It's Beginning to Look a lot Like Christmas
I'm starting to get really bad at updating this thing. I've had no time for anything lately and its pretty ridiculous. I havnt hung out w/ my friends a lot in god nos when, it seems all ive been doing is choir and work, choir and work. I love choir more than anything, but its kinda stessing me out lately. I guess i just need to chill out. February can't come soon enough.
A few things have been running through my mind lately. I've had a sense of loneliness set in. That was really just over the weekend. I was with people but still felt by myself and I really didnt like it. It felt like last year all over again. Last year when i felt alone in a crowded room, when i felt like i didnt exsist. I hate the feeling, when i feel like that, it feels like all my worst fears of being alone are coming true.
And then just the feeling of not being able to express my real feelings because Ive said them enough and have had them thrown back at me and its just a little frustrating. There are so many signs and reasons. I can't live without him much longer.
On a happier note, Outback party on Monday! I'm so excited! Nates coming with me so it should be a lot of fun. Its gonna be crazy. Our shows start next Tuesday, it should be an interesting season. Im so excited to go back to Daimler Chrysler!! yay for Airport. Ethan and I are singing "Baby It's Cold Outside" at the Holiday Concert. I'm soooo excited!!!!
So i've decided Im cutting off all of my hair. During break Im cutting it off. Kinda excited and scared all at the same time.
I need to go Christmas Shopping like whoooooooooooooooa. Where i'll find the money, im not sure, where ill find the time, even more unsure.
Well me and my unsure self are off to bed and what not. Hopefully I'll update before the end of the year :)
A few things have been running through my mind lately. I've had a sense of loneliness set in. That was really just over the weekend. I was with people but still felt by myself and I really didnt like it. It felt like last year all over again. Last year when i felt alone in a crowded room, when i felt like i didnt exsist. I hate the feeling, when i feel like that, it feels like all my worst fears of being alone are coming true.
And then just the feeling of not being able to express my real feelings because Ive said them enough and have had them thrown back at me and its just a little frustrating. There are so many signs and reasons. I can't live without him much longer.
On a happier note, Outback party on Monday! I'm so excited! Nates coming with me so it should be a lot of fun. Its gonna be crazy. Our shows start next Tuesday, it should be an interesting season. Im so excited to go back to Daimler Chrysler!! yay for Airport. Ethan and I are singing "Baby It's Cold Outside" at the Holiday Concert. I'm soooo excited!!!!
So i've decided Im cutting off all of my hair. During break Im cutting it off. Kinda excited and scared all at the same time.
I need to go Christmas Shopping like whoooooooooooooooa. Where i'll find the money, im not sure, where ill find the time, even more unsure.
Well me and my unsure self are off to bed and what not. Hopefully I'll update before the end of the year :)