…I came to talk to you…but you weren’t here…so I laid down on your bed and fell asleep.” Jaejoong explained quickly, gesturing towards the bed as he spoke.
Yunho laughed softly moving towards his desk to grab the tray of cookies, “Well then, would you care to talk to me over these?”
Jaejoong’s eyes shifted to the cookies, a soft look of pain coming to his eyes. “I don’t want to interrupt your evening,” he muttered quickly, watching Yunho set the tray down before he turned to leave the room.
“Having you eat with me is the most pleasing interruption I could ask for.” Yunho stated softly as he extended his hand to grab Jaejoong's wrist.
Jaejoong jumped slightly as Yunho's warm hand curled around his freezing wrist, he felt the urge to pull away, but quickly shattered it to pieces, not wanting to seem awkward with his best friend. “You're not going to poke my stomach while I'm eating, are you?”
“Of course not, unless I see you eating all the my cookies.” Yunho teased lightly, getting the atmosphere back to its usually level of fun.
“Very funny.” Jaejoong said, trying to hide the blush creeping up his cheeks by quickly moving towards the bed. “Just for that, I’m going to eat them all and leave you none.”
“You were always my little piglet, what difference does it make now?” The smile on his face showed he was joking with him.
Jaejoong chuckled, “Oh, whatever!” Their conversation lagged after that, both ate in silence, watching and waiting for the other to speak. Jaejoong broke the silence, his fingers working through the soft scarf in his hands. “I'm sorry. I'm truly a sick excuse for a person for what I did to your mother.” Jaejoong said, trying to form his jumbled thoughts into something that resembled a human language.
Yunho let out a slow breath, his face relaxing visibly in the dim lighting. “Thank you, Jaejoong, but they're is no need to apologize.” Yunho wrapped his arms around the trembling man next to him, “When she called Changmin, she only had a few minutes left, there was nothing anyone could do. My step-father and I were right next to her when she called Changmin. She just wanted to know he was alright before she passed away. So don't blame yourself for killing her.”
Jaejoong felt relieved that Yunho didn't blame him but he knew Changmin wouldn't accept that explaination. After a while Jaejoong decided to tell Yunho, “I’m planning on leaving here. Changmin is planning on crushing me to dust. I would be an idiot if I didn’t get out of here now.”
Yunho blinked at Jaejoong, almost unwilling to hear what he was saying. He was leaving this house, meaning he was leaving him. “I would offer to be your bodyguard but I don’t think you would stay anyways.”
“No, I wouldn’t but thanks for the offer.” he laughed, poking him in the neck.
Out of reflex, Yunho’s arm swung around and knocked into Jaejoong’s abdomen, the force of which sent both of them toppling back onto the bed.
Jaejoong had clamped his eyes shut as they had both fallen onto the bed; however they shot open when he felt someone else on top of him. There was Yunho, hovering over him, eyes searching his with an intense look.“Will you stay with me tonight, Jaejoong?”
“S-stay with you?” he questioned in a soft voice.
“Yes.” Yunho whispered lightly, lowering his lips to meet his in a soft kiss. Jaejoong pursed his lips, a prickle of panic washing over him. He felt too open, like he had that night when Heechul and Junsu had attacked him. He could feel his panic quickly growing. The fact that it was Yunho kissing him made no difference; he felt a growing need to get away almost a feeling of self-preservation. Yunho felt Jaejoong tense so he pulled away looked down at him, “Are you alright?”
“I’m just a little claustrophobic.” Jaejoong whispered; panic beginning to show in his eyes as he squirmed underneath him, trying to free himself.
“I see…” Yunho muttered before rolling over on the bed and pulling Jaejoong on top of him, “is this better?”
Jaejoong quickly sat up and pulled in a deep breath, his hand shaking slightly as he moved them though Yunho's hair.Yunho pushed himself up on his hands, half his body still pinned down by Jaejoong. “If this isn’t something you want, than you can leave but if you only wanted to stop because you felt claustrophobic…then why don’t you try kissing me?”
