Definitely been a while.
I haven't updated this thing in forever. Oh well.
So here I am, the day after my 20th birthday. I'm 20. I'm not a teenager anymore and that totally freaks me out. I don't feel old enough to be 20.
I look at my life and I sometimes worry about it. I'll be graduating college in December with a liberal arts degree. I still have no idea what I want to do with my life and I'm beginning to think I'll never figure it out. I have no idea what I'm going to do after I graduate. No idea at all.
I still live with my parents. I know that's not unusal for a 20 year old, but still...I don't see myself moving out anytime soon. I'm such a home body. I like living here. I don't even have enough money to move out if I wanted to. I'm also afraid to leave because if I leave I think mom's going to leave and then dad would be here alone. I honestly don't think dad could handle that. I hate that that's holding me back, but it is.
I'm beginning to think I'm never going have a boyfriend again. I feel so lame, seriously, I'd love to just have someone who cares about me, someone to hang out with like that. I just haven't met anyone and I'm scared that I never will.
I need to get out more, but it's hard when all of my best friends live in different states.
Talia and I have talked about me moving to Michigan. I've thought about it a lot. But again, it's the leaving home thing. I just don't know if I could be that far away from my family. Plus I'm scared to fly and that's a long drive. I wish she lived closer.
I feel like I need to just do something big in my life, get myself out there. I don't know what to do. I just know this isn't where I thought I'd see myself when I was 20 years old.
But anyway. Blah.
So here I am, the day after my 20th birthday. I'm 20. I'm not a teenager anymore and that totally freaks me out. I don't feel old enough to be 20.
I look at my life and I sometimes worry about it. I'll be graduating college in December with a liberal arts degree. I still have no idea what I want to do with my life and I'm beginning to think I'll never figure it out. I have no idea what I'm going to do after I graduate. No idea at all.
I still live with my parents. I know that's not unusal for a 20 year old, but still...I don't see myself moving out anytime soon. I'm such a home body. I like living here. I don't even have enough money to move out if I wanted to. I'm also afraid to leave because if I leave I think mom's going to leave and then dad would be here alone. I honestly don't think dad could handle that. I hate that that's holding me back, but it is.
I'm beginning to think I'm never going have a boyfriend again. I feel so lame, seriously, I'd love to just have someone who cares about me, someone to hang out with like that. I just haven't met anyone and I'm scared that I never will.
I need to get out more, but it's hard when all of my best friends live in different states.
Talia and I have talked about me moving to Michigan. I've thought about it a lot. But again, it's the leaving home thing. I just don't know if I could be that far away from my family. Plus I'm scared to fly and that's a long drive. I wish she lived closer.
I feel like I need to just do something big in my life, get myself out there. I don't know what to do. I just know this isn't where I thought I'd see myself when I was 20 years old.
But anyway. Blah.