(no subject)
The wedding was good. I honestly didn't expect to have "fun" at an all black born-again christian wedding, but I guess that was pretty judgemental of me. I just figured it wasnt about having fun, it was about supporting my step-sister and seeing her happy. I ended up having a good time though. I stayed with her best friend from high school the whole time, and her new brother in law, whom was really hot for a brotha and had a huge crush on me. We split a bottle of wine in my room before the reception since it was a cash bar wedding, considering "drinking is a sin" but whatev, I had me fun. I had to give a toast since I was the maid of honer... That was intresting. I was the only one that DIDN'T quote a passage from the bible, but no one cared. I spoke from my heart and I meant what I said. I'm so happy for Nicole, she truly looked like a princess. Thats not what I said....I was kind of buzzed so it either sounded better or worse, I don't know. I do remember saying "I couldn't wait to see them at their 24th aniversary", not 25th. Rob and I managed to only get into one giant argument because I made him buy me a baithing suit. lets be serious, we'll probably go back to not talking for another 6 months because he was so salty about it. I hate fucking with his head I honestly always feel bad. He just has a lot of growing up to do. He needs to find a nice girl, I'm not her. I'm not really a nice girl anymore anyway. The hotel was awesome, spa, sauna, pool, jaquzi, right off the beach. I did them all, while heavily intoxicated...so I'm not complaining. I was thinking about justin for most of the time, and how he told chris he was still in love with me and he wanted to marry me, it fucked me up a little, but I'd rather know than not know.
We made settlement today on the house in audobon, which means we move in 2 weeks. Its sad, but its all happening for a reason. I'm trying to embrace this change, and I'm honestly over being so upset about it. Crying won't make my home not sell. Magill ave will always be home. I've grown up with everyone on this block and I don't know anyone else in THE WORLD that is as close to their neighbors as we are. Holidays, birthdays, block parties, we were ridiculous with that shit. I'll miss it. Its not the end of the world though, I guess its just a new begining.
NO matter what I do, I can't help but be a little aprehensive about the future. I try not to worry about it, I try to work hard and act like I love what I'm doing, but I cant help but feel as though I've been forced into all this. I'm not complaining though, just sayin the facts. I really do feel like I haven't changed since I was 16, I just have better hair now. I mean, I wake up somedays and I feel like I knew more THEN, than I do now. Maybe I didn't know more, I just thought I did, and now I realize I don't know shit about the world, and its a scary feeling.
We made settlement today on the house in audobon, which means we move in 2 weeks. Its sad, but its all happening for a reason. I'm trying to embrace this change, and I'm honestly over being so upset about it. Crying won't make my home not sell. Magill ave will always be home. I've grown up with everyone on this block and I don't know anyone else in THE WORLD that is as close to their neighbors as we are. Holidays, birthdays, block parties, we were ridiculous with that shit. I'll miss it. Its not the end of the world though, I guess its just a new begining.
NO matter what I do, I can't help but be a little aprehensive about the future. I try not to worry about it, I try to work hard and act like I love what I'm doing, but I cant help but feel as though I've been forced into all this. I'm not complaining though, just sayin the facts. I really do feel like I haven't changed since I was 16, I just have better hair now. I mean, I wake up somedays and I feel like I knew more THEN, than I do now. Maybe I didn't know more, I just thought I did, and now I realize I don't know shit about the world, and its a scary feeling.