(no subject)
Okay
It took me awhile to get the nuts to do this and much goading by Sarah, but it needs to be done.
After this post, all my my posts will be f-locked. I never really paid too much attention to that before because I really doubted the rest of the world would be all too interested in the rants and ramblings of the Surley Geo. It seems though a previous journal entry did attract some unanticipated attention.
Now, this is going to be difficult for me to address as I don't want to sound like I am accusing anyone of anything. Everyone on my friends list has either been a trusted friend for a long time or we somehow became livejournal friends based on a common community or interest or mutual friend and therefor should have no interest in my personal life beyond just amusing 'glad it's not me'-type reading.
I should also emphasize that I TRUST all my friends. I trust that everyone knows that they can be honest with me and talk to me freely.
I made a post awhile back about my ex. Yes, it was written in anger. I was frustrated with how alot of things happened after we broke up. Although what I said was in truth, it was said in way that could be taken as really hurtful and incredibly one-sided. It was never meant for him to read. I never addressed the issues in the post with him directly. I would have liked to, but the post was COPIED TO HIM before I could, diplomatically, express my frustrations. Also whoever copied that post did not post the one about 5 down written soon after we broke up which talked about the reasons for the break-up and my apprehensions. That one was much more reveling. It was also f-locked.
I just need to say that my ex was not, is not, a bad person. Dan treated me well while we were dating. We had good times. Things changed at the end. Not sure if it was because we initially met and dated as students and then the dynamic changed. Or maybe I changed. He is NOT entirely at fault. I also have no doubt that he loved me. I loved him. Perhaps it was unfair of me to post a rant like that and I will exercise more caution in the future. I was and still am upset about some things, but really what was said should not have been given to him without my knowledge and in a way that was, I get the impression, rather accusing. I should not have to defend either my post or my breakup. I should also have been given the opportunity to address issues with him in our own time. It would have come out at some point. I posted on LJ when and because I was frustrated. It was right after I talked to him and chose not to address the issues with him at that point. Instead I came here and let 'er rip, sort of speak. I think also, although he didn't say as much, he was rather hurt by it. Dan could have just gone off the deep end with me, and I would not have entirely blamed him, but he was really good and told me about it. He asked if it was true or a prank.
The purpose of me posting this is just to get an answer, not to accuse and not to get angry. I am assuming that if a friend did this they would have the best of intentions. I admit, at first I was really REALLY upset by it and concidered the possibility that it was done maliciously. I have calmed down now but I am still disappointed that it happened at all and I urge the person(s) who played a role in this to talk to me in private. I just want to know why you thought this was a good idea?
It took me awhile to get the nuts to do this and much goading by Sarah, but it needs to be done.
After this post, all my my posts will be f-locked. I never really paid too much attention to that before because I really doubted the rest of the world would be all too interested in the rants and ramblings of the Surley Geo. It seems though a previous journal entry did attract some unanticipated attention.
Now, this is going to be difficult for me to address as I don't want to sound like I am accusing anyone of anything. Everyone on my friends list has either been a trusted friend for a long time or we somehow became livejournal friends based on a common community or interest or mutual friend and therefor should have no interest in my personal life beyond just amusing 'glad it's not me'-type reading.
I should also emphasize that I TRUST all my friends. I trust that everyone knows that they can be honest with me and talk to me freely.
I made a post awhile back about my ex. Yes, it was written in anger. I was frustrated with how alot of things happened after we broke up. Although what I said was in truth, it was said in way that could be taken as really hurtful and incredibly one-sided. It was never meant for him to read. I never addressed the issues in the post with him directly. I would have liked to, but the post was COPIED TO HIM before I could, diplomatically, express my frustrations. Also whoever copied that post did not post the one about 5 down written soon after we broke up which talked about the reasons for the break-up and my apprehensions. That one was much more reveling. It was also f-locked.
I just need to say that my ex was not, is not, a bad person. Dan treated me well while we were dating. We had good times. Things changed at the end. Not sure if it was because we initially met and dated as students and then the dynamic changed. Or maybe I changed. He is NOT entirely at fault. I also have no doubt that he loved me. I loved him. Perhaps it was unfair of me to post a rant like that and I will exercise more caution in the future. I was and still am upset about some things, but really what was said should not have been given to him without my knowledge and in a way that was, I get the impression, rather accusing. I should not have to defend either my post or my breakup. I should also have been given the opportunity to address issues with him in our own time. It would have come out at some point. I posted on LJ when and because I was frustrated. It was right after I talked to him and chose not to address the issues with him at that point. Instead I came here and let 'er rip, sort of speak. I think also, although he didn't say as much, he was rather hurt by it. Dan could have just gone off the deep end with me, and I would not have entirely blamed him, but he was really good and told me about it. He asked if it was true or a prank.
The purpose of me posting this is just to get an answer, not to accuse and not to get angry. I am assuming that if a friend did this they would have the best of intentions. I admit, at first I was really REALLY upset by it and concidered the possibility that it was done maliciously. I have calmed down now but I am still disappointed that it happened at all and I urge the person(s) who played a role in this to talk to me in private. I just want to know why you thought this was a good idea?