Jaejoong looked at Yunho for a long moment, his words slowly circling in his head. “Okay.” he whispered softly, his face coming within half-an-inch of Yunho's before he stopped, his eyes clouding slightly, “I don’t know Yunho, I just…”
Yunho smiled softly and grabbed Jaejoong’s lips in a deep kiss, ignoring his startled flinch as he tried to make him relax in his arms. A thousand different feelings and emotions raced through Jaejoong’s mind as he slowly gave in to Yunho’s demanding kiss, his own lips parting slightly to return it.
“Jaejoong...” Yunho muttered between breaths. Was this his friendly Korean-Japanese buddy? No. Was it the person he’d always thought of as a brother? Most definitely not. So what did he view him as…? He wasn’t sure he understood the character that Yunho was showing now. He was nothing like his usual sweet self. Not with such an intense heat pouring off his body but he could still feel that he cared for him, that he wouldn’t hurt him or do anything to him. He felt safe.
“I take it this means you’ll stay.” Yunho breathed as he pulled away from the kiss, eyes glowing with a fever only he could put to rest.
“No,” Jaejoong grazed his lips over Yunho's cheek. “But why not make my last night a memorable one?”
----
“How goes the plan, Minnie?” Heechul sang out, barging into the recording room much at the protest of the producer.
“It failed completely.” Changmin growled, “There was no way I could even pretend to love such a disgusting person.”
“Do you want us to get him again?” Junsu started, “This time you don't have to save him, you know.”
“No, I have better things planned to crush his spirits.” Changmin lied. His mind had been plagued by what Jaejoong had said the night before. How would she feel if she saw you doing this?
Heechul and Junsu, along with Yoochun stared at their friend walk out of the recording room hurriedly. It was the first time in their four year friendship had they seen Changmin flustered.
----
Yunho turned and nestled Jaejoong in his arms, knowing the older one was awake. “Do you have anywhere you can go?”
“I’ll find a place.”
Yunho lifted himself up on his elbow, giving Jaejoong and reproving look, “You can’t tell me that you’re just going to go and stay on the streets again.”
“Then I won’t tell you.” Jaejoong replied, coldly reverting back to his old personality.
“Is being out on the street really so much safer than being here?” Yunho questioned, a look of frustration on his face. “Changmin may be mean, but there are people much worse than him out there. You should just stay till I can find you a place to stay.”
“I don’t need your protection, Yunho. I’ve lived on the street before, it’s not like it’s going to be any different besides...now that I don't feel the need to fight all the time maybe I can get a job and start a normal life.” Jaejoong responded, his voice sounding slightly perturbed. He locked gazes with him, a cold glint sitting within his eyes. “Do you really care about what’s best for me? Or do you just want me to stay here because you like having me around?”
“How can you even suggest that I don’t care, Jaejoong? Everything I’m saying is because I’m worried about you! Even though I do want you next to me, I wouldn’t be so cruel as he keep you here if you had somewhere else to go.”
“Can you just stop trying to be my savior and let me do things the way I know how?” Jaejoong chocked out. Why is Yunho making it even harder than it is?
“So I take that to means your going back to a street corner.” Yunho sighed, resting himself on the backboard of the bed with a frustrated groan. Yunho gave Jaejoong time to cool. “I'm sorry. I'm concerned about you, Jaejoong.”
“My life has never been fun and flowers, Yunho. I was bullied all through middle school, my parents got arrested, I got picked up by a gang, raped, ruined your relation with your brother, and then got stuck under the command of a guy who hates my living guts.” Jaejoong stated in a bland voice, “You're really the only good thing that's happened to me in my life, but it'd be best if you'd forget you met Kim Jaejoong.”
It was scary how different Jaejoong was now. Everything about him was cold and distant, like he’d been hurt so many times that he’d just stopped trying to pick himself up and just covered himself with a shell so the blows of the people around him wouldn’t affect him.“You make me doubt that you have any feelings for me, let alone anyone, Jaejoong.”
“Would I have sex with you after all I've been though if I didn't feel anything?” Jaejoong coldly responded, staring at the ceiling as he had been after Heechul and Junsu had been done with him.
“There's really no way your staying, huh?” Yunho sighed, joining him in admiring the ceiling, “Can you at least stay with me a little longer? Changmin doesn't come home until four anyways...”
Jaejoong wanted to keep his icy compouser but Yunho's warmth melted the remaining ice in him. He managed to blankly stare at Yunho's profile and mumble, “I guess that'd be okay.”
