Delving In The Darkness To Find A Quiet Place
This statement says so much of what is going on for me right now. There are some things that I really need to get a grip on and admit to myself; one, that the further down the spiral I go, quicker my mind and imagination flows, like flood gates opened and two, the longer I am left alone, to my own devices the more I strive to live and become motivated to chase my dreams. Granted there is always that time after a relationship where it becomes hard to deal with your current situation, but that time is now passing. I realize that I have been trying to trick myself with everyday that passes and every little step out of that mandatory depression that I was OK, that was just a lie, I haven't be okay for sometime, but I'm getting there.
I've been on an emotional roller coaster for a longtime now and I'm just stepping off for a little while. I've forced myself to not listen to those song that remind me of the past the haunts me and it's been go medicine to not purposely resurface those feelings that are tied with that somber music, very good medicine indeed. I've been listening to Paul Oakenfeld, Norma Jean, and the Gladiator OST a lot in the past couple of days and it's pretty up lifting. It sucks at the same time because I do love Katatonia so much, but everyone of their songs has some emotional attachment for me that just stirs up too many memories.
Now the "Find A Quiet Place", well this is the title I have given to the story I'm working on right now. The idea just came to me last night like a bull in a china shop, shattering my every thought and becoming the center of my every attention. This is the first time in a long time that I have had a "Eureka!!!" moment like this one where a story just starts to unfold in my thoughts; this also tells me that my mind is starting to become a lot less cluttered. So what is "Find A Quiet Place" is probably what you are thinking, it's a horror story, "gasp", surprised. It's been so very long since I worked on any of my stories and this new one I think will take precedence over anything else for a while. I've only had a maybe in whole an hour of thought into this one and my mind is racing with so much stuff that I haven't even had a chance to write the majority of it down. I think this one will be the "one", the first one I completely finish and the one that maybe I put out there to try to venture into making some kind of name for myself. The reason it's called "Find A Quiet Place" is because that's what the main character is trying to do when he finds something else, something ancient, horrible, and malevolent; this will be my first homage to Lovecrafts tales that have inspired so much in me.
So I guess there is no exact formula to work though any situation, I think maybe the term just roll with the punches would be better applied to how things have been going. I guess this weeks lesson was, at times you must take a step back to get a clear view of the future.
I've been on an emotional roller coaster for a longtime now and I'm just stepping off for a little while. I've forced myself to not listen to those song that remind me of the past the haunts me and it's been go medicine to not purposely resurface those feelings that are tied with that somber music, very good medicine indeed. I've been listening to Paul Oakenfeld, Norma Jean, and the Gladiator OST a lot in the past couple of days and it's pretty up lifting. It sucks at the same time because I do love Katatonia so much, but everyone of their songs has some emotional attachment for me that just stirs up too many memories.
Now the "Find A Quiet Place", well this is the title I have given to the story I'm working on right now. The idea just came to me last night like a bull in a china shop, shattering my every thought and becoming the center of my every attention. This is the first time in a long time that I have had a "Eureka!!!" moment like this one where a story just starts to unfold in my thoughts; this also tells me that my mind is starting to become a lot less cluttered. So what is "Find A Quiet Place" is probably what you are thinking, it's a horror story, "gasp", surprised. It's been so very long since I worked on any of my stories and this new one I think will take precedence over anything else for a while. I've only had a maybe in whole an hour of thought into this one and my mind is racing with so much stuff that I haven't even had a chance to write the majority of it down. I think this one will be the "one", the first one I completely finish and the one that maybe I put out there to try to venture into making some kind of name for myself. The reason it's called "Find A Quiet Place" is because that's what the main character is trying to do when he finds something else, something ancient, horrible, and malevolent; this will be my first homage to Lovecrafts tales that have inspired so much in me.
So I guess there is no exact formula to work though any situation, I think maybe the term just roll with the punches would be better applied to how things have been going. I guess this weeks lesson was, at times you must take a step back to get a clear view of the future.