Bottoms Up
~850; pg-13; drabble
jongdae/yi fan
skyfall au
Jongdae wants to make today special.
When Yi Fan arrives at his desk Wednesday morning there is a cup of coffee sitting on his desk, still steaming through the slit in the lid. He brings the cup near his nose, but far enough to avoid inhaling anything toxic if that were the case, and takes a whiff.
Whiskey.
Some clever sod put whiskey in his coffee...but which clever sod could it be? It’s definitely not Lu Han since more often than not, Yi Fan gets him coffee instead. It can’t be Baekhyun because it’s his day off. Zi Tao is in Chile probably drinking whiskey.
Q.
That little shit. Yi Fan smiles beside himself and settles into his chair, feet propped up and enjoys his coffee before starting his dreaded mission paperwork. The life of a government agent may seem glamorous, and it is, but the paperwork is always a bitch to deal with and Yi Fan wasn’t able to sucker anyone into doing his reports this time around.
Sometime later after falling asleep on his keyboard, Yi Fan decides to take a stretch around headquarters. He bothers Kyungsoo (who points a heat laser extremely close to his face), Yi Xing (who politely tells him to fuck off in his sweet unassuming way), and Sehun (who is so clingy Yi Fan has to pry himself away) before casually “dropping by” Jongdae’s office because it was “on the way” back to his own desk (it’s not).
“Happy--!” the bespectacled young man stops moving screen with his fingers and smiles.
Yi Fan’s initial feigned nonchalance turns to surprise,“Don’t you dare finish that.”
“--birthday!” Jongdae finishes anyway. Yi Fan rolls his eyes and buttons up his coat, unsure of what to do now since his plan for small talk had completely gone out the window now that his age had been brought up. Yi Fan likes to forget that he’s attracted to a younger man that still misses spots on his jaw when he shaves, wears graphic t-shirts with cartoons Yi Fan has never even heard of (what the fuck are Teen Titans?), and fumbles with his own tie sometimes.
“I took the liberty of doing something special for you since you have to work on your birthday and I’m sure you’d rather be home drinking in the darkness of your living room or shagging some hot foreign beauty. You’re welcome.” Jongdae grins in his usual way, the way that makes it look like he’s part cat and a very cute cat at that.
“I make it a point to not celebrate this day, Q. How’d you even find out in the first place? M told me she erased it from the database years ago.” Jongdae looks at him with the same look he has whenever Yi Fan questions his skills and suddenly Yi Fan feels like he’s a rookie on the field again. Damnnit Jongdae.
“007, are you really asking me that question right now?” the agent coughs to hide his embarrassment and mutters a quiet “no”.
Jongdae grabs a tablet off a desk and flips the cover, “Look, I get it. You’re supposed to be this cool, chic, and mysterious government agent that everyone wants to figure out but also steer clear of because you have the personality of a cactus and an emotional range thats probably as wide as the visual color spectrum of a human. But I’m your Quartermaster. We’re supposed to be working as one lethal unit and if you can’t trust me even on an acquaintance level then we can’t be at our best. And it’s your birthday for god’s sake--at least drink until you can’t remember how many fingers you have on one hand.”
“That’s been the plan for past few decades.” Yi Fan bristles.
“Well then bottoms up.” Jongdae says and taps away at the tablet in his hands.
“Thanks for the coffee, Q.” Yi Fan says on his way out.
“You’re welcome.” Jongdae replies, eyes and fingers never leaving the screens.
Later that night, there’s a knock at the door and the only time anyone knocks on Yi Fan’s door is actually never. The landlord never bothers him, mostly because he’ll be ignored, and if anyone needs to see him they find their way into the apartment silently and wait for him. Yi Fan fishes out a handgun from the couch and approaches the door.
Instead of a burly Serbian mobster lackey, it’s a tiny man with tousled black hair, glasses, and a puffy green coat. “Jesus Christ.” Yi Fan curses, running a hand over his face and returns the gun to safety before unlocking the door.
“Wow, I didn’t actually think you drank yourself sick in the dark. It’s darker than I thought it would be.” Jongdae says, inviting himself and his puffy coat in. Yi Fan doesn’t retort, or rather, he can’t find the words to. “So since nobody likes to drink alone, I thought I would keep you company on this special day. I even brought alcohol. I hope you like scotch.”
“Glasses are in the cupboard,” Yi Fan sighs, “Happy birthday, you poor sod.”
A/N: Dedicated to the Sehun to my Jongin. The Jongdae to my Yi Fan. The Heechul to my Han Geng. The Jonghyun to my Key (wow our respective biases are actually our own otp's well done us). Happy birthday to my best beautiful and amazing and wonderful friend, eburnine It’s definitely not as much as I’d like but that’s all that I had time for since uni these days is kinda stressful but nevertheless, I hope you had an amazing day, love. You deserve nothing but the best. Yay you’re finally legal! Miss you lots<3
jongdae/yi fan
skyfall au
Jongdae wants to make today special.
