Bruises that won't heal.
I've had a crazy ass week, emotionally.
Work's been okay, I worked every other day this week so it was quite pleasant.
But maybe it's because I'm sort of on my period? Don't ask, I have feminine issues. I have my period for like a half of a second but my emotions are still all FUCKED.
No alarms, and no surprises, please.
So I had a dream about Spenser the other night, we were laying in the floor together and I cried and pleaded with him to come back. Then I ended up somehow talking to Liz and I felt so worthless in the dream, like that she was better than me and that I deserved whatever happened. It was not pleasant, because when I woke up and realized that I hadn't been talking to Spenser I felt really sad. Luckily I was sleeping with Eric though, so when I woke up I was not alone.
I feel really stupid sometimes. Because as much as I like Eric, I still completely drool over his brother Jon and I'm constantly wondering why I wasn't good enough for him. I think I may still like him quite a bit. JESUS CHRIST, THAT'S FUCKED. Now he is talking to Layla, who used to be my best friend, and I wonder why the fuck she is so much better than me. Oh yeah, I know why, because she is as dumb as a fucking brick and Jon loves to be the smart one in a relationship. What a dick, right? I don't know that I'll ever be cool with the way that he totally rejected me though, so maybe it's normal to feel this way. I just feel guilty because Eric is so right and nice, and Jon isn't.
That may be confusing to some of you, but umm SUCK MY DICK.
Listening to Radiohead at night is a bad idea. When I hear them though I think about when I saw them live and it gives me chillbumps.
I WISH THAT I GAVE LESS OF A SHIT ABOUT EVERYTHING. GHAIASUJSAGYHEJYGHERSRUJEHFG.
This entry was pointless, I originally had a lot to say. Who knows what happened. I'm missing Pulp Fiction.
Work's been okay, I worked every other day this week so it was quite pleasant.
But maybe it's because I'm sort of on my period? Don't ask, I have feminine issues. I have my period for like a half of a second but my emotions are still all FUCKED.
No alarms, and no surprises, please.
So I had a dream about Spenser the other night, we were laying in the floor together and I cried and pleaded with him to come back. Then I ended up somehow talking to Liz and I felt so worthless in the dream, like that she was better than me and that I deserved whatever happened. It was not pleasant, because when I woke up and realized that I hadn't been talking to Spenser I felt really sad. Luckily I was sleeping with Eric though, so when I woke up I was not alone.
I feel really stupid sometimes. Because as much as I like Eric, I still completely drool over his brother Jon and I'm constantly wondering why I wasn't good enough for him. I think I may still like him quite a bit. JESUS CHRIST, THAT'S FUCKED. Now he is talking to Layla, who used to be my best friend, and I wonder why the fuck she is so much better than me. Oh yeah, I know why, because she is as dumb as a fucking brick and Jon loves to be the smart one in a relationship. What a dick, right? I don't know that I'll ever be cool with the way that he totally rejected me though, so maybe it's normal to feel this way. I just feel guilty because Eric is so right and nice, and Jon isn't.
That may be confusing to some of you, but umm SUCK MY DICK.
Listening to Radiohead at night is a bad idea. When I hear them though I think about when I saw them live and it gives me chillbumps.
I WISH THAT I GAVE LESS OF A SHIT ABOUT EVERYTHING. GHAIASUJSAGYHEJYGHERSRUJEHFG.
This entry was pointless, I originally had a lot to say. Who knows what happened. I'm missing Pulp Fiction.