empty plate
For years, I have placed, replaced, balanced, scooted around, pushed off, pulled on, things, tasks, roles, on to and off of my plate. that sentence was purposefully made to be awkward.
Thursday, I was placed on sabbatical. Tonight, I received notification that I am done with my MBA. I have no significant other, the kids have no school for the next two days, the bills are paid and the laundry is done. My mom has moved out, my lines are clear..... I have nothing. to. do.
what this means to me is ridiculous.
For the first time in as long as I can remember, tomorrow is a day off. a real day off. nothing, I really have nothing to do. and Tuesday and ....... forever.
after years of balancing and rebalancing, tomorrow morning I wake up with a completely clear plate.
empty.
I have two distinct feelings about this:
I have gratitude for the amazing opportunity that this is. I am also amazingly frightened.
Since I first got a job, I've always balanced work and school or work and more work, or raising kids and work, or raising kids and work and school. and more. this is honestly the first time in 20 years that I will have only one priority: running my house and raising my children.
more tomorrow I'm sure. for now, we eat fish sticks.