[oneshot] what you should do when life hands you a frying pan.
title: what you should do when life hands you a frying pan.
by: lina (osakaromanesque)
genre: lol random?
a/n: dear koneho, please consider this one-shot attempt to random lol as your birthday present. Because I am poor and I have no idea what to get your for your birthday. Excuse the grammatical errors as it is now 4.45am and I should sleep because I have to wake up in 5 hours to go back to hell. This was also written after my half-day movie marathon. Written in Ryu Murakami’s “69” style because he is a great, great man 8Dv written in a first-person POV. 3 ossans + tacchon lolllllll I am random.
So here’s the story, okay? It’s been a long day at practice and everyone’s just tired and cranky. But as usual, Mr. Shingo Murakami is the only one with energy left. I seriously have no idea how the man does it but he just has this stored energy somewhere in his body. And it was then he came up with the genius idea to get groceries and cook dinner. Ryo didn’t really have to say anything since immediately after practice he hopped onto the first train he could get to Tokyo. Yasu had a tummy ache and Maru had to take care of his sick baby sister.
So that leaves Hina, Yoko, Subaru and me.
I would usually eat out because I can’t cook worth shit. The only people who can cook in the whole group would probably be Ryo, Yasu, Maru and Hina. In attempts to save money - which I don’t really have to but it’s a habit I should really cultivate - I followed them grocery shopping.
So now I’m at the apartment of Shingo Murakami wearing an apron. I really don’t know why Hina is letting me cook. The last time I attempted to help him and Ryo cook, I almost burned Hina’s whole kitchen and probably the whole apartment down. Oh wait, ahaha, he’s telling me to standby for dishwashing. Okay cool dishwashing I can do. So really, all I have to do is just observe.
Right now I’m watching three mid-20s men trying to cook tonight’s dinner, which is yakisoba. Hina picks the weirdest assistants. I think he’d be better off cooking on his own but this could be fun. Let’s just hope no one burns anything - or anyone - down. Yoko is lazy and everyone and their mothers know how much Yoko hates cooking. Well actually, he dislikes anything that he has to prepare himself. Subaru is just, well, Subaru. He heard he almost blew up Yasu’s kitchen. But those were just rumors. I think Subaru did something to Yasu to make him shut up.
ANY-THE-FUCKING-WAY, so Yoko puts in three packs of soba into a pot of boiling hot water because everyone knows we all eat like pigs. Hina is preparing the chicken - cleaning and cutting - while Subaru cuts the vegetables. This is the first time I am witnessing Subaru cutting vegetables and I have to say he’s pretty good at it.
Okay scratch that, Subaru Shibutani just cut his finger.
He drops the knife and starts jumping around. Hina hits him upside the head and tells him to chill the fuck out. He orders me to get the first aid kit from the bathroom. Top cabinet, first shelf, you can’t miss it. And so I followed the older man’s orders and got the kit from the bathroom. After treating Subaru’s cut, it was back to preparing.
“Something’s burning,” I tell them.
The pot of soba noodles is overflowing and some of the soba had already spill out of the pot and into the fire. Yoko panics and Hina turns the stove off. I snicker at Yoko being a total girl and Hina carries the pot into the sink. The valley between his eyebrows became smaller and smaller.
But he refuses to give up. No. We all had a common goal. And that is to eat.
After a few more accidents - Yoko getting burned by the hot water, Subaru crying from onions and garlic, Yoko sneezing over the pepper - the large frying pan makes its appearance. Using the skills he picked up from watching too much of those Chinese cooking shows - yes, he does watch something other than soccer - Hina commenced the frying of the soba.
Oil, onion, garlic, chili, sauce, chicken and finally soba. Clang, clang, clang goes the spatula against the frying pan. And Hina’s cell phone rings.
“Subaru, take over will you?” Hina tells him and runs to his bedroom to answer his cell phone.
“Uh-oh” I mutter and take a step back.
“So, Yoko, how do we do this?” Subaru asks.
“Do what Hina did.”
Subaru attempts and fails. He spills some of the noodle onto the floor.
“Let me do it.” Yoko steps up to the challenge.
He gets the hang of it and the fire grows bigger.
And something smells like it’s burning.
“You better turn it off then,” I tell them.
“Well smartass, why don’t you come here and do it?” Yoko shoots a dirty look at me.
“I am not allowed into the kitchen ever since the incident.”
“Excuses.”
Hina comes out running. “What is that sme- WHOA!”
So apparently, during the split second we turn to look at Hina, the fire got bigger. Like, seriously big. Much worst than my incident.
“Where’s the bloody fire extinguisher?” Subaru panics.
“I don’t have one!” Hina tells them.
“I-WHAT?”
“Do something!” Yoko panics as well.
“WATER! Tatsuyoshi, help me out with the water will you?” says Hina.
So after ten bowls of water, the fire is out. The yakisoba - or what should’ve been yakisoba - is all soggy and obviously not edible. Plus it’s burned to a crisp, in addition to being soggy.
But we are still hungry.
“Chinese take-out anyone?” I suggest.
The three of them shoot me dirty looks. I feel a sudden chill down my spine.
“Well, it’s not like we have a choice…” I mutter.
“You’re paying,” says Yoko.
