Fic: Jack and the Bean Stock
Title: Jack and the Bean Stock
Rating: K
Fandom: The Mentalist
Word Count: 454
Summery: "In Jack and the Bean Stock, why didn't they just eat the cow when it stopped giving milk?" A crack fic of sorts
Authors Note: Inspired by a real live conversation on facebook where in I proposed the question and my friends proceeded to mock me.
Jack and the Bean Stock
“Do you know what I wonder?” Rigsby asked leaning back in in his desk chair and twisting side to side slightly.
“No,” Cho said, not looking up from the open file on his desk.
Ignoring him, Rigsby spoke again. “In Jack and the Bean Stock, why didn't they just eat the cow when it had stopped giving milk?”
“Wouldn't have been much of a story.” Cho said, still not looking up.
“It could still work. They eat the cow then Jack foes searching or food. Maybe he's begging for food, maybe he steals it. We know he's a thief.” Rigsby clearly wasn't going to let go of his idea.
“It was an old cow. The mean was probably too tough to eat.” Jane poke from his spot on the couch, swinging his feet to the ground and sitting up, interested in where the conversation was going.
“Ok, sure, but if you cook it long enough, or make sausage...” Rigsby let the thought linger, clearly not sure where to go from there.
“Not everyone has the skill to butcher an animal as large as a cow. Not to mention that they probably wouldn't be able to eat it before it went bad.” Cho said, finally looking up from his work.
“Ok, ok. But I still think if they were that desperate that they could manage it somehow.”
“Maybe,” Van Pelt said, speaking for the first time, “they couldn't eat the cow because it was the reincarnation of Jack's grandmother. It wouldn't be right to eat her.”
“Yeah, but--” Wayne started before being cut off by Lisbon who had come out of her office half way though Van Pelt's suggestion.
“It's a fairy tale! For crying out loud. British people in the 1700's didn't believe in reincarnation. It's silly story for kids. Now get back to work.”
Jane chuckled slightly as he laid back down on his couch. Cho shook his head an went back to his file. Van Pelt watched Lisbon walk back towards her office before smiling at Rigsby and returning her gaze to the computer screen in front of her.
Rigsby still sat in his chair, staring off into space and thinking. Could the cow have been the Grandmother? It would make sense why they were so attached to it. Maybe the guy who gave Jack the beans promised to take care of the cow and not eat it...
“Rigsby!” Lisbon's voice from her office door made him jump. “Stop thinking about it and get back to work!”
“Yes, Boss,” he mumbled turning his attention to the discarded stack of files on his desk. Next to him Cho smirked.