fan fiction: finding home chapter 5
A/N: A million, million apologies for taking so long. I had a demonic time getting the next 2 chapters hashed out. I hope you're all still with me! But I know where I'm going now (yay!), so updates should be a whole lot more regular now-I'm aiming for twice a week. This chapter is sort of transitional; it will kick of the second arc. Hope you enjoy!
Since it's been ages, here's Chapter Four.
Chapter Five-Search for Normalcy
"I'll call you soon," Vala told Bryce as she prepared to leave with her former teammates.
He nodded, eyes red and jaw tight. She knew this was hard for him. It wasn't any easier for her, really, saying goodbye. As thrilled as she was to be reunited with her friends, she did care an awful lot about Bryce. He'd been her dearest friend for so long. Vala hugged him hard, sniffling. He kissed the top her her head. "Take care of yourself, okay?"
"I will," she promised thickly. "You too. And thank you-for everything."
"I was glad to do it. You know that."
Vala nodded and kissed him quickly. She'd better do this now, or she'd never manage to do it at all. "Bye."
She hurried to catch up with the others. Daniel refused to even look at her, but Samantha touched her arm gently. "Hey. You all right?"
"I will be." Vala forced herself to smile.
Samantha nodded, giving her a quick one-armed hug. "We'll have a girls' night soon. I've got a bottle of wine I've been saving for the occasion."
"That sounds marvelous."
Samantha spoke quietly into her comm. "Standby. We're going to find a safe spot, then we'll be ready to beam out. Five of us."
Having always been somewhat "hands on" with Daniel regardless of their romantic status, Vala tucked her arm through his. He stiffened, but he'd done that a lot in the early days, so she just hugged his arm tighter to her. "I'm looking forward to seeing everyone at the SGC again."
"Whole lotta people gonna be awfully glad to see you," Cameron said.
"Well, I am pretty delightful. Whatever did you do without me for so long?"
"Hell if I know." Cam grinned at her. At least her friendship with him remained completely unaltered. Their banter felt safe, familiar.
They found an abandoned alleyway, and Samantha again radioed her crew. "Okay, we're in the clear. Go ahead."
The white light flashed, and Vala found herself on the bridge of the Hammond.
Samantha patted her back. "I'll be right back. I'm going to contact General Landry and let him know we found you and that we're coming in. Then we'll beam down."
"All right, sounds good."
And in a matter of mere moments, Vala found herself back at Cheyenne Mountain. She felt she'd cried a lifetime's worth of tears in the last couple of hours, but she couldn't seem to stop. Her eyes filled yet again as she looked around her.
She was home.
###
The next several days passed in a blur. Vala sat in meetings-so many meetings. Honestly, it took more meetings to return to the SGC than it had to join in the first place. First, it was with General Landry, who handed her a fat stack of paperwork to sign, accompanied by a lecture. "When we made you a full member of SG-1, Ms. Mal Doran, it was because we trusted you. We believed in you. That hasn't changed and isn't going to change. I would prefer you not pull a stunt like that again-we don't like leaving our people behind. But if it were to become necessary, you just get yourself back here as soon as you can." His gruff voice trailed off, and his expression softened. "Welcome home. It's good to have you back."
Then it was the IOA. That pretty much topped the list of not fun. They weren't content with one meeting; they wanted a whole string of them. Long, drawn-out, boring-as-hell meetings. Just when Vala thought she'd rather be back with Matthias than endure one more minute in the bureaucrats' presence, they finally declared themselves satisfied. They also assigned her new duties checking SGC security systems. General Landry gave her a big, shiny office to go with the new job. It was nice-okay, it was very nice-but she'd be lying if she said she didn't miss sharing with Daniel.
But she stayed busy, reuniting with Walter and Siler and Bill and Carolyn and a host of others she never dreamed would even notice her absence. Jack O'Neill even visited for a few days. In addition to new office space, the general assigned her to new, nicer quarters. Daniel and Samantha had saved all her stuff, and Jack and Cameron helped her move in.
She met the President. That was quite the experience. He was a delightful person, really. Incredibly fun to flirt with-he got so flustered.
And through all of it, she didn't see Daniel.
Well, that wasn't exactly true. He was there in meetings that involved the whole team and in the commissary with Cameron and Teal'c. But he seemed determined to avoid ever being alone with her.
Vala missed him terribly. She'd come back for him, left Bryce for him, given up New York for him-didn't he appreciate it? Wasn't this what he wanted? It sure had been what she'd wanted!
