matchmaker, matchmaker [chiinen/fukuda]
a fukuchii fanfic for sachi.
(featuring, airi/yuuto, chiinen/berryz, chiinen/umika, kanon/kento & others)“Airi-senpai, I appreciate the thought, but not everyone wants to date a Johnny, and not every Johnny is like Nakajima-san,” a small, petite girl deadpanned, bangs grazing her eyes as she picked at the strawberry shortcake set in front of her with a fork. Kanon missed her long hair and grimaced at the thought, trying very hard to ignore the senpai sitting in front of her, who looked irritated.
Suzuki Airi, ever lovely and ever…uhm, Airi-like, for lack of a better word at the moment, made a very un-idol-like face for a moment (looking very much like something out of a horror movie), before reverting back to sweet, lovely, and very Airi-like. “It wouldn’t hurt, Fuku-chan! I’m sure the guys Yuuto will set you up with are excellent people. I mean, you’ve had a crush on Yamada-kun forever, right?”
At this, the girl blushed, mumbled something incoherent, and began fiddling with her hair, licking her chapped lips. Then, quite literally, she jumped out of her seat as her phone buzzed, toppling over as she resisted the urge to strangle the electronic device (and along with it, Dawa). “I-I’ll do it!” the girl squeaked from under the table.
Airi smirked, letting out a soft laugh that might or might not have been threatening.
How scary.
-
“Yuuto, I refuse. You may have the most adorable girlfriend in the history of ever who isn’t me and also happens to be apart of Hello! Project, but I won’t be usurped as the cutest by some demonic female wearing frills and tutus and god-knows-what,” the5”1 resident acrobat of JUMP pouted, his lips pressing together in a fine line that clearly indicated to everyone else in the room that The Chiinen Yuuri was, in fact, not pleased.
No, not pleased at all.
Pulling on the costume they were assigned to wear for Music Station, Yuuto sighed, massaging his temples and generally looking like some distressed mother of a 40 year old hikikomori. Chiinen, on the other hand, had already lost interest, instead messing with the end of his tie, biting the corner of his lower lip. Sighing, Yuuto placed two hands on the short boy’s shoulders and stated, completely serious, “Airi knows Beckii Cruel.”
Chiinen, who was currently suffering what was known as ‘Tegoshi-syndrome’, had a weakness for foreigners. (But quite sadly, untalented foreigners, I mean, why couldn’t he have picked some like, I don’t know, Leah Dizon?) Especially that one. Yuuto knew that fact well. He spluttered and choked with eyes wide and surprised before gasping, “I’ll do it!”
The tall boy grinned, eyes glittering with something between malice and joy.
Man, they have got to be the evilest boyfriend-girlfriend pair in existence. They’ll probably murder you in your sleep while looking all perfect and beautiful.
-
Chiinen’s 001 Date
Pushing open the café door and shuffling over to the table Yuuto had instructed him to go to, he was met by the sight of a pretty-faced girl with what seemed to be a little too much mascara/eyeliner on. “Hi, I’m guessing you’re Risako-chan?” as he said this, he slipped into the seat across from her, chanting the mantra of, ‘I’ll endure, I’ll endure,’ over and over again in his head.
The girl looked up, face as perfectly blank as a fresh sheet of sketching paper, and said, “You’re not Yamada-san. I don’t date short people. Sit down.” He stiffened. The tone of her voice wasn’t asking him anything, wasn’t obliging, wasn’t sweet and cute, it was the sort of voice you found on a mafia boss: Do whatever the hell I say or I will cut you.
As she-Sugaya-sama, she told Chiinen to address her as-stirred her coffee, the boy swallowed nervously, not sure if he should say something or crawl into a hole to die. The mandatory hour passed without significant events occurring, unless you counted Chiinen almost wetting his pants out of fear a significant event. Right as the clock hit two she stood up, proceeded to glare at some imaginary spot behind his head, then whipped out her cellphone and began to text angrily.
The last thing Chiinen remembered was a death glare and fainting.
-
Kanon’s 001 Date
“Ice cream, every girl likes ice cream, right?” this boy, Nakajima Kento, said bright and loud, his hand comfortably on top of hers and holding on softly. They turned the corner, her pink skirt making a swish, swish as she walked and his jacket around her shoulders, ocean breeze sending her hair flying. It wasn’t what Kanon had at all expected, but everything had a strange sense of…accomplishment, like this was how it should be.
A strawberry ice cream cone in one hand and a vanilla one in the other, Kento grinned, handing it over to her. Just as she was about to accept, something, or rather, someone, leapt and pinned her date to the ground, effectively achieving the illusion that he had just been mauled by some sort of mountain lion or maybe Cthulhu. In a typical Hello! Project idol manner, Kanon did what was the next logical step: squeal like the helpless girl she was.
With the full force of a bullet-train on crack, Kikuchi Fuuma tackled his fellow band mate on a date, squealing the phrase, “Kento has a girlfriend!” in rapid succession so it sounded more like animalistic warm cries. Hokuto, probably slightly saner than Fuuma, promptly began to hit on Kanon and Yuugo laughed in a corner. Shifting her gaze between her date’s band members and said person himself, Kanon’s eyes grew large and Kento looked like he was embarrassed enough to cry.