A/N: Um. Not too happy with this chapter for many reasons! See if you can find them. xD (An obvious one, my computer fucked up so "his" turned into "him" a lot).
Author: kissthecoffin
Pairing: Jaemin, YunJae, JaeSu and more ^^;
Summary: When a bitter Changmin finds an unconscious and almost dead Jaejoong, a headstrong delinquent, gets in over his head in a fight and ends up unconscious on the brink of death in between the apartments owned by Shim Changmin, the son of Korea’s richest man and a member of one of the most famous bands in Asia. When Changmin recognizes him from their school days, he decides to take him in and nurse him back to health, but not for free, of course. Changmin’s revenge for Jaejoong’s treatment of him in the past? Of course, Jaejoong will become his personal sex maid.
Warnings (for now and later): Rape, sadistic Changmin, language, male-cross dressing, smex(later) and a newbie writer. :P
Story rating: PG13 to NC17
Jaejoong's pupils were shaking as memories flowed into his mind.
What about what he had done? How could he be angry at Changmin when he was just gaining the vengeance he deserved? Everything was spinning at a dizzying rate in his head. Faces of people he trusted and hated swam before his open eyes, slowly morphing and become one. Who could he trust now?
“Did you really not remember?” Changmin’s voice floated softly from his door, his eyes searching Jaejoong's face.
Jaejoong quickly turned his face away, feeling a hot blush creeping up his neck, “No, I didn’t remember.” he didn’t want to look at his face, didn’t want to see the cold hatred that he knew was lurking there.
“Don’t look away from me. I want to see the look in your eyes.” he commanded, almost as if he could read his thoughts, walking forward and turning Jaejoong's face back towards his. “I want you to wallow in the shame of what you did to me and then I’m going to crush you within an inch of your life.”
“I envied you.” Jaejoong blurted out, unable to stop the words from flying from his mouth.
Changmin recoiled immediately, giving Jaejoong a shocked look. “What do you mean?”
“You were popular, rich, and everyone liked you. It pissed me off. How could you be so loved yet you did all the same stupid shit I did?” Jaejoong drew a long breath, tears once again stinging his eyes.“But, fuck. Anger has changed you a lot, Changmin. You look nothing like I remember. I don't feel the sociable and likeable feeling that you used to have. Everything about you is warped now.”
“It was because of you that I changed. Because of what you did.” Changmin shot back, his eyes showing no emotional change.
“I’m sorry, Changmin. I’m so sorry for what I did to you...”
“Shut up!” Changmin shouted, anger flaring in his eyes, “My mother is dead because of you! You took away my family's happiness, and even now your trying to take my brother away from me! Don’t act as if begging for forgiveness is going to make things better.”
“What is ruining my life going to do for you?” Jaejoong questioned, tears now pouring down his cheeks, “Ruining me won’t bring back your Mom and it won't reverse what has happened. How would she feel if she saw you doing this? If she saw you so angry and sad? Isn't there some way to just let things rest once and for all?”
“I’ll let things rest when you’re so broken you can’t even stand on your own two feet.” Changmin spat in a deadly voice, turning on his heal and striding from the room.
“I’ve got to get out of here.” Jaejoong breathed in a fearful voice, almost too scared to move.What was he going to do to him? He doubted he would kill him, but he doubted that he would stop Junsu and Heechul if they ever decided to play with him again.
His hands were shaking violently as he moved from the bed and stumbled towards his dresser. During his stay with Changmin, Yunho and taken him out to buy clothes so he wouldn’t have to wear the something for the rest of his stay. As he stuffed his clothes into his bag, Jaejoong came across a blue and white striped scarf…a gift from Yunho. The memory of when they’d bought this flashed through his mind.
-------
“See this one, Jaejoong? These colors really match you.” Yunho called as he draped a blue-and-white scarf around Jaejoong’s neck.
“How so?” Jaejoong questioned, playfully fishing for a compliment.
“It makes your eyes stand out and gives you skin a very smooth, milky look.” Yunho whispered, letting his fingers feather across Jaejoong’s cheek.
“I guess...I’ll get this one then.” Jaejoong breathed, mesmerized by Yunho’s intense gaze.
---------
Jaejoong reached up and touched his cheek, he could still feel the tingle that had raced across his face at his touch…it had been like something had lit fire to his face with how warm it got. Of course, this had only made Yunho laugh.
