[drabble] Koe
Title: Koe
Author:
kinjirarete
Fandom: Negima
Summary: No matter how loud she cried, she realized bitterly, she could never be heard.
Notes: Part one a series of drabbles centering certain Negima girls, the titles based on songs Amano Tsukiko.
She has always sat in that seat. Nicknamed among classmates, the "unsitable seat", she has sat in it every day since she enrolled in Mahora Gakuen.
She has always sat next to someone, though she has never been spoken to ever since "Then". She's always spoken to them, but they have never responded. Sometimes she got frustrated by this, but in the end, she always talked.
She thought it was funny because there was so many people around her every day, and yet, she was lonely.
Over the years, there has been at least one or two people that has noticed her existance. She could tell if somebody was looking through her or just right at her. The people who looked through her knew they were looking at somebody they knew. They had a usual expression they wore every day.
But the ones that saw her were totally different from the people who couldn't. When they saw her -- the person that nobody could see -- their expression changed. She could see suprise on their face: suprise that they just saw something that was never supposed to be there.
Often, that person just stared at her until somebody noticed them. Then they would ask if that person was okay. Now was the silent challenge she set up for that person: Would he or she tell them, or keep quiet? Often the first choice was chosen, and then the somebody would just look around and dismiss that their companion was crazy. The person who saw her would just shakily agree, and that would be the end. The challenge ended, and the person would never try to talk to her again, much less look at her.
If that person who saw her just responded a shaky "Nothing", then perhaps there was a chance. The challenge was still on, and her heart always lept. No matter how many let downs that person was, she always thought there was a chance.
Now, if that person actually approached her, she would think there would be a chance. A chance for friendship, she hoped. However, that hope was always crushed. The person would steal a last glance at her, and ignore her.
Soon, as she watched classes graduate and leave the class and be replaced by others, she started to give up hope. Slowly, she began to stop trying to make friends, to prompt people to see her. One day, when homeroom class was going on, she became so sick of everyone talking merrily to each other, she stood up from her seat and climbed onto the desk.
"Be quiet, all of you!" she shouted as loud as she could. "Be quiet, and stop talking! I'm telling you all! Shut your mouths!"
And yet, she couldn't be heard. She felt tears stinging her eyes, and then broke out into sobs only she could hear. If she wasn't crying into her hands, she would have noticed a person staring straight at her as she wept, but she didn't.
"Won't anybody notice me?" She choked out between sobs. "Nobody will dry my tears?"
Nobody responded.
There's a wall between me and the class. I can hear them, but they can't hear me. I can see them, but they can't see me.
No matter how loud she cried, she realized bitterly, she could never be heard.
"Sorry," she said quietly, wiping away tears full of frustration, lonliness, and sadness. "I'm sorry I interrupted the class with my crying." Slowly, she sat down in the "unsitable seat",
Of course, nobody but the other person heard her apologizing.
As the seasons passed, she was utterly convinced nobody would ever be her friend. Yet, she always kept in her feelings and smiled every day.
Her fate, however, changed for the better when the new teacher Negi Springfield began teaching 2-A for the first term in 2003...
Author:
kinjirarete
Fandom: Negima
Summary: No matter how loud she cried, she realized bitterly, she could never be heard.
Notes: Part one a series of drabbles centering certain Negima girls, the titles based on songs Amano Tsukiko.
She has always sat in that seat. Nicknamed among classmates, the "unsitable seat", she has sat in it every day since she enrolled in Mahora Gakuen.
She has always sat next to someone, though she has never been spoken to ever since "Then". She's always spoken to them, but they have never responded. Sometimes she got frustrated by this, but in the end, she always talked.
She thought it was funny because there was so many people around her every day, and yet, she was lonely.
Over the years, there has been at least one or two people that has noticed her existance. She could tell if somebody was looking through her or just right at her. The people who looked through her knew they were looking at somebody they knew. They had a usual expression they wore every day.
But the ones that saw her were totally different from the people who couldn't. When they saw her -- the person that nobody could see -- their expression changed. She could see suprise on their face: suprise that they just saw something that was never supposed to be there.
Often, that person just stared at her until somebody noticed them. Then they would ask if that person was okay. Now was the silent challenge she set up for that person: Would he or she tell them, or keep quiet? Often the first choice was chosen, and then the somebody would just look around and dismiss that their companion was crazy. The person who saw her would just shakily agree, and that would be the end. The challenge ended, and the person would never try to talk to her again, much less look at her.
If that person who saw her just responded a shaky "Nothing", then perhaps there was a chance. The challenge was still on, and her heart always lept. No matter how many let downs that person was, she always thought there was a chance.
Now, if that person actually approached her, she would think there would be a chance. A chance for friendship, she hoped. However, that hope was always crushed. The person would steal a last glance at her, and ignore her.
Soon, as she watched classes graduate and leave the class and be replaced by others, she started to give up hope. Slowly, she began to stop trying to make friends, to prompt people to see her. One day, when homeroom class was going on, she became so sick of everyone talking merrily to each other, she stood up from her seat and climbed onto the desk.
"Be quiet, all of you!" she shouted as loud as she could. "Be quiet, and stop talking! I'm telling you all! Shut your mouths!"
And yet, she couldn't be heard. She felt tears stinging her eyes, and then broke out into sobs only she could hear. If she wasn't crying into her hands, she would have noticed a person staring straight at her as she wept, but she didn't.
"Won't anybody notice me?" She choked out between sobs. "Nobody will dry my tears?"
Nobody responded.
There's a wall between me and the class. I can hear them, but they can't hear me. I can see them, but they can't see me.
No matter how loud she cried, she realized bitterly, she could never be heard.
"Sorry," she said quietly, wiping away tears full of frustration, lonliness, and sadness. "I'm sorry I interrupted the class with my crying." Slowly, she sat down in the "unsitable seat",
Of course, nobody but the other person heard her apologizing.
As the seasons passed, she was utterly convinced nobody would ever be her friend. Yet, she always kept in her feelings and smiled every day.
Her fate, however, changed for the better when the new teacher Negi Springfield began teaching 2-A for the first term in 2003...