Life happens to us.
That's what I was telling Hans last night. We can attempt to plan things until the end of time, but it always seems to be that we're just some of those people that life happens to. You know what I mean? You're going along, thinking you've got it all planned out and figured out, then WHAM! life happens and everything changes.
Take, for instance, our meeting. We had both broken up, neither really looking for a relationship. I was dating another guy, he was dating a few other people. Then, one night no one I thought I could count on was available when I needed them, but he was. WHAM! We were together, and it was right.
Then we decided that we were going to wait until we'd been married 5 years to start having kids. We put a lot of thought and discussion into this decision. Then WHAM! A couple of weeks later we found out I was pregnant with Aliceon.
We moved to NC, bought a house and thought we were set for life. WHAM! Things happened and we ended up selling 18 months after we bought and moving to Tampa.
There were a few more WHAM! moments between then and now, most notably being diagnosed with cancer last summer. Now it seems like we're in store for another one. Or two. As Hans and I were discussing some upcoming changes in our life, I realized this. I realized that we just need to let things fall where they may. Or rather, I need to let things fall where they may and not stress out so much over things not turning out the way I had originally planned. Life may just happen to us, but it always happens the way it should, and everything works out for the best. I have to learn not to resist the forward motion of our lives and be more flexible. Our history tells me that each WHAM! has meant something bigger and better for our family, something good, whether I realized it at the moment or not.
Things are changing in our lives yet again, and I'm allowing myself to stress and freak out over all of it. I'm worrying about things that, really, i have no reason to worry about. It's making me grumpy and irritable and doing crappy things to my body. I need to just relax. It's all going to work out in the end, right?