Mokgeoli (Necklace) Chapter 12
Chapter 12
Title: Mokgeoli (Necklace)
Author: kimheechulmiki
Genre: angst
Pairing: JunSu & YooChun
Rating: G
Disclaimer: Don’t own them.
Summary: 3 years later YooChun still wears the necklace…
JunSu emerged from his room in a pair of loose track bottoms and a long sleeve t shirt. He scanned the living room searching for YooChun. Part of him wished for him to be gone, the other that he’d stayed.
“Looking for me?” JunSu jumped as YooChun appeared from behind him bearing a big plate of freshly cooked spicy rice cakes. “Come on, let’s eat. I’m hungry.” YooChun had began cooking the moment JunSu entered the bathroom, a quick inspection of the freezer told him that JunSu had ate the dishes he had painstakingly cooked and froze for him.
A loud rumbling of his tummy made JunSu blushed as he mumbled something that sounded like “Not hungry.”
15 minutes later, the plate was empty. YooChun hid his grin in the napkin as he wiped his lips. “I missed you.” At JunSu questioning look YooChun went on. “Earlier, you asked me what I‘m doing here.”
JunSu said nothing, but reached for his ringing phone. He knew by the ringtone, it was Jae Joong hyeong. Ignoring it he slipped the phone under some cushions.
“You’re not picking it up?” YooChun carefully balanced the plate and the chopsticks as he carried them to the kitchen.
JunSu just scowled at him.
“He just worries about you, you know.” YooChun voice drifted from the kitchen as he washed up. He guessed the caller was Jae Joong. Not many people had JunSu’s number anyway.
“He doesn’t have to. I’m not a child.” JunSu finally spoke up.
“He’s your hyeong, of course he does.” YooChun wiped his damp hands and made his way back to the living room. He saw JunSu flipping the TV channels ignoring him.
Sighing YooChun sat down next to JunSu. He knew without looking that act would earn him a death stare from JunSu. But he chose to ignore it, and made himself comfortable.
“Why were you crying? Miss me that much?”YooChun teased.
“I wasn’t!” JunSu denied hotly.
“Uh huh.” YooChun nodded. “You also called out Jae Joong hyeong’s name, as well as your abeoji.”
“Shut the fuck up!” JunSu clamped his hand over YooChun’s mouth.
YooChun shook his head, as he peeled JunSu’s fingers away. “I know about the abuse.”
For a second, JunSu looked at him in disbelief and was about to deny it as well, when he knew it was pointless. Jae Joong hyeong must have told YooChun. “Did he tell the entire school as well?” JunSu’s voice filled with anger.
“No, just the two of his best friends.”YooChun placed a hand on JunSu’s shoulder, it was quickly shrugged off. “He suffered too, JunSu. Perhaps not as much as you, but he did.”
“I thought you were a dentist. When did you change profession, YooChun?” JunSu gave a cynical dry chuckle.
YooChun didn’t have to be one to know JunSu was using his brave front as a shield, a protection against his fragile self. He was just a badly scarred person, scared to get hurt if he revealed too much about himself. “What your abeoji did to you is unforgivable. But don’t shut out others, people who care and love you.”
“Oh and who might these people be?” JunSu stood up and folded his arms across his chest.
“Me, for one. Your hyeong, Jae Joong…” Yoochun’s tone was low and soft.
JunSu snorted as he laughed again. “Just leave me alone okay? Go home!”
“I’m not leaving, I can’t. You need to talk about this.” YooChun turned to face Junsu who stood by the window. “It isn’t healthy to bottle it up. Having these nightmares…”
For the second time that evening JunSu interrupted him. “Just leave me alone Park YooChun!”
For the second time that evening Jae Joong called JunSu.
“Why can’t everyone, just leave me alone?!” JunSu picked up his phone and threw it across the room. His phone shattered, broken to pieces.
“JunSu…” YooChun watched alarmingly at JunSu display of anger, he decided enough is enough. He walked over to JunSu and hugged the angry man from behind.
“Take your hands off me!” JunSu struggled and shouted. “Let me go!”
YooChun hung on tightly and closed his eyes. He only opened them when he felt JunSu’s struggles ceased and sobs.
Worn out, both men stumbled and fell onto the sofa. YooChun shifted slightly but still kept his arms around JunSu. He saw JunSu had both hands over his face, and his shoulders were shaking as he cried.
YooChun waited until the cries died down and JunSu lowered his hands before offering his handkerchief.
“Please let me go.” JunSu weakly whispered. Some tear drops clung to his lowered lashes.