And they'd been friends long before they'd ever been lovers. Daniel had been her conscience, her rock, her cheerleader, her confidant (even when she'd been convinced she needed none of those things). He'd had seemed happy to see her back in New York. He'd hugged her and held her and told her he missed her. She'd come home with him-with the rest of the team as well, but let's be honest-mostly with him. Even if Daniel didn't want to be involved romantically with her anymore (and she could understand that, really), weren't they still friends? Still family?
She wasn't so sure anymore.
Well, no time like the present to find out. Vala headed to his office.
She paused in the doorway for a moment, just taking it in. It still looked much the same, with books and notes and artifacts piled on every surface and Daniel hunched over in concentration. How many times had she watched him in exactly that position? How many times had she sat here, reading a magazine or doing her nails, bored out of her skull but wanting to be with him?
Her new job wasn't boring, and she was grateful for that. But she still wanted to be near Daniel Jackson more than anything else. It sucked that her office was so far away. It sucked even more that he seemed determined to ignore her very existence. Finally giving up on the idea that he'd ever emerge from his work bubble and notice her standing there, Vala rapped on the doorway. "Hello. Busy?"
Daniel's head shot up. "Vala! Um. Hi. No, I'm-no, not really. Uh...come in."
The man was a linguist, and Vala had never known him to stumble over words like that. What in the worlds was wrong with him? She entered the office. "What are you working on?"
"Oh, some translation work from a recent mission. Nothing that will save the galaxy or anything."
"Why, Daniel, it must be a whole week now since you've saved the galaxy. You're slacking."
He chuckled, and she tried to remember the last time she'd heard him do that. Certainly sometime before that damn mission.
Vala loved to hear him laugh.
Her gaze flicked around the room again and fell to the picture of Sha're, still in its place of honor. Briefly she wondered about the woman who still inspired such devotion after all these years. What would it be like to be loved like that? Certainly Daniel wouldn't be ignoring Sha're if she'd returned, even after all this time.
No use dwelling. Vala gave herself an internal shake and wandered into the room. "It looks the same."
"Well, not exactly the same." To Vala's delight, Daniel's voice actually took on a teasing tone. "Your magazines and nail polish aren't cluttering up the place."
"I'll have to bring some over. Must've been terribly hard to work without them."
Daniel muttered something under his breath. Vala started to ask him to repeat it, but before she got a chance he was speaking again. "So how's your new office? You like it?"
"Oh, sure. Lots of space-very posh. Samantha said she'd help me decorate it. I don't suppose you'd want to help too?"
And Daniel was right back to awkward and stuttering. "Oh, ah, well, maybe..."
Vala rolled her eyes. "Forget it, Daniel. Don't put yourself out."
He sighed heavily and pinched the bridge of his nose. "I'm sorry. Really. I don't...I just don't know how to do this."
That caused her to scrunch up her face in confusion. "How to do what?"
"This. Us. I don't know how to do us anymore."
Hurt sliced through her, and she forced a hollow-sounding laugh. "Surely it's not that complicated. We're friends, aren't we? I mean, we were friends before...before everything. So why can't we be friends again now?" She wasn't surprised he no longer wanted anything beyond friendship with her; she didn't think he'd ever really wanted anything more in the first place. It had just kind of happened. They'd almost fallen into it. No doubt he'd come to his senses during the years apart. "I still...care about you very much."
"I know. I...care about you too. It's just...kind of hard to get that rhythm back, you know? We were friends, and then we were...whatever we were, and then you were gone. And now...now I don't know how to do it right."
Taking a chance, Vala moved closer to him. "I don't know either, darling. But I don't think we'll figure it out by you avoiding me."
This time Daniel was the one who released a humorless laugh. "You're right. Of course you're right. I'm sorry, Vala." He hesitated then touched the side of her face. "I'll do better. Starting now. How about some coffee?"
She grinned playfully. "You can do better than that, Daniel. How about lunch? I'll even buy. Make up for all those times I mooched off of you."
He laughed again, genuinely this time. "One lunch wouldn't even begin to do that."
"You're right. And I'll never be able to pay it all back anyway, so why bother? You can treat."
"I think I've been had."
"You know you've missed it."
His expression softened. "You're right; I have." He gave her an awkward sideways bump. Not quite like the nudges of days gone by, but he was trying. "And just for that, I will treat. Come on, I'll take you to that sushi place you like so much."
Feeling hopeful, Vala followed him out the door. Surely this meant everything would be fine now. Surely everything would return to normal.
It had to, right?
Continue on to Chapter 6.