(meme) 20 Answers (you never asked for)
On LJ users
I respect the right of every user to choose whatever layout they fancy, but I hate when people opt for black/dark background and white font color. The writers, I mean. I know it’s a matter of taste, but it hurts my eyes. And yes, I can use the ?style=mine thing, but the very necessity to do it annoys me, and I’ve noticed that I only do that for the authors I know and love. If the author is unknown to me, I tend to just close the story and never go back to it again.
Same happens, BTW, with layouts that have the text in a narrow column. Seriously, this isn’t twitter. Why subject people to this? I don’t get it.
Another thing, lj-cut. I had to cut some friends just because they’d never use it like it hurts them or something. Huge blocks of text are annoying enough when I’m at home, but when I read off my mobile screen? They’re way beyond that.
On kinks (not really)
Noticed an interesting thing. I like an element of jealousy here and there, but not if it’s followed through. Like, if person A flirts with person C and person B is jealous, it’s fine, but if A actually sleeps with C, I tend to get upset. Illogical, I know, just noticed this about myself. There’s a very popular and famous ST AU where, after Jim and Spock get together, Jim has to leave, and since it’s sort of an end of the relationship (or seems like it at the time), he gets together with other people because sex is nice and all that. It doesn’t constitute cheating, but I remember feeling very upset when I reached that point of the storyline, and, after that, the renewed romance tasted a bit off to me. *shrugs* I’m not saying it’s unrealistic or OOC or has no right to be. Just one of my kinks/anti-kinks I guess.
On sex scenes
I read so many fics, it’s probably alarming. Good ones, too, there are a lot of really, really good authors in the fandoms I’m in. Still. Every time a character says ‘I want you to fuck me’ or ‘I need you inside me’ or something to similar effect, the vocabulary of the next paragraph could be predicted down to a word. Someone will always be ‘rummaging’ around something (most likely the nightstand) for lube and/or condoms. It’s almost never any other word, not ‘searching’ or ‘looking’ or anything else, mostly it’s rummaging. Magic word. I did that, too, seems like we all do it, but it is pretty amusing.
On character descriptions
I’ve been reading a lot of Merlin fics lately, reaching the point where I thought that if I come across the expression ‘a mop of black hair’ one more time I’d scream. I’m not seriously criticizing now, but this is what happens when you read fics in the same fandom one after another. I lost count how many authors used that ‘mop of black hair’ when describing Merlin. I began to wonder if there was some kind of fandom memo about that, making the use of this expression mandatory or something. :)
Just as Castiel always has ‘the bluest eyes anyone’s ever seen.’ They are always so blue it’s unnatural. No, no, don’t get me wrong, I’m right there with you, but it’s a little bit funny.
I mean, in most stories we write, we have to make a character introduction even if we all know already what the character in question looks like. And there are of course, only so many ways to describe the same features. Still, amusing, that.
On sex scenes (again)
There’s a popular opinion that fanfiction exists for pr0n. Lately, I find myself scrolling through sex scenes a lot. They just fail to catch my attention. If there’s no underlying emotion, no background churning of feelings, or something beneath it, the descriptions tend to get repetitive and boring. Seriously, I used to think one couldn’t possibly get bored reading smut. Yep, one could. If the setting is off, if characterizations are bad, if I realize that, instead of ‘Dean and Cas’ or ‘Jim and Spock’ I can put any other two names - any other - into the scene and nothing will change, it’s a huge turn off. Like, what’s the point? When you’ve read your 50th description of a blowjob, you really don’t care all that much about the mechanics, even assuming you once had. There has to be something else, something more. Which, thank you, Pinto fandom and your queens of pr0n. You always do it, ladies, I don’t know how, but even with your PWPs, you always deliver. Kudos.
On life
You know, when you’re a child, and you do something wrong, there’s this feeling of guilt that you absolutely can’t withstand? Like you ate sweets before dinner or something, or lied, and your Mom is looking at you all disappointed, and refuses to speak to you. And you can’t stand it, you mope around, feeling worse and worse, until finally you say ‘sorry, I’ll never do that again, I’m so sorry’ and hear ‘I forgive you’ in return. There’s this feeling of grief and weight, a physical one, being lifted off your shoulders at that moment. It doesn’t go away. When we grow up, we say that ‘it’s complicated’ and go with that notion, but it’s the same story, really. We never grow out of the need to be forgiven when we screwed up. We just lie to ourselves that we have, or that ‘it’s no big deal, really,’ or that simply saying ‘sorry’ doesn’t change anything. It does. Maybe not as simple as that, but yeah, it matters.