Jaejoong smiled fondly at the scarf, feeling that he couldn’t leave Yunho without first setting things to rest. Standing from his place on the floor, Jaejoong padded out of his room and down the hall toYunho’s room. “Yunho, are you there?” Jaejoong called, knocking softly on the door.
When no one answered, he timidly pushed the door open, his eyes being greeted by an Korean-Japanese inspired room. The room was clean, which just screamed Yunho in every aspect.The walls were painted a brunt umber, with accents of white and deep red placed neatly about the room. On the walls were pictures of sunsets in Japan along with a few pictures of Korean flowers.The bed was large and extended from the north wall, blood red covers were folded neatly across the beds form. Jaejoong looked at the photo on Yunho's bedstand. Two smiling boys. This must be him and Changmin..., he thought putting the photo down.
The one thing that really caught Jaejoong off guard was the fact that Yunho's scent clung to every part of the room. He smelled like freshly baked pastries sometimes. Jaejoong remembered when he’d asked him about that once.
“You smell just like cookies. Why?” Jaejoong breathed, placing his nose on Yunho’s shoulder and breathing deeply.
“That’s because I bake quite a bit.” Yunho laughed, ruffling Jaejoong’s hair.
“Whoa, a guy who likes baking. Imagine if people learned that.” he teased as he ducked out from under Yunho's hand.
“Go ahead and tell them, but I won’t bake you a single thing for the rest of my life if you do.” Yunho shot back, trying to act serious but failing miserably.
“Aw, you know you can’t resist giving me anything I want.” Jaejoong cooed, standing on tip-toe to return the favor of ruffling his hair.
“That’s very true.” He replied in a fond voice, brown eyes giving Jaejoong an unreadable look.
A feeling of calm washed over him as he shuffled towards his bed, pulling in a large breath as he did so. It felt as if no one could reach him when he was in this room, no one could hurt him or betray him when he was here. Sighing softly, he curled up on the bed, his face tilted towards the covers, a feeling of drowsiness coming over him. Within five minutes, Jaejoong was sleeping soundly.
----
Shim Changmin sat in his library nursing a glass of brandy, his mood looking rather stormy as he sat there in the dim lighting.He had been contemplating everything Jaejoong had said to him that evening. How he’d envied him, how much he’d wanted to be like him…how sorry he was for what he’d done, and the thing that kept playing over and over in his head were his words about his revenge on him.
“Ruining me won’t bring back your Mom and it won't reverse what has happened. How would she feel if she saw you doing this? If she saw you so angry and sad? Isn't there some way to just let things rest once and for all?”
Over and over again in his head those words played, making him angry and doubtful in turns. Changmin gripped his pounding head, trying to force out the buzzing thoughts. He needed him out of his head for one day so he could just relax and forget.
----
“Nine thirty already.” Yunho sighed, his shoulders slumping slightly as he trudged back to his room, a book nestled in his arm along with a tray of cookies.
Yunho had kept himself busy all day. He didn’t know if he could take being around Jaejoong when he kept shooting that betrayed look at him. Every time he looked at him that way, it made him feel like crawling into a hole and never coming out again. It felt as if the whole world was ready to condemn him for the one thing he couldn't control.
Pushing open the door to his bedroom, Yunho sucked in a surprised breath when he saw Jaejoong curled up on his bed, fast asleep. “Jaejoong.” He sighed, walking over to his desk to set the tray and book down. He stood at the foot of the bed watching him, listening to him slowly breathing. He saw that he had the scarf he’d bought him clutched in his left hand as if he wasn’t willing to let it go.
Jaejoong stirred. “Yunho...why...?”
With those words he slowly reached down and shook him awake, his eyes full of sadness.
----
Jaejoong felt himself being pulled from his dreams, a familiar voice drifting through his sleepy haze. “Yunho?” he questioned, rolling into his back and letting his eyes flutter open. Sure enough, there was Yunho, his hand placed gently on Jaejoong's shoulder, and his face looking sad. Remembering where he was, Jaejoong blushed and began scooting off the bed, “I’m sorry, Yunho, I didn’t mean to fall asleep in here…I came to talk to you…but you weren’t here…so I laid down on your bed and fell asleep.” Jaejoong explained quickly, gesturing towards the bed as he spoke.
