(no subject)

[kenshai]

What is it when you dont have something to wake up for should you just be there all the time and stay asleep....or wait for something to happen, maybe try and make it happen. but if nothing is happening why wake up? almost nothing is different each day you can predict what happens why do it? why not just dont do anything? change is good in most cases right? well right now any change would be a good change as long as its a change i think....times where things were simple were great now everything is complicated to me...this existance is so blank and so unwilling for me right now its almost a dictation of the world and my mind mixed and strewn around so much that i cant decipher anything singular and must be in clusters that are unrealistic in manners of explaining and making sense of any of it. if i dont change the way i am it will destroy me and ruin the existance of me and make me cold and isolate the existance i have in a small area and bring out the part of me that i dont like....im out for now kinda annoyed

Aishiteru
Ryan