On fandoms
God, I’m such a slasher it’s not even funny. I think the last het pairing I shipped was Mulder/Scully. Which makes it so frustrating when your pairing of choice has all the chemistry in the world and yet will always remain bromance at best. Because the show is supposed to be family friendly, or is too mainstream for gay, or - I don’t even know. It’s sad. It’s annoying when show producers make the protagonist sleep with the first convenient woman, no matter how OOC or out of the blue it will seem, just to underline that he’s not gay. I mean, sure, there’s Torchwood (gotta love the Brits), and there’s Queer as Folk, but still, it’s somehow so not satisfying.
On life (again)
My parents think that being gay is unnatural. Literally against nature. I never realized how much it would hurt me to hear them say that. They are highly intelligent, educated people. These are their sincere convictions. Knowing that is painful to me beyond what I can tell.
On fanfiction
I like romance. Hell, I love romance. But when I read something along the lines of ‘they met, they liked each other, they went out, liked each other more, moved together, and lived happily ever after’ it’s disappointing. Stories like that are sweet and lovely, but, to me, they are about nothing. If there isn’t some plot, or intrigue, or mystery, or misunderstanding - or something - it’s just romance for the sake of romance, I can’t get invested in a story like that. I forget what it was about 10 minutes after I’m done with it, and somehow that seems like a waste. Sometimes people pull it off. Sometimes they don’t. Even romance should have character, I think.
On writing
Sometimes I need to read something really, very, spectacularly bad to get inspired. Is that weird?
On fandoms (again)
Generally, I’m ‘that guy.’ Facts about certain universes just stick to me without my conscious will. My memory works that way, I can’t help it. I don’t speak Klingon, but I usually have my facts straight and if in doubt, I’ll check before typing. I don’t think it makes me a geek or a weirdo or ‘plot-obsessed pr0n-deficient author.’
But. I cannot begin to tell you how very much I don’t give a damn about whether or not Vulcan body temperature is higher or lower than human. I want to be very clear: I could give a damn. That’s grammatically incorrect, but the point stands.
Like, a person reads this magnificent fandom-shaping story (Merlin, DRP, just in case) with its amazing plotline and thrilling romance and humor and characters and everything - and what does that person say afterwards? That the Britpick wasn’t perfect. Because that’s what’s important, sure. I mean, I don’t know you, and I’m sorry, but you’re anal, okay?
Reactions like that always make me seethe. Doesn’t even matter if it’s to one of my stories or someone else’s. I always want to ask this person if he or she have any idea about how much work goes into writing, never mind writing something like that. This is not concrit. This is you telling me (or whoever) ‘So you think you’ve created something impressive here? Let me tell you exactly how you haven’t.’ Curiously, people making this kind of comments are almost never authors themselves. Is this some kind of passive-aggressive I-want-to-stand-in-the-spotlight thing?
On ship wars
Seriously? For how long will this be going on? I don’t remember what discussion it was, but someone said that, in this fandom, as long as you have any kind of opinion and speak your mind, you’ll inevitably offend someone. Which is true, and also unhealthy. Also, I don’t understand why we have to talk about it at all. If we’re writers - we write. Character bashing of any kind speaks only of the lack of taste, but that’s not something that can be helped or universally controlled. Likes and dislikes are always subjective and could never be governed. What’s the point of aggravating each other?
On tropes
I love misunderstandings. And obliviousness. I love first times and maybe a little angst. I don’t understand mpreg, even though it’s practically canon. I don’t like feral anyone, but I love protectiveness. I love it very much indeed, when it’s not taken to the point of absurdity or crack. I love UST that is eventually resolved, but not too early. I love suspense and tenstion.
On preferred positions (fiction)
I like when my favorites bottom. I think it has a lot to do with who my favorites are, otherwise go figure. I don’t believe that people always do the same things in bed, and I write it both ways, depending on the mood and circumstances. But if we’re talking preferences, bottom it is.
On RL and LJ
Sometimes people disappear and you don’t know if you’re supposed to follow them or leave them alone. I don’t like feeling like a stalker, but sometimes it gets lonely out there.
On words
I never use 5 if I can use 50. I’m not proud of that.
On life (once more)
If I’m not under a deadline, I can forget what day of the week it is. Actual dates are worse.
On celebrity crushes
If Colin Morgan were any cuter, I don’t think I’d believe in his existence.
On shame
I don’t have it.