Yunho laughed softly moving towards his desk to grab the tray of cookies, “Well then, would you care to talk to me over these?”
Jaejoong’s eyes shifted to the cookies, a soft look of pain coming to his eyes. “I don’t want to interrupt your evening,” he muttered quickly, watching Yunho set the tray down before he turned to leave the room.
“Having you eat with me is the most pleasing interruption I could ask for.” Yunho stated softly as he extended his hand to grab Jaejoong's wrist.
Jaejoong jumped slightly as Yunho's warm hand curled around his freezing wrist, he felt the urge to pull away, but quickly shattered it to pieces, not wanting to seem awkward with his best friend. “You're not going to poke my stomach while I'm eating, are you?”
“Of course not, unless I see you eating all the my cookies.” Yunho teased lightly, getting the atmosphere back to its usually level of fun.
“Very funny.” Jaejoong said, trying to hide the blush creeping up his cheeks by quickly moving towards the bed. “Just for that, I’m going to eat them all and leave you none.”
“You were always my little piglet, what difference does it make now?” The smile on his face showed he was joking with him.
Jaejoong chuckled, “Oh, whatever!” Their conversation lagged after that, both ate in silence, watching and waiting for the other to speak. Jaejoong broke the silence, his fingers working through the soft scarf in his hands. “I'm sorry. I'm truly a sick excuse for a person for what I did to your mother.” Jaejoong said, trying to form his jumbled thoughts into something that resembled a human language.
Yunho let out a slow breath, his face relaxing visibly in the dim lighting. “Thank you, Jaejoong, but they're is no need to apologize.” Yunho wrapped his arms around the trembling man next to him, “When she called Changmin, she only had a few minutes left, there was nothing anyone could do. My step-father and I were right next to her when she called Changmin. She just wanted to know he was alright before she passed away. So don't blame yourself for killing her.”
Jaejoong felt relieved that Yunho didn't blame him but he knew Changmin wouldn't accept that explaination. After a while Jaejoong decided to tell Yunho, “I’m planning on leaving here. Changmin is planning on crushing me to dust. I would be an idiot if I didn’t get out of here now.”
Yunho blinked at Jaejoong, almost unwilling to hear what he was saying. He was leaving this house, meaning he was leaving him. “I would offer to be your bodyguard but I don’t think you would stay anyways.”
“No, I wouldn’t but thanks for the offer.” he laughed, poking him in the neck.
Out of reflex, Yunho’s arm swung around and knocked into Jaejoong’s abdomen, the force of which sent both of them toppling back onto the bed.
Jaejoong had clamped his eyes shut as they had both fallen onto the bed; however they shot open when he felt someone else on top of him. There was Yunho, hovering over him, eyes searching his with an intense look.“Will you stay with me tonight, Jaejoong?”
“S-stay with you?” he questioned in a soft voice.
“Yes.” Yunho whispered lightly, lowering his lips to meet his in a soft kiss. Jaejoong pursed his lips, a prickle of panic washing over him. He felt too open, like he had that night when Heechul and Junsu had attacked him. He could feel his panic quickly growing. The fact that it was Yunho kissing him made no difference; he felt a growing need to get away almost a feeling of self-preservation. Yunho felt Jaejoong tense so he pulled away looked down at him, “Are you alright?”
“I’m just a little claustrophobic.” Jaejoong whispered; panic beginning to show in his eyes as he squirmed underneath him, trying to free himself.
“I see…” Yunho muttered before rolling over on the bed and pulling Jaejoong on top of him, “is this better?”
Jaejoong quickly sat up and pulled in a deep breath, his hand shaking slightly as he moved them though Yunho's hair.Yunho pushed himself up on his hands, half his body still pinned down by Jaejoong. “If this isn’t something you want, than you can leave but if you only wanted to stop because you felt claustrophobic…then why don’t you try kissing me?”
Jaejoong looked at Yunho for a long moment, his words slowly circling in his head. “Okay.” he whispered softly, his face coming within half-an-inch of Yunho's before he stopped, his eyes clouding slightly, “I don’t know Yunho, I just…”
Yunho smiled softly and grabbed Jaejoong’s lips in a deep kiss, ignoring his startled flinch as he tried to make him relax in his arms. A thousand different feelings and emotions raced through Jaejoong’s mind as he slowly gave in to Yunho’s demanding kiss, his own lips parting slightly to return it.