When life gives you a frying pan, you cook in it. But please, at least make sure you know how to cook to begin with.
by: lina (osakaromanesque)
genre: lol random?
a/n: dear koneho, please consider this one-shot attempt to random lol as your birthday present. Because I am poor and I have no idea what to get your for your birthday. Excuse the grammatical errors as it is now 4.45am and I should sleep because I have to wake up in 5 hours to go back to hell. This was also written after my half-day movie marathon. Written in Ryu Murakami’s “69” style because he is a great, great man 8Dv written in a first-person POV. 3 ossans + tacchon lolllllll I am random.
So here’s the story, okay? It’s been a long day at practice and everyone’s just tired and cranky. But as usual, Mr. Shingo Murakami is the only one with energy left. I seriously have no idea how the man does it but he just has this stored energy somewhere in his body. And it was then he came up with the genius idea to get groceries and cook dinner. Ryo didn’t really have to say anything since immediately after practice he hopped onto the first train he could get to Tokyo. Yasu had a tummy ache and Maru had to take care of his sick baby sister.
So that leaves Hina, Yoko, Subaru and me.
I would usually eat out because I can’t cook worth shit. The only people who can cook in the whole group would probably be Ryo, Yasu, Maru and Hina. In attempts to save money - which I don’t really have to but it’s a habit I should really cultivate - I followed them grocery shopping.
So now I’m at the apartment of Shingo Murakami wearing an apron. I really don’t know why Hina is letting me cook. The last time I attempted to help him and Ryo cook, I almost burned Hina’s whole kitchen and probably the whole apartment down. Oh wait, ahaha, he’s telling me to standby for dishwashing. Okay cool dishwashing I can do. So really, all I have to do is just observe.
Right now I’m watching three mid-20s men trying to cook tonight’s dinner, which is yakisoba. Hina picks the weirdest assistants. I think he’d be better off cooking on his own but this could be fun. Let’s just hope no one burns anything - or anyone - down. Yoko is lazy and everyone and their mothers know how much Yoko hates cooking. Well actually, he dislikes anything that he has to prepare himself. Subaru is just, well, Subaru. He heard he almost blew up Yasu’s kitchen. But those were just rumors. I think Subaru did something to Yasu to make him shut up.
ANY-THE-FUCKING-WAY, so Yoko puts in three packs of soba into a pot of boiling hot water because everyone knows we all eat like pigs. Hina is preparing the chicken - cleaning and cutting - while Subaru cuts the vegetables. This is the first time I am witnessing Subaru cutting vegetables and I have to say he’s pretty good at it.
Okay scratch that, Subaru Shibutani just cut his finger.
He drops the knife and starts jumping around. Hina hits him upside the head and tells him to chill the fuck out. He orders me to get the first aid kit from the bathroom. Top cabinet, first shelf, you can’t miss it. And so I followed the older man’s orders and got the kit from the bathroom. After treating Subaru’s cut, it was back to preparing.
“Something’s burning,” I tell them.
The pot of soba noodles is overflowing and some of the soba had already spill out of the pot and into the fire. Yoko panics and Hina turns the stove off. I snicker at Yoko being a total girl and Hina carries the pot into the sink. The valley between his eyebrows became smaller and smaller.
But he refuses to give up. No. We all had a common goal. And that is to eat.
After a few more accidents - Yoko getting burned by the hot water, Subaru crying from onions and garlic, Yoko sneezing over the pepper - the large frying pan makes its appearance. Using the skills he picked up from watching too much of those Chinese cooking shows - yes, he does watch something other than soccer - Hina commenced the frying of the soba.
Oil, onion, garlic, chili, sauce, chicken and finally soba. Clang, clang, clang goes the spatula against the frying pan. And Hina’s cell phone rings.
“Subaru, take over will you?” Hina tells him and runs to his bedroom to answer his cell phone.
“Uh-oh” I mutter and take a step back.
“So, Yoko, how do we do this?” Subaru asks.
“Do what Hina did.”
Subaru attempts and fails. He spills some of the noodle onto the floor.
“Let me do it.” Yoko steps up to the challenge.
He gets the hang of it and the fire grows bigger.
And something smells like it’s burning.
“You better turn it off then,” I tell them.
“Well smartass, why don’t you come here and do it?” Yoko shoots a dirty look at me.
“I am not allowed into the kitchen ever since the incident.”
“Excuses.”
Hina comes out running. “What is that sme- WHOA!”
So apparently, during the split second we turn to look at Hina, the fire got bigger. Like, seriously big. Much worst than my incident.
“Where’s the bloody fire extinguisher?” Subaru panics.
“I don’t have one!” Hina tells them.
“I-WHAT?”
“Do something!” Yoko panics as well.
“WATER! Tatsuyoshi, help me out with the water will you?” says Hina.
So after ten bowls of water, the fire is out. The yakisoba - or what should’ve been yakisoba - is all soggy and obviously not edible. Plus it’s burned to a crisp, in addition to being soggy.
But we are still hungry.
“Chinese take-out anyone?” I suggest.
The three of them shoot me dirty looks. I feel a sudden chill down my spine.
“Well, it’s not like we have a choice…” I mutter.
“You’re paying,” says Yoko.
When life gives you a frying pan, you cook in it. But please, at least make sure you know how to cook to begin with.