On willpower
Sadly, same story as with shame.
I respect the right of every user to choose whatever layout they fancy, but I hate when people opt for black/dark background and white font color. The writers, I mean. I know it’s a matter of taste, but it hurts my eyes. And yes, I can use the ?style=mine thing, but the very necessity to do it annoys me, and I’ve noticed that I only do that for the authors I know and love. If the author is unknown to me, I tend to just close the story and never go back to it again.
Same happens, BTW, with layouts that have the text in a narrow column. Seriously, this isn’t twitter. Why subject people to this? I don’t get it.
Another thing, lj-cut. I had to cut some friends just because they’d never use it like it hurts them or something. Huge blocks of text are annoying enough when I’m at home, but when I read off my mobile screen? They’re way beyond that.
On kinks (not really)
Noticed an interesting thing. I like an element of jealousy here and there, but not if it’s followed through. Like, if person A flirts with person C and person B is jealous, it’s fine, but if A actually sleeps with C, I tend to get upset. Illogical, I know, just noticed this about myself. There’s a very popular and famous ST AU where, after Jim and Spock get together, Jim has to leave, and since it’s sort of an end of the relationship (or seems like it at the time), he gets together with other people because sex is nice and all that. It doesn’t constitute cheating, but I remember feeling very upset when I reached that point of the storyline, and, after that, the renewed romance tasted a bit off to me. *shrugs* I’m not saying it’s unrealistic or OOC or has no right to be. Just one of my kinks/anti-kinks I guess.
On sex scenes
I read so many fics, it’s probably alarming. Good ones, too, there are a lot of really, really good authors in the fandoms I’m in. Still. Every time a character says ‘I want you to fuck me’ or ‘I need you inside me’ or something to similar effect, the vocabulary of the next paragraph could be predicted down to a word. Someone will always be ‘rummaging’ around something (most likely the nightstand) for lube and/or condoms. It’s almost never any other word, not ‘searching’ or ‘looking’ or anything else, mostly it’s rummaging. Magic word. I did that, too, seems like we all do it, but it is pretty amusing.
On character descriptions
I’ve been reading a lot of Merlin fics lately, reaching the point where I thought that if I come across the expression ‘a mop of black hair’ one more time I’d scream. I’m not seriously criticizing now, but this is what happens when you read fics in the same fandom one after another. I lost count how many authors used that ‘mop of black hair’ when describing Merlin. I began to wonder if there was some kind of fandom memo about that, making the use of this expression mandatory or something. :)
Just as Castiel always has ‘the bluest eyes anyone’s ever seen.’ They are always so blue it’s unnatural. No, no, don’t get me wrong, I’m right there with you, but it’s a little bit funny.
I mean, in most stories we write, we have to make a character introduction even if we all know already what the character in question looks like. And there are of course, only so many ways to describe the same features. Still, amusing, that.
On sex scenes (again)
There’s a popular opinion that fanfiction exists for pr0n. Lately, I find myself scrolling through sex scenes a lot. They just fail to catch my attention. If there’s no underlying emotion, no background churning of feelings, or something beneath it, the descriptions tend to get repetitive and boring. Seriously, I used to think one couldn’t possibly get bored reading smut. Yep, one could. If the setting is off, if characterizations are bad, if I realize that, instead of ‘Dean and Cas’ or ‘Jim and Spock’ I can put any other two names - any other - into the scene and nothing will change, it’s a huge turn off. Like, what’s the point? When you’ve read your 50th description of a blowjob, you really don’t care all that much about the mechanics, even assuming you once had. There has to be something else, something more. Which, thank you, Pinto fandom and your queens of pr0n. You always do it, ladies, I don’t know how, but even with your PWPs, you always deliver. Kudos.
On life
You know, when you’re a child, and you do something wrong, there’s this feeling of guilt that you absolutely can’t withstand? Like you ate sweets before dinner or something, or lied, and your Mom is looking at you all disappointed, and refuses to speak to you. And you can’t stand it, you mope around, feeling worse and worse, until finally you say ‘sorry, I’ll never do that again, I’m so sorry’ and hear ‘I forgive you’ in return. There’s this feeling of grief and weight, a physical one, being lifted off your shoulders at that moment. It doesn’t go away. When we grow up, we say that ‘it’s complicated’ and go with that notion, but it’s the same story, really. We never grow out of the need to be forgiven when we screwed up. We just lie to ourselves that we have, or that ‘it’s no big deal, really,’ or that simply saying ‘sorry’ doesn’t change anything. It does. Maybe not as simple as that, but yeah, it matters.