“Jaejoong...” Yunho muttered between breaths. Was this his friendly Korean-Japanese buddy? No. Was it the person he’d always thought of as a brother? Most definitely not. So what did he view him as…? He wasn’t sure he understood the character that Yunho was showing now. He was nothing like his usual sweet self. Not with such an intense heat pouring off his body but he could still feel that he cared for him, that he wouldn’t hurt him or do anything to him. He felt safe.
“I take it this means you’ll stay.” Yunho breathed as he pulled away from the kiss, eyes glowing with a fever only he could put to rest.
“No,” Jaejoong grazed his lips over Yunho's cheek. “But why not make my last night a memorable one?”
----
“How goes the plan, Minnie?” Heechul sang out, barging into the recording room much at the protest of the producer.
“It failed completely.” Changmin growled, “There was no way I could even pretend to love such a disgusting person.”
“Do you want us to get him again?” Junsu started, “This time you don't have to save him, you know.”
“No, I have better things planned to crush his spirits.” Changmin lied. His mind had been plagued by what Jaejoong had said the night before. How would she feel if she saw you doing this?
Heechul and Junsu, along with Yoochun stared at their friend walk out of the recording room hurriedly. It was the first time in their four year friendship had they seen Changmin flustered.
----
Yunho turned and nestled Jaejoong in his arms, knowing the older one was awake. “Do you have anywhere you can go?”
“I’ll find a place.”
Yunho lifted himself up on his elbow, giving Jaejoong and reproving look, “You can’t tell me that you’re just going to go and stay on the streets again.”
“Then I won’t tell you.” Jaejoong replied, coldly reverting back to his old personality.
“Is being out on the street really so much safer than being here?” Yunho questioned, a look of frustration on his face. “Changmin may be mean, but there are people much worse than him out there. You should just stay till I can find you a place to stay.”
“I don’t need your protection, Yunho. I’ve lived on the street before, it’s not like it’s going to be any different besides...now that I don't feel the need to fight all the time maybe I can get a job and start a normal life.” Jaejoong responded, his voice sounding slightly perturbed. He locked gazes with him, a cold glint sitting within his eyes. “Do you really care about what’s best for me? Or do you just want me to stay here because you like having me around?”
“How can you even suggest that I don’t care, Jaejoong? Everything I’m saying is because I’m worried about you! Even though I do want you next to me, I wouldn’t be so cruel as he keep you here if you had somewhere else to go.”
“Can you just stop trying to be my savior and let me do things the way I know how?” Jaejoong chocked out. Why is Yunho making it even harder than it is?
“So I take that to means your going back to a street corner.” Yunho sighed, resting himself on the backboard of the bed with a frustrated groan. Yunho gave Jaejoong time to cool. “I'm sorry. I'm concerned about you, Jaejoong.”
“My life has never been fun and flowers, Yunho. I was bullied all through middle school, my parents got arrested, I got picked up by a gang, raped, ruined your relation with your brother, and then got stuck under the command of a guy who hates my living guts.” Jaejoong stated in a bland voice, “You're really the only good thing that's happened to me in my life, but it'd be best if you'd forget you met Kim Jaejoong.”
It was scary how different Jaejoong was now. Everything about him was cold and distant, like he’d been hurt so many times that he’d just stopped trying to pick himself up and just covered himself with a shell so the blows of the people around him wouldn’t affect him.“You make me doubt that you have any feelings for me, let alone anyone, Jaejoong.”
“Would I have sex with you after all I've been though if I didn't feel anything?” Jaejoong coldly responded, staring at the ceiling as he had been after Heechul and Junsu had been done with him.
“There's really no way your staying, huh?” Yunho sighed, joining him in admiring the ceiling, “Can you at least stay with me a little longer? Changmin doesn't come home until four anyways...”
Jaejoong wanted to keep his icy compouser but Yunho's warmth melted the remaining ice in him. He managed to blankly stare at Yunho's profile and mumble, “I guess that'd be okay.”
A/N: Um. Not too happy with this chapter for many reasons! See if you can find them. xD (An obvious one, my computer fucked up so "his" turned into "him" a lot).