“I can’t JunSu, you know I can’t. “ YooChun knew that JunSu just didn’t mean it from the physical point of view. “I’m madly in love with you. I can’t, don’t ask me to.”
“You love me?” The retort came after a few minutes of silent. JunSu now faced YooChun. “You wouldn’t if you knew…”
“I know about the beatings, and I don’t care.” YooChun cupped JunSu chin forcing the younger man to look at him.
“Ahh…the beatings.” JunSu sighed. “Do you know why he beat me?”
YooChun silently shook his head, Jae Joong didn’t either. He just thought his abeoji lost his mind.
“It all began so suddenly, one day he just decided that it was a good day to beat JunSu to a pulp.” JunSu cynical laughter chilled YooChun’s ears.
“I took it as perhaps I disobeyed him or I did something wrong, it’s my fault.” JunSu pushed himself off YooChun’s lap, but YooChun held on firm. “I was just happy that Jae Joong hyeong was spared. I don’t think he could bear or stand the pain.”
“One day.” JunSu sighed as he finally met YooChun’s concerned gaze. “One day, he finally told me why.”
“Why?” YooChun prompted after JunSu remained quiet.
“My mother had an affair with my uncle. I am the product of the affair.” JunSu grimly related the facts to YooChun, something he had never repeated to anyone. A secret he kept, even from Jae Joong all these years. “Apparently, my mother tricked abeoji into believing I’m his. So when he found out…”
“You, the innocent child became his punching bag?” YooChun couldn’t disguise the disgust in his voice.
“Yeah. I never told anyone. I don’t think Jae Joong hyeong knows.” JunSu rubbed the back of his neck. “Jae Joong hyeong once tried to save me, but he ended up getting punished as well. So I didn’t want to involve him in any way.”
“You must have been shocked learning the reason.” YooChun gently stroked JunSu’s still damp hair. “Why didn’t…”
“Tell anyone?” JunSu shot back. “The world I knew, people who I thought I loved and cared for all my life suddenly just left and abandoned me. Our mother left us, you know.” He pushed away from YooChun’s touch.
“Do you still love me?” JunSu asked in a mocking tone.
“I love you very much.” YooChun plainly stated.
Junsu just smirked.
“Is that why you refuse to open up to me?” YooChun suddenly understood JunSu’s reluctance.
End of chapter 12
Title: Mokgeoli (Necklace)
Author: kimheechulmiki
Genre: angst
Pairing: JunSu & YooChun
Rating: G
Disclaimer: Don’t own them.
Summary: 3 years later YooChun still wears the necklace…
JunSu emerged from his room in a pair of loose track bottoms and a long sleeve t shirt. He scanned the living room searching for YooChun. Part of him wished for him to be gone, the other that he’d stayed.
“Looking for me?” JunSu jumped as YooChun appeared from behind him bearing a big plate of freshly cooked spicy rice cakes. “Come on, let’s eat. I’m hungry.” YooChun had began cooking the moment JunSu entered the bathroom, a quick inspection of the freezer told him that JunSu had ate the dishes he had painstakingly cooked and froze for him.
A loud rumbling of his tummy made JunSu blushed as he mumbled something that sounded like “Not hungry.”
15 minutes later, the plate was empty. YooChun hid his grin in the napkin as he wiped his lips. “I missed you.” At JunSu questioning look YooChun went on. “Earlier, you asked me what I‘m doing here.”
JunSu said nothing, but reached for his ringing phone. He knew by the ringtone, it was Jae Joong hyeong. Ignoring it he slipped the phone under some cushions.
“You’re not picking it up?” YooChun carefully balanced the plate and the chopsticks as he carried them to the kitchen.
JunSu just scowled at him.
“He just worries about you, you know.” YooChun voice drifted from the kitchen as he washed up. He guessed the caller was Jae Joong. Not many people had JunSu’s number anyway.
“He doesn’t have to. I’m not a child.” JunSu finally spoke up.
“He’s your hyeong, of course he does.” YooChun wiped his damp hands and made his way back to the living room. He saw JunSu flipping the TV channels ignoring him.
Sighing YooChun sat down next to JunSu. He knew without looking that act would earn him a death stare from JunSu. But he chose to ignore it, and made himself comfortable.
“Why were you crying? Miss me that much?”YooChun teased.
“I wasn’t!” JunSu denied hotly.
“Uh huh.” YooChun nodded. “You also called out Jae Joong hyeong’s name, as well as your abeoji.”
“Shut the fuck up!” JunSu clamped his hand over YooChun’s mouth.