On fandoms
God, I’m such a slasher it’s not even funny. I think the last het pairing I shipped was Mulder/Scully. Which makes it so frustrating when your pairing of choice has all the chemistry in the world and yet will always remain bromance at best. Because the show is supposed to be family friendly, or is too mainstream for gay, or - I don’t even know. It’s sad. It’s annoying when show producers make the protagonist sleep with the first convenient woman, no matter how OOC or out of the blue it will seem, just to underline that he’s not gay. I mean, sure, there’s Torchwood (gotta love the Brits), and there’s Queer as Folk, but still, it’s somehow so not satisfying.
On life (again)
My parents think that being gay is unnatural. Literally against nature. I never realized how much it would hurt me to hear them say that. They are highly intelligent, educated people. These are their sincere convictions. Knowing that is painful to me beyond what I can tell.
On fanfiction
I like romance. Hell, I love romance. But when I read something along the lines of ‘they met, they liked each other, they went out, liked each other more, moved together, and lived happily ever after’ it’s disappointing. Stories like that are sweet and lovely, but, to me, they are about nothing. If there isn’t some plot, or intrigue, or mystery, or misunderstanding - or something - it’s just romance for the sake of romance, I can’t get invested in a story like that. I forget what it was about 10 minutes after I’m done with it, and somehow that seems like a waste. Sometimes people pull it off. Sometimes they don’t. Even romance should have character, I think.
On writing
Sometimes I need to read something really, very, spectacularly bad to get inspired. Is that weird?
On fandoms (again)
Generally, I’m ‘that guy.’ Facts about certain universes just stick to me without my conscious will. My memory works that way, I can’t help it. I don’t speak Klingon, but I usually have my facts straight and if in doubt, I’ll check before typing. I don’t think it makes me a geek or a weirdo or ‘plot-obsessed pr0n-deficient author.’
But. I cannot begin to tell you how very much I don’t give a damn about whether or not Vulcan body temperature is higher or lower than human. I want to be very clear: I could give a damn. That’s grammatically incorrect, but the point stands.
Like, a person reads this magnificent fandom-shaping story (Merlin, DRP, just in case) with its amazing plotline and thrilling romance and humor and characters and everything - and what does that person say afterwards? That the Britpick wasn’t perfect. Because that’s what’s important, sure. I mean, I don’t know you, and I’m sorry, but you’re anal, okay?
Reactions like that always make me seethe. Doesn’t even matter if it’s to one of my stories or someone else’s. I always want to ask this person if he or she have any idea about how much work goes into writing, never mind writing something like that. This is not concrit. This is you telling me (or whoever) ‘So you think you’ve created something impressive here? Let me tell you exactly how you haven’t.’ Curiously, people making this kind of comments are almost never authors themselves. Is this some kind of passive-aggressive I-want-to-stand-in-the-spotlight thing?
On ship wars
Seriously? For how long will this be going on? I don’t remember what discussion it was, but someone said that, in this fandom, as long as you have any kind of opinion and speak your mind, you’ll inevitably offend someone. Which is true, and also unhealthy. Also, I don’t understand why we have to talk about it at all. If we’re writers - we write. Character bashing of any kind speaks only of the lack of taste, but that’s not something that can be helped or universally controlled. Likes and dislikes are always subjective and could never be governed. What’s the point of aggravating each other?
On tropes
I love misunderstandings. And obliviousness. I love first times and maybe a little angst. I don’t understand mpreg, even though it’s practically canon. I don’t like feral anyone, but I love protectiveness. I love it very much indeed, when it’s not taken to the point of absurdity or crack. I love UST that is eventually resolved, but not too early. I love suspense and tenstion.
On preferred positions (fiction)
I like when my favorites bottom. I think it has a lot to do with who my favorites are, otherwise go figure. I don’t believe that people always do the same things in bed, and I write it both ways, depending on the mood and circumstances. But if we’re talking preferences, bottom it is.
On RL and LJ
Sometimes people disappear and you don’t know if you’re supposed to follow them or leave them alone. I don’t like feeling like a stalker, but sometimes it gets lonely out there.
On words
I never use 5 if I can use 50. I’m not proud of that.
On life (once more)
If I’m not under a deadline, I can forget what day of the week it is. Actual dates are worse.
On celebrity crushes
If Colin Morgan were any cuter, I don’t think I’d believe in his existence.
On shame
I don’t have it.
On willpower
Sadly, same story as with shame.