It took a sobbing Kanon (out of fear because Hokuto was seriously creeping her out), intervention from Keito on speed-dial, two ropes and a paperclip later to pry Fuuma away from Kento, and keep him from glomping Kanon and gasping about how he would love to have her as a daughter-in-law. Yes, I don’t get it either.
Kento never did call. (He was too mortified by the incident, and by the weeks after where everyone else made reference to his ‘girlfriend’ almost constantly.)
-
Chiinen’s 005 Date
Sugaya Risako scared him. Period. There wasn’t anything else to add to that. Kumai Yurina was too gigantic and it was like Love Complex (even though she was kind of nice, the height difference made him cringe and not call her back). Okai Chisato didn’t even show up-okay, she did have the flu and canceled but she didn’t show up, and that was the end of that. Tsugunaga Momoko, however cute and adorable she was, scared him in a completely different way from Risako. It almost was like she was possessed by the devil or something.
The girl sitting in front of him pulled the cap over her eyes nervously, shrinking into her seat as though she wanted badly to just disappear. He laughed to try to ease the tension, but this only caused her to shrink even more, eyes lowered so she didn’t have to look at him. “Uhm…Umika-chan, I didn’t know you knew Airi-chan,” he mumbled quietly, taking a sip out of his iced tea.
She looked up at him for a second, smiling weakly. “I’m in 9nine, we’ve crossed paths and Nakajima-kun asked me to come today. Would it be alright if I left a little early? I have a photo shoot in twenty minutes.” She looked down at her cake and looked back up. “It’s not that I don’t like you, Chiinen-kun, it’s just a little…awkward…with, you know, everything that happened last year. Sorry, ne?”
Placing the glass down, Chiinen nodded robotically, smiling in return. “No problem, I’ll see you at school, then?” The ice in his glass clinked once as Umika put her things back into her bag, waving a goodbye. On the other hand, Chiinen put on an expression of self-pity, and wondering in the back of his mind when he would meet Beckii Cruel.
Umika nodded her head, slinging her bag over her shoulder. The speed which she bolted out of the place probably broke some kind of record.
-
Kanon’s 017 Date
Yuuto ran out of breathing people who wanted to go out on a blind date. (Most people in JUMP had a girlfriend/person they were interested in, the Juniors were all still in the belief that Kanon was Kento’s girlfriend, and his classmates tried to charm her but failed horrendously.) Akanishi Jin agreed in order to repay a debt he had. Airi didn’t even let them out the door, screaming bloody murder.
Things didn’t end too well. Let’s just say, a lot of blood, sweat, and glitter was involved.
I don’t think I need to delve any further than that.
-
“Last one, Yuuto. I don’t even care if Beckii Cruel comes after her. I don’t even care if it is Beckii Cruel.”
“Fine, Chiinen. I think you’ll like her though, this one, I have a feeling.”
“Airi-senpai, I don’t think I can do this anymore. Last person I’m going to see, alright?”
“Don’t think like that, Fuku-chan! Actually, I think this person’s perfect for you.”
Chiinen sat down at the same café he had met/was told to meet all his previous 32 dates, the waitress bringing him a glass of iced tea without saying much to him having his face glued to the table. A minute, five, ten…was she coming? Was he free to leave? The sound of a purse being set down onto the table almost made him look up, but he kept his head down.
There was a silence between them, thick and heavy, but, dare he say it, comfortable. “…Hi,” the person whispered meekly, and he could feel her slide into the seat across from him, telling the waitress in hushed tones that she wanted strawberry shortcake and just water, thank you. “Airi-senpai didn’t tell me your name.” Shifting only slightly, he frowned at the table. Yuuto didn’t tell him her name either.
The waitress came to set down what she had ordered, and Chiinen lifted his head slightly, to be greeted by a girl he’d seen only once before at the °C-ute concert he’d been forced to go to by Yuuto so many months before. “Hi,” he stated slow and careful, sitting up straight. On the other hand, the girl looked a little bewildered, surprised even, though she broke into a smile.
The smile was given back to her and he let it reach his eyes. Her hair was shorter than he had remembered it to be, but it suited her. “Hi, my name is Fukuda Kanon. I hope to get along with you.”
“Chiinen Yuuri, likewise,” soon after he spoke, the silence settled once again, but there wasn’t a need for words. Not this time.
-
“Didn’t I tell you to pair Chiinen-san and Fuku-chan together in the first place? You made me lie to Fuku-chan,” Airi murmured, arm hooked around her boyfriend’s and face scrunched up like a housewife telling her husband something he should have known but was too stubborn to admit he was wrong.
He shifted uncomfortably, eyes darting around before letting out a breath he might have been holding since the beginning of time, and smiled in defeat. “But you have to admit, it’s like narcissism or something, seeing them date each other.”
Airi rolled her eyes, releasing her hold on Yuuto and punching his shoulder lightly. “Some fans think we look like twins, should we stop dating?”
That night, Yuuto failed to get some.
Author’s Note:
:D I fail at fluff!
This is so late but I wrote it without contracting diabetes, I’m proud of myself.
Please don’t kill me for killing your ship Sachi orz.
Clearly, Risako is under some delusion that Ryosuke is very tall.
disclaimer: this is purely fictional. any coincidences with things in real life, dead or alive, coincidental or not, are for fictional purposes only.
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