(no subject)
stupid, stupid, stupid, stupid.
So many things are so stupid right now. How can everything be going so well, yet at the same time be going to badly? I feel like my life mocks me sometimes. There's school: I got a B on my 1st test but I don't actually feel like I know anything useful from it so god only knows that my next test will be a D or F or Z and I could study it when sitting by the pool but I choose to read Harry Potter, do crosswords, and chit-chat with the hotel bartenders instead. And another thing about that job is that I've been working so much recently that you'd think I'd have made enough money to buy a football team by now, but the thing is, those asswipes don't give me my paycheck for anothere week and a half. So I feel like I work for nothing because I have nothing to show for it yet. Gay. Then there's the fact that I'm trying to date someone right now whom I actually like but god thought it would be funny to make it so there was never a seconds of the week when both of us were free (no work or class or friend time). And really it's all my friends here too who work during the day where as I work at night. ANd during the day. Come to think its my fault that I can't hang out with people. I seriously feel like I need to schedule in friends and I hate making "appointments" like that when I most just like randomly hanging out with people.
So my schedule will continue to mock me and this was the 1st time since saturday I didn't have to work a 10hr+ day (only 4 at SLU's pool). Tomorrow: class 9:50-11:30, SLU Rec 12-4, Best Western 4-10. Friday I finally get to hit pause--no work at all! THen sat 10-10. I'm boring. I brought this on myself. I need to go to sleep.
So many things are so stupid right now. How can everything be going so well, yet at the same time be going to badly? I feel like my life mocks me sometimes. There's school: I got a B on my 1st test but I don't actually feel like I know anything useful from it so god only knows that my next test will be a D or F or Z and I could study it when sitting by the pool but I choose to read Harry Potter, do crosswords, and chit-chat with the hotel bartenders instead. And another thing about that job is that I've been working so much recently that you'd think I'd have made enough money to buy a football team by now, but the thing is, those asswipes don't give me my paycheck for anothere week and a half. So I feel like I work for nothing because I have nothing to show for it yet. Gay. Then there's the fact that I'm trying to date someone right now whom I actually like but god thought it would be funny to make it so there was never a seconds of the week when both of us were free (no work or class or friend time). And really it's all my friends here too who work during the day where as I work at night. ANd during the day. Come to think its my fault that I can't hang out with people. I seriously feel like I need to schedule in friends and I hate making "appointments" like that when I most just like randomly hanging out with people.
So my schedule will continue to mock me and this was the 1st time since saturday I didn't have to work a 10hr+ day (only 4 at SLU's pool). Tomorrow: class 9:50-11:30, SLU Rec 12-4, Best Western 4-10. Friday I finally get to hit pause--no work at all! THen sat 10-10. I'm boring. I brought this on myself. I need to go to sleep.