Petak, 9. ramazan 1444
I see that, in my last entry, I mentioned a podcast interview with a spiritual teacher who works to facilitate the cultivation of awareness. I have continued to listen to and/or watch interviews with him and presentations by him over the last week. Yesterday I met with him for an introductory Zoom session. I am scheduled to participate in a group intro session with him this afternoon.
I find myself recalling details, including feelings, associated with my former involvement in the Amma organization. I have had the conscious intention of seeking healing from unresolved issues from that period, since at least last spring. Now that feelings are beginning to move around the issue of connecting with spiritual seekers and teachers once again, I am feeling quite vulnerable.
I see parallels to the period when I lived in Atlanta where, especially within the last year and a half of my time there, my involvement in spiritual activities--both with a Sufi order and with LGBT Muslims--intensified. When I moved to where I live now, my activity and identification with Sufism was something that I presented to people as part of who I am, which is something I'm doing now as well.
This leads me to sense that I am already in the process of leaving my current situation, just as I gradually came to sense that I was preparing to leave Atlanta at least a year before I began to act on that intention concretely.
Peace,
KH