When Yi Fan arrives at his desk Wednesday morning there is a cup of coffee sitting on his desk, still steaming through the slit in the lid. He brings the cup near his nose, but far enough to avoid inhaling anything toxic if that were the case, and takes a whiff.
Whiskey.
Some clever sod put whiskey in his coffee...but which clever sod could it be? It’s definitely not Lu Han since more often than not, Yi Fan gets him coffee instead. It can’t be Baekhyun because it’s his day off. Zi Tao is in Chile probably drinking whiskey.
Q.
That little shit. Yi Fan smiles beside himself and settles into his chair, feet propped up and enjoys his coffee before starting his dreaded mission paperwork. The life of a government agent may seem glamorous, and it is, but the paperwork is always a bitch to deal with and Yi Fan wasn’t able to sucker anyone into doing his reports this time around.
Sometime later after falling asleep on his keyboard, Yi Fan decides to take a stretch around headquarters. He bothers Kyungsoo (who points a heat laser extremely close to his face), Yi Xing (who politely tells him to fuck off in his sweet unassuming way), and Sehun (who is so clingy Yi Fan has to pry himself away) before casually “dropping by” Jongdae’s office because it was “on the way” back to his own desk (it’s not).
“Happy--!” the bespectacled young man stops moving screen with his fingers and smiles.
Yi Fan’s initial feigned nonchalance turns to surprise,“Don’t you dare finish that.”
“--birthday!” Jongdae finishes anyway. Yi Fan rolls his eyes and buttons up his coat, unsure of what to do now since his plan for small talk had completely gone out the window now that his age had been brought up. Yi Fan likes to forget that he’s attracted to a younger man that still misses spots on his jaw when he shaves, wears graphic t-shirts with cartoons Yi Fan has never even heard of (what the fuck are Teen Titans?), and fumbles with his own tie sometimes.
“I took the liberty of doing something special for you since you have to work on your birthday and I’m sure you’d rather be home drinking in the darkness of your living room or shagging some hot foreign beauty. You’re welcome.” Jongdae grins in his usual way, the way that makes it look like he’s part cat and a very cute cat at that.
“I make it a point to not celebrate this day, Q. How’d you even find out in the first place? M told me she erased it from the database years ago.” Jongdae looks at him with the same look he has whenever Yi Fan questions his skills and suddenly Yi Fan feels like he’s a rookie on the field again. Damnnit Jongdae.
“007, are you really asking me that question right now?” the agent coughs to hide his embarrassment and mutters a quiet “no”.
Jongdae grabs a tablet off a desk and flips the cover, “Look, I get it. You’re supposed to be this cool, chic, and mysterious government agent that everyone wants to figure out but also steer clear of because you have the personality of a cactus and an emotional range thats probably as wide as the visual color spectrum of a human. But I’m your Quartermaster. We’re supposed to be working as one lethal unit and if you can’t trust me even on an acquaintance level then we can’t be at our best. And it’s your birthday for god’s sake--at least drink until you can’t remember how many fingers you have on one hand.”
“That’s been the plan for past few decades.” Yi Fan bristles.
“Well then bottoms up.” Jongdae says and taps away at the tablet in his hands.
“Thanks for the coffee, Q.” Yi Fan says on his way out.
“You’re welcome.” Jongdae replies, eyes and fingers never leaving the screens.
Later that night, there’s a knock at the door and the only time anyone knocks on Yi Fan’s door is actually never. The landlord never bothers him, mostly because he’ll be ignored, and if anyone needs to see him they find their way into the apartment silently and wait for him. Yi Fan fishes out a handgun from the couch and approaches the door.
Instead of a burly Serbian mobster lackey, it’s a tiny man with tousled black hair, glasses, and a puffy green coat. “Jesus Christ.” Yi Fan curses, running a hand over his face and returns the gun to safety before unlocking the door.
“Wow, I didn’t actually think you drank yourself sick in the dark. It’s darker than I thought it would be.” Jongdae says, inviting himself and his puffy coat in. Yi Fan doesn’t retort, or rather, he can’t find the words to. “So since nobody likes to drink alone, I thought I would keep you company on this special day. I even brought alcohol. I hope you like scotch.”
“Glasses are in the cupboard,” Yi Fan sighs, “Happy birthday, you poor sod.”
A/N: Dedicated to the Sehun to my Jongin. The Jongdae to my Yi Fan. The Heechul to my Han Geng. The Jonghyun to my Key (wow our respective biases are actually our own otp's well done us). Happy birthday to my best beautiful and amazing and wonderful friend, eburnine It’s definitely not as much as I’d like but that’s all that I had time for since uni these days is kinda stressful but nevertheless, I hope you had an amazing day, love. You deserve nothing but the best. Yay you’re finally legal! Miss you lots<3