YooChun shook his head, as he peeled JunSu’s fingers away. “I know about the abuse.”
For a second, JunSu looked at him in disbelief and was about to deny it as well, when he knew it was pointless. Jae Joong hyeong must have told YooChun. “Did he tell the entire school as well?” JunSu’s voice filled with anger.
“No, just the two of his best friends.”YooChun placed a hand on JunSu’s shoulder, it was quickly shrugged off. “He suffered too, JunSu. Perhaps not as much as you, but he did.”
“I thought you were a dentist. When did you change profession, YooChun?” JunSu gave a cynical dry chuckle.
YooChun didn’t have to be one to know JunSu was using his brave front as a shield, a protection against his fragile self. He was just a badly scarred person, scared to get hurt if he revealed too much about himself. “What your abeoji did to you is unforgivable. But don’t shut out others, people who care and love you.”
“Oh and who might these people be?” JunSu stood up and folded his arms across his chest.
“Me, for one. Your hyeong, Jae Joong…” Yoochun’s tone was low and soft.
JunSu snorted as he laughed again. “Just leave me alone okay? Go home!”
“I’m not leaving, I can’t. You need to talk about this.” YooChun turned to face Junsu who stood by the window. “It isn’t healthy to bottle it up. Having these nightmares…”
For the second time that evening JunSu interrupted him. “Just leave me alone Park YooChun!”
For the second time that evening Jae Joong called JunSu.
“Why can’t everyone, just leave me alone?!” JunSu picked up his phone and threw it across the room. His phone shattered, broken to pieces.
“JunSu…” YooChun watched alarmingly at JunSu display of anger, he decided enough is enough. He walked over to JunSu and hugged the angry man from behind.
“Take your hands off me!” JunSu struggled and shouted. “Let me go!”
YooChun hung on tightly and closed his eyes. He only opened them when he felt JunSu’s struggles ceased and sobs.
Worn out, both men stumbled and fell onto the sofa. YooChun shifted slightly but still kept his arms around JunSu. He saw JunSu had both hands over his face, and his shoulders were shaking as he cried.
YooChun waited until the cries died down and JunSu lowered his hands before offering his handkerchief.
“Please let me go.” JunSu weakly whispered. Some tear drops clung to his lowered lashes.
“I can’t JunSu, you know I can’t. “ YooChun knew that JunSu just didn’t mean it from the physical point of view. “I’m madly in love with you. I can’t, don’t ask me to.”
“You love me?” The retort came after a few minutes of silent. JunSu now faced YooChun. “You wouldn’t if you knew…”
“I know about the beatings, and I don’t care.” YooChun cupped JunSu chin forcing the younger man to look at him.
“Ahh…the beatings.” JunSu sighed. “Do you know why he beat me?”
YooChun silently shook his head, Jae Joong didn’t either. He just thought his abeoji lost his mind.
“It all began so suddenly, one day he just decided that it was a good day to beat JunSu to a pulp.” JunSu cynical laughter chilled YooChun’s ears.
“I took it as perhaps I disobeyed him or I did something wrong, it’s my fault.” JunSu pushed himself off YooChun’s lap, but YooChun held on firm. “I was just happy that Jae Joong hyeong was spared. I don’t think he could bear or stand the pain.”
“One day.” JunSu sighed as he finally met YooChun’s concerned gaze. “One day, he finally told me why.”
“Why?” YooChun prompted after JunSu remained quiet.
“My mother had an affair with my uncle. I am the product of the affair.” JunSu grimly related the facts to YooChun, something he had never repeated to anyone. A secret he kept, even from Jae Joong all these years. “Apparently, my mother tricked abeoji into believing I’m his. So when he found out…”
“You, the innocent child became his punching bag?” YooChun couldn’t disguise the disgust in his voice.
“Yeah. I never told anyone. I don’t think Jae Joong hyeong knows.” JunSu rubbed the back of his neck. “Jae Joong hyeong once tried to save me, but he ended up getting punished as well. So I didn’t want to involve him in any way.”
“You must have been shocked learning the reason.” YooChun gently stroked JunSu’s still damp hair. “Why didn’t…”
“Tell anyone?” JunSu shot back. “The world I knew, people who I thought I loved and cared for all my life suddenly just left and abandoned me. Our mother left us, you know.” He pushed away from YooChun’s touch.
“Do you still love me?” JunSu asked in a mocking tone.
“I love you very much.” YooChun plainly stated.
Junsu just smirked.
“Is that why you refuse to open up to me?” YooChun suddenly understood JunSu’s reluctance.
End of chapter 12