♋ ACT V > GET CRABS.

[kinda_crabby]

[ Go to the store, he was told. Whatever, not as if he had anything better to do, right? Besides, this may be an opportunity to learn more about human society, which would be important considering he is stuck in one now. The human food market sure was big and confusing; seriously, how many different things do humans need to eat

Comments

[deaths_heritor]

[Oh, look. Somebody who looks vaguely similar to her 'daughter'. Susan peers into the pond as Karkat thrashes about and helpfully gives advice.]

Crustaceans are also salt water animals. Just thought I'd mention it.

[kinda_crabby]

FUCK YOU, FUCK ME, AND FUCK HUMAN CRUSTACEAN ANATOMY!

But they're not fish! They can handle this shit, right?!

[deaths_heritor]

That would certainly be an astonishing feat. No, they'll be dead in a short while, I think. Hopefully, the term 'death-grip' doesn't apply to lobsters.

[kinda_crabby]

No, no, no! You're just saying that to screw with me! They'll make it. C'mon, you little jerks, go eat some roe!

[realitywarping]

[...

Welp.

That's not something you see every day.]

[kinda_crabby]

[Just gonna be bolting right past you, Harley. Karkat's got some Serious Shit to get done here.

Also he can't really see anything with the lobsters obscuring his vision.]

[realitywarping]

[Just gonna follow him to the pond.]

Karkat?

[kinda_crabby]

JEGUS, WHAT IS IT, JADE.

I'M NOT SURE IF YOU NOTICED, BUT I'M PREOCCUPIED.

[backseat_dragon]

-This poor grocer with a pair of DRAGONS on his back feels like he should probably stop this kid from making a scene. Yes. They guy with the DRAGONS ON HIS BACK. Will attempt this.-

U-um... Sir? Could you get down, please?

[soexcitable]

[ HOLY COD CAN'T A GIRL SIT BY THE POND IN PEACE WITHOUT HAVING LOBSTERS DROPPED INTO IT? ....
Apparently not. She stares at Karkat a moment, then just giggles.]

You sure culled them!

[kinda_crabby]

Oh, great. I have only myself to blame for this, because where ELSE would you be? You'll never let me live this down.

[soexcitable]

[She leans so far over the pond that it looks like she could fall in any moment, but she somehow doesn't.]

What are you doing with all of these~?

[kinda_crabby]

I'm releasing these ungrateful little assholes into the wild for no reason whatsoever.

[furikazan]

[Bang was watching the entire thing. These thieves are getting younger and younger. Damn that form of media he is so conveniently selling right now! He tries to stop Karkat... the only way he knows now.]

STOP RIGHT THERE, CRAFTY CRUSTACEAN-NAPPER! YOU WILL NOT SUCCEED IN YOUR NEFARIOUS ACT OF LOBSTER LARCENY! THE DEFENDER OF LOVE, JUSTICE, AND DELICIOUS SEAFOOD, BANG SHISHIGAMI, WILL STOP YOU!

[He then decides to chase after Karkat in an attempt to apprehend him. Or at least give him a stern talking-to.]

[kinda_crabby]

GET OFF MY NOOK, YOU STUPID DOUCHEBAG. I'M NOT LETTING YOU EAT THESE GUYS.

[furikazan]

[Bang looks... kind of puzzled at this, actually. Why else would one want to steal a lobster? As confused as he is... HE MUST KEEP UP THE DEMEANOR!]

I COULD CARE LESS ABOUT WHAT YOU INTEND TO DO WITH THEM, BUT I CANNOT LET THE ACT OF THIEVERY COME TO PASS!

[A little late on that one, Bang. He just kind of stares for a bit at the lobsters giving Karkat the savage beatdown that he would have dispensed.]

YES, GO CRUSTACEANS! GO! SHOW THIS THIEF THE IRON CLAW OF JUSTICE! MAKE HIM REGRET THE DAY HE TRIED TO GET A FREE MEAL!

[kinda_crabby]

I'M NOT GOING TO EAT THEM, YOU DISGUSTING FUCKASS!