(no subject)
Ugh. I had the most horrible, horrible dream- the cat had been bit by a dog, and I take it to a vet and swear to give her all my money if she can fix him, and she packs up to leave and says "Oh, sorry, I have to go do this experiement where we put this rabbit in a tank and suck all the air out." So I ask WHY she would suffocate a harmless bunny and she says "Well, that is how we would put your cat to sleep... you being there isn't helping either one of you." She is convinced that kitty is dying and that I should stick him in her twisted tank to put him out of his misery. I pack him up and fire her, but then wander around the rest of the dream sobbing, convinced my cat is dying and why can't I find a vet? UGH. I woke up as tired as if I had been sobbing that much. Animal death is tied with two other things I can't handle: people being homeless, and elderly people abandoned in nursing homes. They all just make me so angry I can't collect myself and have a rational discussion about them at all. Maybe it is just abandonment in general; the abandonment of the helpless by those who can help. I was so angry this summer taking care of what was obviously a housecat that had been abandoned by someone moving out of the neighborhood, and the other day I just cried when Sean and I passed a dog that had been hit near his house. The thought of someone losing their dog right before Christmas was entirely too much for my emotions. I made him drive another way back to my house. And it seems like every year we go to the beach, someone in a car behind us hits a little animal we specifically avoided- one year it was a baby raccoon, whose brother proceeded to try to wake it up in the most heartbreaking thing I've ever watched, and this summer it was a turtle. And I think about the turtle and raccoon ALL THE TIME. I'm a dweller, what can I say? I know everyone can't be like me- I'd rather cause a nine-car pileup than hit an animal- but people who are just like "eh, turtle" are not people I want to know. I hate those people. HATE them. I like to think I'm not a hateful person, but that does not apply in helpless-animal cases, nor for people who leave their parents in nursing homes and never visit them. My parents are NEVER going in a nursing home. Ever. I will apply that money towards a part-time nurse and take care of them myself, I don't care how draining it is.
So.
I don't know what brought that dream on- maybe it was watching everyone cry about the Bhutto assassination yesterday. It was definitely weird, because yesterday was great! It was my Dad's birthday, and he cooked lasagna from scratch and I made molten chocolate cakes. Meredith and Riley (who I LOVE) came over, and Sean finally got to meet him, and Sean was social and funny. Andra and I are playing Zelda's second quest, since my boss hasn't needed me for a while (although I worked on Wednesday, but I will not speak about that because my annoyance at the City of Atlanta for not updating their system since 1980 and for employing only completely incompetent people is profound). So hopefully this dream was a one-time occurrence, and I will now go snuggle my cat and pretend he is never going to die.
So.
I don't know what brought that dream on- maybe it was watching everyone cry about the Bhutto assassination yesterday. It was definitely weird, because yesterday was great! It was my Dad's birthday, and he cooked lasagna from scratch and I made molten chocolate cakes. Meredith and Riley (who I LOVE) came over, and Sean finally got to meet him, and Sean was social and funny. Andra and I are playing Zelda's second quest, since my boss hasn't needed me for a while (although I worked on Wednesday, but I will not speak about that because my annoyance at the City of Atlanta for not updating their system since 1980 and for employing only completely incompetent people is profound). So hopefully this dream was a one-time occurrence, and I will now go snuggle my cat and pretend he is never going to die.